Andiqondi ukuba nawuphina umntu onomdla kwabanye abantu unokubanga ukuba akazange azive enexhala kubudlelwane, kodwa ubudlelwane boxinzelelo buthatha izinto ziye kwelinye inqanaba.
Yintoni na, ngokuchanekileyo?
Sisiphumo esithe ngqo sokuziva ungakhuselekanga kubudlelwane bakho. Unexhala malunga nazo zonke iintlobo zezinto ezinokuchaphazela kakubi okanye ukuphelisa ubudlelwane bakho.
Ukuba unamava amabi kwixesha elidlulileyo, ingqondo yakho iya kuba ifunde ukuphendula kubo ngendlela ethile kwaye ulindele iipatheni zokuziphindaphinda.
Unokuhlala kunye namanqanaba aqhubekayo oxinzelelo malunga nolwalamano lwakho, okanye izinto ezincinci, ezibonakala ngathi azibalulekanga ezinokubangela amaza alo. Uyazithandabuza kwaye uyazithandabuza iimvakalelo zeqabane lakho kuwe.
Ukuba ucinga ukuba le nto uhlangabezana nayo inokuba luxinzelelo lobudlelwane, le miqondiso yokuxelwa kufuneka ikuncede ubone ukuba ngaba le yingxaki kuwe.
1. Uyakholelwa Ukuba Isiphelo Sikufuphi
Nokuba ubudlelwane bakho buhamba kakuhle kangakanani, awunako ukutshintsha imvakalelo ekhathazayo yokuba konke malunga nokuhamba kancinci 'iTitanic' kwaye ubethe i-iceberg ngaphambi kokutshona nawe ebhodini.
Nokuba ukungavisisani okungabalulekanga phakathi kwakho neqabane lakho isisu sakho siyaphakuzela luloyiko lokuba amathuba akho okonwaba ngonaphakade abe sele elungile kwaye elume ngokwenene uthuli.
2. Unomona
Umona yimvakalelo esemgangathweni elungileyo, kodwa akukho buhlobo bunokuphila ukuba buyaphuma esandleni.
Ukubonisa iimpawu zekhwele akuyi kuthetha ukuba iqabane lakho liza kutshintsha indlela abaziphethe ngayo, kwaye lisenokubatyhalela kude. Kodwa ukuba kukho into enye ngokuqinisekileyo, kukuba ngokuqinisekileyo iya kukwenza ube lusizi.
wwe aj izimbo zomxholo wengoma
Ukuba uye wangcatshwa kwixa elidlulileyo, akumangalisi ukuba uba nomona , kodwa ngokuqinisekileyo iya kukwenza uxhalabe.
3. Uyalawula
Uxinzelelo lwakho luthetha ukuba unqwenela ukulawula ubudlelwane bakho ukuze uyeke ukwenzakala. Uziva ngathi ukuba unesiphatho ngqo malunga nokuba kuqhubeka ntoni yonke into izakulunga.
4. Uhlala kakhulu
Ingangathi iyaphikisana, kodwa enye indlela olawula ngayo izinto kukusoloko uhamba imayile eyongezelelweyo ukonwabisa iqabane lakho kwaye ube ngumntu ocinga ukuba bafuna ukuba ube.
Ngale ndlela, abanakuba nezizathu ezifanelekileyo zokubheyila kulwalamano. Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, bafumana into abayifunayo ngalo lonke ixesha, ke yintoni enokukhalaza ngayo?
5. Uyathandabuza Ukuzibophelela
Le nto iphela malunga nokuzikhusela. Ngelixa kubonakala kungenangqondo konke konke, usenokuba mathidala ukuthoba iindonga zakho zokuzikhusela kwaye uthathe amanyathelo obudlelwane obuqatha.
Oku kunokuba kungenxa yokuba usoyika ukuba ubudlelwane buza kuphela kwaye awufuni kuzibekela indawo evulekileyo yokwenzakala.
Mhlawumbi utshisiwe xa sele uzibophelele emntwini Kwixesha elidlulileyo, kwaye oku kuyondla ixhala lakho ngoku.
6. Uyabuza ukuhambelana kwakho
Ngokunxulumene ngokusondeleyo nokuzibophelela kwakho kwi-phobia, uzama ukufumana izizathu zokuba kutheni wena neqabane lakho nilula ayihambelani .
Ngamanye amaxesha, izinto oza nazo zincinci kangangokuba zinokoyiswa ngokulula, kodwa wena awuziboni zinjalo. Ubabona njengezigcayiseli zilindele nje ukunyathelwa.
(Ewe kunjalo, ixhala lakho linokusekwa kwiyantlukwano yokwenyani enokubonisa ukuba inkulu kakhulu ukuba ingaxolelaniswa neenkolelo ezimalunga nomtshato okanye abantwana okanye apho ufuna ukuhlala khona ekuhambeni kwexesha. eli nqaku lixoxa ikakhulu.)
