Ngubani ongathandi ukuba ubudlelwane babo bomelele kwaye basempilweni?
Ngubani ongathandi ukuziva malunga kwaye ndikhuselekile phakathi ubudlelwane babo?
Ngubani ongafuniyo ukugcina ubudlelwane obuhamba nothando nolonwabo ukuze luhlale luvavanyo lwexesha?
Zonke ezi zinto zinokwenzeka.
Unokwenza ubuhlobo bakho bomelele.
Nantsi indlela…
1. Yiba ngokukhululekileyo uvuleke emngciphekweni.
Kulula ukugcina iingcinga kunye neemvakalelo zethu kuthi kunokuba sibeke emngciphekweni wokuzityhila komnye umntu.
Kodwa iqabane lakho alikho nje umntu omdala.
Ngoyena mntu ubakhethileyo ukuba ubathande kwaye uthandwe ngabo.
Ndidikiwe ndenzeni
Ukuba kukho nabani na omele ukuziva ekwazi ukwabelana naye ngaphakathi, ngabo.
Oko kusenokuthetha ukubaxelela ukuba ubathanda kangakanani xa ingeyonto uyivakalisa ngokuphandle.
Isenokuthetha ukuxoxa ngoloyiko lwakho okanye inkxalabo kunye nabo-hayi malunga nobudlelwane bakho kuphela, kodwa ngobomi bakho, umsebenzi, impilo (ngokwasemzimbeni nangokwasemzimbeni), okanye enye into.
Unxibelelwano lweemvakalelo olunokuthi lwenziwe ngokuvuleleka okukhulu kunye nokuba sesichengeni alunakuthathelwa phantsi.
Inqaku elidibeneyo: Iindlela ezi-7 zokuba sesichengeni ngokweemvakalelo kubudlelwane
2. Gxila kwiimpazamo zakho, kwaye unxibelelane nezi.
Izibonelelo zakho zokuba sesichengeni kukuba uzimisele ngakumbi ukuvuma ezakho iimpazamo.
Ukubanakho ukujonga ngokunyaniseka nangokuthe ngqo kuwe nakwindlela oziphethe ngayo kwaye ubone apho unokuba ngumthombo wentlungu okanye umsindo, unokwenza imimangaliso kulwalamano lwakho.
Ngequbuliso, endaweni yokubona iqabane lakho lingunobangela wazo zonke iingxaki onokuthi ube nazo, uyakwazi ukubona indima oyidlalayo kubo.
Kodwa eyona ngenelo yokuba neempazamo zakho kukuba, ngokunxibelelana neqabane lakho, ukhawulezisa uzilungiselele izixhobo.
Endaweni yokuziva behlaselwa kwaye ukuthanda kwabo kuncitshiswa, baya kuziva benyanzelekile ukuba bajonge indlela abaziphethe ngayo kwaye babone apho banokuthi bakwazi ukutshintsha babengcono.
Unokwenza umjikelo ophumeleleyo wokuwina ophumeleleyo njengesibini ukuba uthathe inyathelo lokuphucula ubudlelwane bakho.
Inqaku elikhawulezayo: akufuneki uzive ngathi kufuneka uthathe uxanduva kuphela naziphi na iingxaki kubudlelwane bakho. Oku ngakumbi malunga nokuzimisela ukuthatha uxanduva ekwabelwana ngalo kunye nendlela onokuthi ufikelele ngayo kuloo ndawo.
3. Gxila kubuhle beqabane lakho, kwaye unxibelelane ngezi.
Ngoku ukuba uyakwazi ukujonga ngakumbi iziphene zakho, lixesha lokuba ugxile kuwo onke amanqaku alungileyo malunga neqabane lakho.
Xa konke onokucinga ngako zizinto abazenzayo ezikucaphukisayo okanye ezikucaphukisayo, ulwenza buthathaka unxibelelwano lweemvakalelo olubaluleke kakhulu kulwalamano olusempilweni.
Kodwa ngokujonga zonke ezo zinto uzithandayo malunga neqabane lakho, uyomeleza olo manyano.
Kwaye ngokunxibelelana neziqabane lakho ezi zinto, ubenza bazive bexatyiswa.
Ukhulisa ukuzithemba kwabo kunye nokuzixabisa kwabo.
Kwaye xa baziva ngathi uyabaqaphela kwaye uyabaxabisa ukuba bangobani kwaye zonke izinto abazenzayo-ezinkulu nezincinci-baya kwenza inzame ezingakumbi zokuqhubeka nokubonisa ezo zinto zilungileyo.
