Kungakhathaliseki ukuba likhulu kangakanani iqabane lakho, okanye uqhuba kakuhle kangakanani, ezinye ubudlelwane azisebenzi.
Oko ngamanye amaxesha kuyehla kwimiba ephambili, njengamaxabiso ahlukeneyo okanye amava adlulileyo, kodwa ngamanye amaxesha kunokubakho umgca omncinci kakhulu phakathi kobudlelwane obunempilo obusebenzayo, kunye nokungonwabi okumiselwe ukuphela.
Kukho amanyathelo athile athe tye onokuwathatha ukuze wenze ubudlelwane bakho busebenze- ezi zizinto eninokuzenza nobabini neqabane lakho, ke ncokola nabo kwaye nizibophelele kwinkqubo.
1. Thetha ngokunyanisekileyo. Cela uxolo rhoqo.
Unxibelelwano oluvulekileyo nolunyanisekileyo lubalulekile kulwalamano olusempilweni. Le yeyona nto yenza umahluko phakathi kobudlelwane bokusebenza kunye nobudlelwane obungonwabisiyo obukhokelela kuqhawulo mtshato.
Funda indlela yokunxibelelana nabanye. Yibani nencoko malunga nezona zinto zisebenza kakuhle kuni nobabini. Ingaziva ityhafile okanye isisiyatha, kodwa iyakuhlawula ekuhambeni kwexesha.
Qonda ukuba unxibelelwano ayithethi ngokuthetha kuphela e omnye nomnye kungokuthetha nge kunye. Kukho umahluko omkhulu.
Eyokuqala ayisiyo ncoko yokwenyani- ngabantu ababini kuphela abethula iingcinga zabo komnye. Incoko eyinyani kukutshintshiselana ngeengcinga, imibuzo kunye neemvakalelo ezifuna zombini ukuvula iindlebe kunye nokuvula iingqondo kunye nomlomo ovaliweyo ngamanye amaxesha!
Ukuphulaphula - ukumamela ngenene- kuyafuneka ukuze nobabini nive ukuba niyamva. Oku kubandakanya ukubeka iingcinga zakho kwelinye icala ngelixa elinye lithetha. Sukuvumela ingqondo yakho ukuba ihlale apho icwangcisa indlela oza kuphendula ngayo ngeli lixa iqabane lakho lizama ukuveza izimvo zalo, kuba oku kuya kuma endleleni yokuba umamele ngenene oko bakuthethayo.
Cima nakuphi na ukuphazamiseka okunje ngeefowuni, oomabonakude, okanye umculo ongxolayo. Gxila kwinto enye nenye oyithethayo kwaye uyakufumanisa ukuba uziva ubhetele kakhulu emva koko.
Xa kuziwa kwiincoko ezinzulu, ungathanda ukuxoxa ngesihloko ngokukhawuleza ukuba siphume endleleni. Iqabane lakho linokukhetha ukushiya iincoko iintsuku ezimbalwa ukuze nobabini nibe nexesha lokucwangcisa kunye nokuqokelela iingcinga zenu. Nokuba ayilunganga okanye ayilunganga, ke kuya kufuneka ufumane umhlaba ophakathi osebenzela nina nobabini,
Zininzi izinto onokuzifunda malunga nendlela yokunxibelelana yomnye nomnye eya kukunceda nisebenze ngcono kunye njengesibini.
Unxibelelwano likuvumela ukuba ube nokuqonda okunzulu omnye komnye, kunye nobudlelwane obuphilileyo ngokupheleleyo. Inika ithuba lokuzibophelela ngakumbi kwinqanaba leemvakalelo.
Ukufunda ukucela uxolo kubaluleke kakhulu xa kufikwa kumba wokuba nobudlelwane obusempilweni. Ukuthatha ubunini beempazamo zakho, ukuqonda kunye novelwano ngendlela omenze ngayo umntu waziva, kwaye ngokuziphucula ngokwakho kubalulekile!
Bonisa iqabane lakho ukuba uyabaxabisa kwaye ubahloniphe ngokwaneleyo ukuba uvume ukwenza impazamo. Kwaye, ngokulinganayo kubalulekile, zibophelele ekubaboniseni ukuba ayizuphinda yenzeke.