Inqaku elidibeneyo: Iindlela ezingama-30 eziQhelekileyo zokubonisa uxabiso lwakho kwiQabane lakho
4. Zama ukubona ukungqubana ngokwembono yeqabane lakho.
Amanqaku amathathu okuqala kolu luhlu abenomxholo ophantsi onokuthi uqaphele: uvelwano.
Abantu abohlukeneyo banokuba namandla ahlukeneyo ovelwano, kodwa, kubudlelwane, yimeko yokuba ngcono.
Kwaye enye yeendlela eziphambili zokusebenzisa uvelwano ekwenzeni ubudlelwane bakho bomelele yindima eyidlalayo kwimbambano.
Uvelwano lukuvumela ukuba ungene kwizicathulo zeqabane lakho kwaye ubone izinto ngendlela abazibona ngayo.
Ngokwenza njalo, unokunceda ekuthomalaliseni imvakalelo yokugula onokuba nayo kubo kubushushu bomzuzwana.
Ngelixa ungquzulwano olusempilweni kwaye lunokukunceda ukuba nikhule kunye njengesibini, luluvelwano oluya kubonelela ngezakha-mzimba kolo khulo.
Uvelwano luyakukunceda ubone izisombululo zokungavumelani kwakho umntu anokuzibamba kumsindo wakhe angakuboni.
5. Yenze icace iminqweno yakho, kodwa funda ukulalanisa.
Kulungile ukufuna izinto ezithile kwiqabane lakho.
Yi ayilunganga Ukulindela ukuba bavumelane okanye babonelele ngazo zonke ezo zinto.
Ngamnye uneminqweno yakhe, iindlela zakho zokwenza izinto, kunye nemigca yakho ebomvu.
Kuya kufuneka unxibelelane ngokucacileyo ngento ongathanda ukuba uyenze kwiqabane lakho nakubudlelwane bakho, kodwa kufuneka uzimisele ukulalanisa.
ungahlala njani utshatile xa ungonwabanga
Ukulalanisa kulwalamano ayisiyi sayina ukuba awuhambelani kunye neqabane lakho.
Kungumqondiso wokuba kukho iindawo apho Umahluko wakho kufuneka usetyenzwe.
Mhlawumbi ungathanda ukuba nesidlo sasemini sangeCawa nabazali bakho veki nganye kuba yile nto ubusoloko uyenza.
Kodwa loo nto ingalindeleka kakhulu kwiqabane lakho kwangoko- okanye nanini na.
Unokufumana umhlaba ophakathi apho uya khona rhoqo emva kweveki okanye ukuba uhamba wedwa ngamanye amaxesha.
Kulungile.
Ngethuba nje ucacile kwinto oyifunayo kwaye bacacile malunga nokonwaba kwabo, kuya kufuneka ubenakho ukufikelela kwisivumelwano.
6. Funda ulwimi lothando lomlingane wakho.
Ungabonisa kwaye unxibelelane nothando lwakho ngendlela eyahlukileyo kwiqabane lakho.
Ukuba kunjalo, mhlawumbi uthetha okwahlukileyo thanda iilwimi .
Iphuhliswe nguGqirha Gary Chapman, zinxulumene nendlela esithanda ukubonisa ngayo nokwamkela uthando kwabanye.
Ziyi-5 xa zizonke:
- Amagama okuvuma
Ixesha lomgangatho kunye
Ukubamba okwasemzimbeni
- Imisebenzi yenkonzo
- Ukwamkela izipho
Ngelixa wena neqabane lakho kungafuneki nibelane ngolwimi olunye lothando ukuze ugcine ubudlelwane bakho bomelele, kuyanceda ukuqonda ukuba uthetha luphi ulwimi.
Ngokwazi eyona nto yenza iqabane lakho liziva lithandwa, ungazibeka phambili ezo zinto kunokuba unakho cinga bayafuna.
Ukuba baziva bekhazimla ngokufudumeleyo nanini na ubenzela izinto ungakhange ucelwe, zama ukwenza ngakumbi koku.
amadoda ayarhoxa xa ethandana
Ukuba ubuso babo buyakhanya xa ubathenga into encinci (okanye enkulu) into ephindaphindiweyo, yigcine engqondweni kwaye ucinge ngento onokuyifumana enokuyenza ukuba ibe lusuku lwabo.
7. Cwangcisanani ixesha njengesibini.
Nokuba ayilulo ulwimi oluthandayo nokuba loluphi kuni olubeka phambili, ukuchitha ixesha elinomgangatho kunye kubalulekile ukuba kubudlelwane obomeleleyo nobusempilweni.
Kwakhona, ibuyela kunxibelelwano lweemvakalelo owabelana ngalo kunye novelwano oziva ngalo omnye komnye.
Ukuba uhlala njengeenqanawa ezimbini ezidlulayo ebusuku, kuya kusiba lula ngakumbi ukuba iimvakalelo zakho omnye komnye ziphele.
Isenzo sokukrola ixesha elithile njengesibini sisikhumbuza ngendlela enonwabisana ngayo kunye.
Ngelixa umgangatho welo xesha ubaluleke kakhulu, kunjalo ke ngobuninzi ukuya kuthi ga kwinqanaba elithile.
Umhla omnye wokuthandana kwisikhumbuzo sakho okanye uSuku lweValentine awuzukuyinqumlela uninzi lwezibini.
Kuya kufuneka uzame ukucwangcisa ngohlobo oluthile lwamava ekwabelwana ngawo ubuncinci kube kanye ngenyanga ukuba unako.
8. Gcina ukubamba ngokwasemzimbeni rhoqo kangangoko unako.
Kwakhona, ngelixa wena okanye iqabane lakho ningenako ukuchukumisa ulwimi lwenu oluphambili, kubalulekile nangona kunjalo.
Ukuthinta ngokwasemzimbeni yindlela elula nekhawulezayo yokuthinta iimvakalelo.
Ukumanga okulula kunokudiliza imiqobo ekusenokwenzeka ukuba uyakhe emva komlo, umzekelo.
Kodwa akufuneki ube ungqubana neqabane lakho ukuze amandla ochukumiso abe nefuthe.
Ukuthinta imihla ngemihla ngendlela enye okanye enye akunakugcina kuphela ubudlelwane bemvakalelo, kunokwenza imimangaliso yezona zinto zisondele kubudlelwane bakho.
Ukuthinta kuzisa ukuqheleka kunye nokuqhelana kunceda ukukhulula uxinzelelo kunye noxinzelelo olunokuthi luhambisane nesondo ngaxa lithile kubudlelwane babini.
9. Yamkela ukuba amahla ndenyuka awaphepheki.
Alukho ulwalamano olugqibeleleyo ngalo lonke ixesha.
Ngelixa ezinye zinokuba nesiphithiphithi kunabanye, lonke ulwalamano luya kuba phezulu kwaye lows.
Ngokwamkela ukuba le yindlela yendalo yezinto, uyakuphepha ukwenza intlekele xa izinto zingahambi kakuhle.
Impikiswano-nokuba ngumtya wempikiswano- akufuneki ukuba kuthetha ukuba ukwahlukana akunakuphepheka.
Ngokuqinisekileyo, kunokuthetha ukuba kukho umsebenzi ekufuneka wenziwe ukulungisa nokulungisa ezinye zeentlungu ezikhoyo, kodwa ayisosiphelo sehlabathi.
Ngaphandle kwengxabano, iimvakalelo zinokuphuma kwaye zibaleke kubudlelwane njengoko iimpembelelo zezinye iinxalenye zobomi zivakala.
Uxinzelelo lomsebenzi kunye nosapho, iingxaki zempilo, imeko jikelele zehlabathi-zonke ezi zinokuba nefuthe kubudlelwane bakho.
Ukufunda ukukhwela le rollercoaster kubalulekile ekwenzeni ubudlelwane bomelele kwaye bomelele ngakumbi.
10. Qonda ukuba lonke ubudlelwane buhamba nexesha.
Kunye namahla ndinyuka obudlelane, kuza indaleko yendalo yokuba olo lwalamano luthetha ntoni.
Ekuqaleni, kunokuthetha ukwamkela uvuyo olucocekileyo lokudityaniswa ngokutsha.
Oko kunokujika kube yimincili yokujonga phambili kubomi kunye.
Okulandelayo, kugxilwe kubudlelwane kungaphendukela kwimicimbi esebenzayo ngakumbi yokuthenga ikhaya kunye nokutshata (ukuba yile nto niyifunayo nobabini).
Usapho lunokuza ngokulandelayo kwaye ubudlelwane bakho buya kudinga ukuziqhelanisa ukuze buquke zonke izipho kunye nemiceli mngeni ekuboniswayo.
Kwaye njengoko niguga kunye, ninokufumanisa ukuba ubuhlobo enibabelana ngabo buyeyona nto ibaluleke kakhulu kuni nobabini.
Uyabona, njengobomi, ubudlelwane abuzange bume bume.
Iya kuhlala ikho ukuhlangabezana neemfuno eziguqukayo zobomi kwaye ngamnye kuni njengesibini.