Oku kuyazisebenza zombini ezi ndlela-kuya kufuneka ulwamkele uxolo ngamanye amaxesha. Isenokungabi yiyo into eyenzekileyo, kodwa kuya kufuneka unike iqabane lakho ityala ngokuthatha uxanduva kunye nokufunga ukuba uzakutshintsha ube ngcono.
2. Gcina imvakalelo yesiqu sakho.
Abantu abaninzi, ngakumbi abo batsha ukuthandana, kubonakala ngathi bacinga ukuba ukwenza ubudlelwane ubudlelwane kuthetha ukuphosa yonke into kuyo. Lonke ixesha lakho kunye namandla akho kunye nomnye 24/7, kwaye ngokwenene ukuba abathandani.
Ayisebenzi nje…
Kubalulekile ukugcina ubomi ngaphandle kolwalamano lwakho ukuba ufuna olo lwalamano luphumelele. Ingavakala ibuya umva kwabanye abantu, kodwa sithembele koku.
Ukuba uhlala ugxile kulwalamano lwakho, uya kufumana iziphene kuzo kuba uhlala uzihlalutya. Ngapha koko, uya kuthi mhlawumbi yenza iziphene.
ndinazo iimvakalelo ngaye?
Ukuba akukho nto uyenzayo ngaphandle kokuba iqabane lakho liyenza nawe, uya kubacaphukela kungekudala okanye kamva. Ngalo lonke ixesha umhlobo ekumemela kwenye indawo wedwa, umzekelo, uya kuthiya ngasese iqabane lakho kwinto ongayiyo.
Ukuba uyeka izinto ozithandayo kunye nezinto onomdla kuzo, uya uthembele ngokupheleleyo kwiqabane lakho ekuzalisekiseni zonke iimfuno onazo. Kodwa abayi kuze, bakwazi ukwenza oku, kwaye uyakuchukunyiswa yile nto, kwaye ube nexhala lokuba abakulungelanga kuba uziva ngathi awuhambelani.
Okukhona uqhubeka ebomini bakho, kokukhona unokunika iqabane lakho. Kwakhona, isenokuvakala ingaqhelekanga, kodwa iyasebenza nyani, kwaye ihlala ikwahlulahlula ubudlelwane obusempilweni kulowo umiselwe ukwahlukana.
Musa ukubeka uxinzelelo kwiqabane lakho, sukujonga kubo ukwanelisa zonke iinkalo zobukho bakho, kwaye ungavali yonke into, nawo wonke umntu, omnye ebomini bakho.
Endaweni yoko, hlala uxakekile, wenze okwakho, kwaye qhubeka nokuzimela . Ngale ndlela, uya kuziva ngathi ixesha kunye neqabane lakho lixesha elisemgangathweni, kwaye niyakonwabela inkampani yomnye nomnye kakhulu.
kunye nemfazwe enkulu yasebukhosini 2019
3. Sebenza ngokwakho.
Ngokufana nenqaku elidlulileyo, kuninzi ekufuneka kuthethwe ngenkqubela phambili ezimeleyo.
Oko kuthetha ukuba ayisebenzi nje kulwalamano ukuze lwenze ulwalamano lusebenze.
Ukuba ufuna ukuba kubudlelwane obusempilweni, kufuneka ube ngabantu ababini abasempilweni.
Oko akuthethi ukuba kufuneka womelele emzimbeni, ukwimo entle yengqondo, kwaye ungaze ube noxinzelelo! Kuthetha nje ukuba nobabini kufuneka nenze ixesha lokujonga nina kunye nokuziphucula.
Unokuyazi kakuhle imiba yokuzibophelela onayo, umzekelo, engazukulunga ngokuzibophelela komnye umntu. Endaweni yoko, ungaqhubeka nokuzisebenzela, ukhangele iingcebiso ukujongana nezona zinto zibangela le ngxaki, kwaye usebenzise olo tshintsho kubudlelwane bakho.
Kukho ezinye izinto ofuna ukusebenzela ngaphandle kolwalamano. Mhlawumbi unexhala elinokuthi lichaphazele ulwalamano lwakho. Nokuba yeyiphi indlela, kubalulekile kwimpilo-ntle yakho ukuba usebenzele ukuyinciphisa.
Kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba uzive unenkululeko yokwenza oku, kwaye unenkxaso evela kwiqabane lakho ukuze ubone. Kungenxa yokuba injongo ayichaphazeli ngqo ubudlelwane, oko akuthethi ukuba ubudlelwane mabungabi yinxalenye yokufikelela usukelo!
Ngokulinganayo, iqabane lakho linokufuna ukugxila kwinjongo yabo. Kwakhona, baxhase, kwaye uvume ukubaluleka kwayo kubo.
Ngokuthatha ixesha lokusebenza kuni, niyabonisana ukuba niyakwazi ukuthatha uxanduva ngezenzo zenu.
Oku kukwabonisa ukuba uzimisele ukubeka iinzame ezifunekayo ukwenza ulwalamano lusebenze. Kwakhona, le yeyona nto iya kwenza ubudlelwane bakho bume kuvavanyo lwexesha, nayo nayiphi na eminye imiceli mngeni ojamelana nayo.
Ubudlelwane obomeleleyo benziwe ngabantu abomeleleyo, ke jolisa ekuya kweli nqanaba njengabantu abahlukeneyo ukuze womelele kunye.
4. Misela kwaye uhloniphe imida.
Ukuba ufuna ukwenza ubudlelwane obunempilo, kufuneka kubekho imida ethile.
Yenza ixesha lokuthetha ngale nto kunye neqabane lakho kwangethuba, okanye xa usondela kwinqanaba elilandelayo, njenge ukuhamba kunye .
Ukuba usandula ukuthandana, ungacwangcisa imida ejikeleze ukungabinakho-oko kunokuba kukuba akukho namnye kuni uthandana nabanye abantu, okanye ucime ii -apps zokuthandana kwiifowuni zakho. Lo ngumda olula kakhulu, kwaye yindlela yakho yokuthi ufuna ukuzibophelela kwelinye inqanaba.
Unokufuna ukuqinisekisa ukuba nobabini nigcina ubomi benu buhamba, njengoko besesitshilo. Olu hlobo lomda lunokuvakala ngathi, 'Ibhola ekhatywayo ngolwe-Lwesibini ibaluleke kakhulu kum, kwaye ndifuna ukuhlala ndizimisele kuloo nto.'
Lo ngumda ofanelekileyo wokucebisa, kwaye ikwabonisa iqabane lakho ukuba uthatha ukuzibophelela ngokungathí sina!
Iyabazisa ukuba uyazihlonipha nawe-ingakhathaza njani into yokuba umntu alahle yonke into (kubandakanya into ebekade eyenza ngeveki kule minyaka ilishumi idlulileyo) kuwe?
Inomtsalane xa umntu ekhathalele into eyoneleyo ukuba angazibophelela kuyo, ke kuya kufuneka ubenembeko kunye nokuncoma iqabane lakho ukuba bacebisa umda ofanayo kubo.
Imida onokufuna ukuyimisela kamva ezantsi emgceni inokuba malunga nendawo yakho. Mhlawumbi uyathanda ukuhambahamba ngexesha lengxabano ukucoca intloko, kodwa iqabane lakho liyayithiya kwaye lifuna ukukhupha nje ingxabano endleleni.
Umda apha unokuvakala ngathi uthi, 'Ngamanye amaxesha, ndifuna indawo ethe xhaxhe ukuze ndikwazi ukuzibophelela ekusombululeni le ngxaki.'
Oku kubonisa ukuba uyabuhlonipha ubudlelwane kwaye ufuna ukubenza busebenze. Iyabazisa ukuba uyenza le nto ngenxa yabo, kuba uyakhathala, kwaye awubashiyi okanye ungxamile kuba uhluthi.
Khumbula ukuba baya kubona izenzo zakho ngokwahlukileyo ngamanye amaxesha, ke kunokuba luncedo ukucacisa ukuba kutheni usenza le nto uyenzayo. Le yindlela elungileyo yokubazisa malunga nento oyifunayo, kwaye ungabamema ukuba bakuxelele bona imbuyekezo.
Khumbula ukuba basenokufuna ukucebisa imida- usenokungabathandi ekuqaleni, kodwa kufanelekile ukuba babe nembeko kwaye bamamele.