Ukuluqonda kunye nokwamkela olu tshintsho kuthetha ukuba ubudlelwane bakho buya kuhlala bomelele kulo lonke.
11. Buza ukuba ungenza ntoni kwiqabane lakho.
Ngokuqhelekileyo usuku luhamba apho ungeke usebenzise uncedo oluncinci ngento ethile.
Kuyafana nakwiqabane lakho.
ungajongana njani nentombi engenambulelo
Ke, ngaphandle nangaphandle, unokucela ukuba ukwazi ukwenza ntoni ukuze uthabathe uxinzelelo oluvakalayo.
Ungababuza ukuba yintoni, ngokukodwa, onokuyenza ukunceda.
Kwaye unokucinga ngeendlela onokuthi ukhulule kuzo uxinzelelo abanokuthi babe phantsi kwalo.
Ezi zenzo zincinci zomeleza ubudlelwane ngeendlela ezininzi.
Okokuqala, ngokuthomalalisa ezinye zeengxaki ezinokuba nzima ezingqondweni zabo, nenza ukuba nizole kwaye nibe noxinzelelo lwendawo eninokuhlala kuyo nobabini.
Okwesibini, uyababonisa ukuba ababodwa kwaye kungathenjelwa kubo ukuba ubancede xa bekufuna.
Okwesithathu, wenza iqela lokucinga elinokuxhobisa nina nobabini ukuba nibubone ubudlelwane obuqinisekileyo kwaye nisebenze kunye.
Inqaku elikhawulezayo: sukuphambanisa ukunceda iqabane lakho xa liyidinga ngokubenzela yonke into kwaye ube ngumasethi womnyango.
12. Cwangcisa iinjongo zobomi bakho kunye nolwalamano lwakho.
Ikamva kunye nawo onke amandla alo yinto enomdla.
Kwaye olu lonwabo lungasetyenziselwa ukwenza ubudlelwane bakho bomelele.
Ngokumisela iinjongo kunye namaphupha ngekamva uya kwabelana kunye, wenza amandla aqinisekileyo enokungena kubudlelwane bakho.
Ngelixa ukonwaba kwakho kunye akufuneki kuxhomekeke ekufezekiseni zonke iinjongo ozibekele zona, xa nisabelana ngohambo kunye kwaye niphumelele kwinto ethile njengesibini, oko kunokudala ubudlelwane obunzulu kunye obuhlala buhleli.
Iinjongo zinokukunceda ubone ubudlelwane bakho ukuba buyintoni kanye kanye: intsebenziswano.
Uyakuqonda ukuba izinto zisebenza kakuhle xa omabini amaqela esebenza ngokudibeneyo, endaweni yokuya kwelinye icala.
Cwangcisa iinjongo ezahlukeneyo, ezinye zincinci kwaye ziyalawuleka, ezinye zinomceli mngeni ngakumbi, kwaye inye okanye ezimbini 'zenyanga' iinjongo ezibonisa ukuzimisela okukhulu.
Kwaye khumbula ukuba luhambo hayi indawo ekuya kuyo eyona nto ibalulekileyo.
13. Gcina ubomi bakho.
Ukuthi ubudlelwane obomeleleyo bahlala buxhomekeke ekuchitheni ixesha bodwa kunokuvakala kungangqinelani.
Kodwa ngenene uyancedakala ngokugcina uhlobo oluthile lokwahlula ebomini bakho.
Okokuqala, ikunika into onokuthetha ngayo. Ukuba uhlala uhlala kunye, incoko inokuthi ivele yomile.
Okwesibini, ukuba nezinto ozithandayo okanye ukuzibophelela kunika isithuba esidinga ukuphefumla ubudlelwane.
Awuyi kuziva uchukunyiswa liqabane lakho ukuba uyakwazi ukuphuma kubo ngoku kwaye kwakhona.
Okwesithathu, kuncinci indawo yengqumbo ukuba wena neqabane lakho niyakwazi ukuqhubeka nokulandela izinto ezibalulekileyo kuni.
Kuya kufuneka unikezele ngezinto ezithile xa niza kuba sisibini, ngakumbi njengoko ubudlelwane buba bukhulu.
iimpawu zokutsala ngokwesini kumfazi
Kodwa ukuba unako ukugcina ezo zinto zibaluleke kakhulu kuwe, uya kufumana ukulinganisela okuhle ebomini bakho kunye.
Ngaba ufuna ingcebiso ethe kratya yokwenza ubudlelwane bakho bomelele? Thetha kwi-Intanethi kwingcali yobudlelwane kwi-Relationship Hero enokukunceda ufumane izinto. Ngokulula.
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