Umzekelo, umda wabo usenokuba kukuba ungahambi ngefowuni yabo. Musa ukutsiba kwizigqibo kwaye ucinge ukuba bayakukhohlisa. Banike ithuba lokuba bachaze ukuba kutheni le nto ibalulekile kubo- mhlawumbi babenomlawuli olawulayo owayexakekile, kwaye into abayifunayo yinkululeko nokuzithemba.
Ngokubanika ithuba lokuchaza ukubaluleka kwemida yabo, ubabonisa ukuba uyakhathala kwaye uyabahlonipha. Nobabini nivulelana ngakumbi, nto leyo enokuqinisa uxhulumaniso lweemvakalelo ngakumbi.
Ukunyaniseka ngakumbi kunokubakho malunga neemfuno zakho, ulungelelwaniso olungcono onokuthi ulwenze kwaye ubudlelwane bakho buba sempilweni.
5. Sebenzela iinjongo kunye nokucwangcisa ikamva.
Enye yeendlela ezilungileyo zokugcina ubudlelwane busempilweni kwaye buzinzile kukuzibophelela kwiinjongo kunye.
Inyaniso yokuba nenza izicwangciso zexesha elizayo kunye iya kuninceda nobabini nizive nikhuselekile kubudlelwane.
Ukuba nento ojolise kuyo ekunyanzeleni ukuba nihlangane kwaye nisebenze ngenkuthalo ukufumana izisombululo kuyo nayiphi na imiceli mngeni enijongene nayo.
Uyakuziva womelele kwaye ufeze ngakumbi njengesibini ukuba unento ofuna ukuyisebenzela, kuba uya kuba nezinto zokumakisha kuluhlu lwezinto oza kuzenza.
Seta iintlobo ezahlukeneyo zeenjongo- njengokugcina indawo yokuhlala kunye, ukubhukisha iholide, kokubini ukuzilolonga, njl njl.
Umzekelo, ukugcinela indawo yokuhlala kunye kuya kukhuthaza ukudibana okungakumbi. Uya kwabelana ngemincili yenyathelo elilandelayo kubudlelwane bakho, kwaye nobabini nisebenzele kule nto kunye.
Ukusebenza kwinjongo ebonakalayo kuya kukutyhala ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo, kwaye uya kujongana nemiceli mngeni kunye. Ukusebenza kunye kulungile kulwalamano lwakho, njengoko ufumana ukwaneliseka kwangoko kwaye unokubhiyozela iimpumelelo apha endleleni. Umzekelo, ukutyhoboza ukuzilolonga kukunika zombini iphezulu ngephanyazo (enkosi kula ma-endorphin), xa kuthelekiswa nokonga indlu, ongasayi kuzuza kuyo kangangeenyanga, ukuba ayingunyaka okanye emibini!
Hlanganisa iinjongo zakho, zibophelele ekusebenzeni kunye kunye, kwaye wenze ixesha lokubhiyozela impumelelo yakho apha endleleni.
ukuba wenzeni xa umntu erhoxa
6. Yenza ukulalanisa.
Inxalenye yalo naluphi na ulwalamano olusempilweni, ukwenza ukulalanisa isitshixo ukuba ufuna ukwakha into ehlala ihleli.
Oku akuthethi ukuba wena okanye iqabane lakho uhlala ufumana eyakho indlela, okanye nokuba omnye wenu kufuneka azincame kakhulu kwaye abe lusizi.
Endaweni yoko, oko kuthetha ukuba uyazibophelela ekubeni nolwalamano oluhle kwaye wamkele ukuba kuya kufuneka uhlangane embindini ngamanye amaxesha.
Kulungile ukuthetha malunga nokuba loluphi uhlobo lokulalanisa enivakalelwa kukuba nobabini luya kuba luncedo, njengoko ninokwenza ngemida enifuna ukuyiphumeza.
Kunokubakho ezinye izinto ekungekhe kuthethathethwane ngazo kuwe, ekufuneka uzimisele phambili kwangoko malunga noku ukuze ulunge. Ukuba uyazi ukuba awunakuze ube nobudlelwane nomnye umntu wenkolo okanye ukholo olwahlukileyo kuwe, okanye awuyi kubanaye umntu otya iziyobisi, kuya kufuneka unyaniseke malunga noku ngokukhawuleza ukuze uphephe ukumosha zombini ixesha.
Kwezinye izinto okhululeke ngazo, kusabalulekile ukubonisa indlela oziva ngayo. Ukuba awunyanisekanga malunga nento oyifunayo okanye oyilindeleyo, awusoze wonwabe- iqabane lakho alikwazi ukufunda ingqondo yakho!
Thatha ixesha lokuchaza indlela oziva ngayo nokuba kutheni izinto ezithile zibaluleke kangaka kuwe, kwaye bavulele ukuba benze okufanayo.
Zilungiselele ukuba babe nezimvo ezichaseneyo nawe, kwaye uzole ngelixa ufumana umhlaba ophakathi. Le ayisiyiyo 'tit for tat' ukhuphiswano, kodwa kufanelekile ukuthi, 'Ndiye ndalalanisa koku ngenxa yenu, kwaye ndingavuya ukuba nicinge ngokuyekelela koku.'
Akufanele kube malunga nomntu 'onetyala' lomnye umntu nantoni na, okanye malunga nokukhubekisa omnye komnye ukuya ngokuchasene neenqobo zakho! Kufanele ukuba kube malunga nonxibelelwano oluthembekileyo kunye nezivumelwano zabantu abadala.
Isizathu sokuba oku kungundoqo ekwenzeni ubudlelwane busebenze kuba icwangcisa yonke into etafileni. Akukho ndawo yokudideka okanye ityala ukuba nobabini niyazi ukuba nimi phi kwimiba enokuba yimpikiswano okanye inamatye.
7. Zibophelela kwixesha elisemgangathweni.
Uninzi lwethu lunikezela ngobusuku bomhla xa sikubudlelwane bexesha elide. Sichitha ixesha elininzi kunye neqabane lethu, kwaye sikhe sathandana ngaphandle kwendlela, ke… kutheni uzihlupha?
Ewe, igcina ukuthandana kuphila, enye! Ngokuzibophelela kumhla wokuhlwa okanye ukubeka ixesha bodwa ukuba nichithe kunye nisenza into eyonwabisayo okanye enithandanayo, niyabonisana ukuba niyakhathala.
Utyalole ubudlelwane kwaye ufuna iqabane lakho lazi ukuba ulixabise kangakanani- kwaye kuyathandeka ukwazi ukuba nabo bayakuxabisa!
Ubomi bunokuba buhle ngokwendalo, nokuba ukubo budlelwane basendle nanini na. Kuya kuhlala kukho imigqomo engenanto, izitya zokuhlamba, kunye namatyala ekufuneka ehlelwe. Kulula kakhulu ukutyibilika kwisiqhelo kwaye ngandlela thile ungene kwiingxoxo malunga nokuba ngubani olala abantwana, okanye kutheni isidlo sangokuhlwa singakulungelanga ukubuya kwakho emsebenzini.
Ngokujolisa kwixesha elisemgangathweni kwaye ulongeze kwiikhalenda zakho, uyazibophelela kukonwabela ixesha-lesibini apho ungengomama okanye utata, umsebenzi okanye umphathi, abantu ababini abathandanayo.
Ikwabonelela ngozinzo kunye nokhuseleko kuni nobabini. Ukuba uhlala uxakekile kodwa iqabane lakho alikho, umzekelo (nokuba kungokusebenza okanye amaqela obuhlobo njl.), Banokukhathazeka ukuba awunaxesha laneleyo labo. Banokuba behleli ekhaya beziva bengamalolo okanye belahliwe ngelixa usiya kubona elinye iqela labahlobo kusasa, kwaye elinye emva kwemini - okanye ngokuchaseneyo!
Nokuba yeyiphi indlela, ukuba nobabini niphila ngeendlela ezahlukileyo zokuphila, omnye wenu unokuba nexhala lokuba akusayi kubakho xesha laneleyo libekelwe bucala ukonwabela ukuba sisibini.
Kutheni ndinemicimbi yokuthemba
Ngokuzibophelela kwixesha elisemgangathweni kunye, niyazisa omnye nomnye ukuba nenza inzame kuba niyakhathala. Ukwazi ukuba ba ndiza kuthanda ukukubona isidlo sangokuhlwa kabini ngeveki, umzekelo, kuya kwenza ukuba iqabane lakho lizive likhuselekile- banento ekufuneka bejonge phambili kuyo, banento emiselweyo, kwaye baziva ngathi uyazixabisa kwaye uziqwalasele.
8. Musa ukoyika ukungavumelani.
'Ulwalamano olugqibeleleyo' esilubonayo kwimidlalo yeTV okanye kwimiboniso bhanyabhanya kubonakala ngathi ijolise kubantu ababini abaqhuba kakuhle ngokumangalisayo. Mhlawumbi kuhle kakhulu…
Izibini ziyaxabana! Kwaye oko kuqhelekile kwaye isempilweni . Kuqala, ingaba ubomi buya kukruqula njani ukuba niyavumelana ngokoqobo kuyo yonke into? Ubungayi kuba neengxoxo ezinkulu, ngekhe ubone ngenene indlela iqabane lakho elithanda ngayo xa likhusela into eliyithandayo, kwaye uyifumene intle kwaye iqikeleleke.
Ukugcina ubudlelwane busempilweni kunye nokusebenza, eneneni kubaluleke kakhulu ukuphikisana ngamanye amaxesha. Ukwahluka kwezimvo kubonisa ukuba unyanisekile malunga nendlela oziva ngayo, kwaye oko kubaluleke kakhulu kwimpilo yakho yengqondo kunye nokukuqonda kwabo kunye neminqweno yakho.
Ukuba nobabini niyavumelana ngalo lonke ixesha, omnye wenu kusenokwenzeka ukuba uyaxoka - kwaye oko kuyakhathaza ngenxa yezizathu ezininzi.
Basenokuba bayaxoka kuba banqwenela ukukukholisa kwaye bacinga ukuba ukuzifihla ukuba bangoobani kanye, kwaye uhamba nayo nantoni na oyithethayo, yeyona ndlela yokwenza oko.
Okanye bayaxoka kuba baziva bengakhululekanga ukuvakalisa indlela abavakalelwa ngayo ngokunyanisekileyo, oko kunokuthetha ukuba bathule cwaka benomsindo kwaye bacinezele umsindo.
Nokuba yeyiphi na indlela, ukuba nengxoxo edlamkileyo okanye ukuba nomsindo ngamanye amaxesha akuyonto imbi! Ngapha koko, uhlala usenza umahluko phakathi kobudlelwane obusempilweni obusebenzayo, kunye nobudlelwane obungonwabisiyo obuya nokwahlukana…
Zama nje umlo olungileyo , kuba ungquzulwano kubudlelwane lunokuba sempilweni okanye lungabinampilo kuxhomekeke kwindlela omabini amaqabane ahamba ngayo.
Khumbula ukuba bonke ubudlelwane buhamba ngamahla ndenyuka, ngoko ke ukwenza ezi zinto akunako 'ukulungisa' nantoni na ngobusuku obunye. Ngokuzibophelela kutshintsho lwexesha elide, nangona kunjalo, utyala imali kwiqabane lakho nakubudlelwane bakho, kwaye kunokwenzeka ukuba ubone uphuculo lokwenyani.
Ngokulinganayo, ayizizo zonke ubudlelwane eziya kuhlala ngonaphakade, kwaye oko kulungile ukuvuma nokwamkela, nokuba kubuhlungu okanye koyikisa kangakanani na. Ngamanye amaxesha, nobabini ninokunika yonke into kubudlelwane kwaye ayisebenzi nje. Oko kunokuba kungenxa yokuba imiceli mngeni mikhulu kakhulu ukuba yoyiswe, okanye ngenxa yokuba ixesha alilunganga, omnye wenu unemicimbi yobuqu ekufuneka beyijongile ngokwabo, okanye kungenxa yokuba bekungafunekiyo ukuba ihlale.
Ngaba awuqinisekanga ukuba ungenza njani ukuba ubudlelwane bakho busebenze? Ngaba unemicimbi efuna ukulungiswa? Thetha kwi-Intanethi kwingcali yobudlelwane kwi-Relationship Hero enokukunceda ufumane izinto. Ngokulula.
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