7. Uba Nomsindo
Uhlala usengozini, oko kuthetha ukuba kulula kuwe ukuba uphelelwe ngumsindo xa kukho into eyenzekayo ebangela uxinzelelo lwakho. Uhlala ulindele ukuba into ihambe gwenxa, ke xa isenzeka, kunzima ukungadubuli.
Ngenxa yokuba ungakhuselekanga kubudlelwane, nangona kunjalo, emva kokuba uphelelwe ngumsindo usenokuba nexhala lokuba ukudubuleka kwakho kuzokutshintsha indlela abaziva ngayo ngawe.
8. Ubuza imibuzo emininzi
Awuhlali wonwabile ukwamkela ingcaciso. Ubuza umbuzo emva kombuzo kwaye uhlalutye iimpendulo, uguqula amagama abo entlokweni yakho ukuzama ukufumana intsingiselo efihliweyo kubo.
9. Awuyonwabeli iSondo kangako
Ukuxhalaba kwakho malunga nolwalamano kwenza kube nzima kuwe ukuba uphumle ngokwenyani kwigumbi lokulala. Ukuba ungumfazi, unengxaki yokufumana ukoneliseka ngokwesondo rhoqo (ukuba kunjalo), kwaye ukuba uyindoda ungasokola ukwenza kwindawo yokuqala.
Isondo lakho lokuqhuba linokuncipha ngenxa yezi zinto ziphoxekileyo kwigumbi lokulala ukusondelelana nolwalamano lwakho usenokubandezeleka ngenxa yoko.
10. Uza Ngaphesheya Njengengqele
Ukuxhalaba ubudlelwane bakho kunokuthetha ukuba iqabane lakho licinga ukuba uyabanda, ume-up, okanye ukude. Uyazikhusela, kwaye ungathandi ukubonisa iintanda kwizixhobo zakho xa kunokwenzeka ukuba zingene, emva koko zikwenzakalise.
11. Okanye Unamathele kakhulu
Kwiphepha le-flip, ulwalamano lwakho noxinzelelo lunokuthetha ukuba uhamba ngenye indlela. Unokufuna rhoqo uthando lomzimba nolomlomo kunye nokuqinisekiswa ukuba basakuthanda, kwaye abakatshintshi ingqondo yabo okoko bagqibela ukuyithetha kwimizuzu emi-5 edlulileyo.
Ukoyisa ubudlelwane bakho bexhala
Unxunguphalo kubudlelwane yinto eyoyikisayo onokuyifumana. Kuthetha ukuba awukwazi ukonwabela umlingo wokuba sothandweni, ukhathazeke kakhulu ukuba iqabane lakho liya kwenza njalo kuwa kuyo .
Ngelishwa, onke amandla amabi owakhathazayo ngolwalamano lwakho inokuba sisizathu sokuba iqabane lakho liphele lifuna ukukuphelisa.
Ngethamsanqa, kuninzi onokukwenza ukuzola iingcinga zakho kwaye uqalise ukulungisa ingqondo yakho ukuze ukwazi ukonwaba kubudlelwane bakho kunokuhlala kwimeko yoxinzelelo rhoqo.
Nazi ezinye zeendlela ezilula zokukunceda woyise uxinzelelo kubudlelwane.
Funa uncedo kwiingcali.
Ukuthetha ngeengcinga zakho kunye neemvakalelo zakho kunceda abantu abaninzi ukuba bajongane nazo kwaye, kwimeko yakho, thomalaza isaqhwithi esihlasela ingqondo yakho.
Ungathetha neqabane lakho (njengoko siza kuxoxa kungekudala), kodwa mhlawumbi awuziva ukhululekile ngokwaneleyo ukuba okwangoku. Kunokuba lula kuwe ukuba uthethe nomntu ongakhethi cala kwaye oqeqeshwe ukunceda abantu abafana nawe kwimiceli mngeni yabo yobudlelwane.
Inketho elungileyo kwabaninzi njengesiqalo kukucetyiswa ngobuhlobo kwi-Intanethi. Xa unxibelelana nenye yeengcali zabo, uya kuba nendlebe enenkathalo elinde ukukumamela, kwaye bakuba bevile iinkxalabo zakho, baya kuba nakho ukunika isikhokelo esilungiselelwe ukukunceda ulawule elixhala kwaye ulinciphise lonto ayibuchaphazeli kakhulu ubomi bakho.
Ukuba ungathanda ukuphonononga olu khetho ngakumbi, ukuthetha nomntu ngoku.
1. Khumbula ukuba konke kuya kulunga.
Xa uphakathi kobudlelwane obuqhekeka, bunokuziva ngokulula njengokuphela kwehlabathi. Ngazo zonke iihormone ezijikelezayo, kunokuba nzima kakhulu ukugcina izinto ngendlela efanelekileyo kwaye zibone ukukhanya ekugqibeleni kwetonela.
Kulula njengokukhumbula ukuba, nokuba kwenzeka ntoni, konke kuya kulunga. Cinga emva. Mhlawumbi ukhe wafumana ukophuka kwentliziyo ngaphambili, kwaye wafika ngokulungileyo.
Ubulungile ngaphambi kokuba udibane neqabane lakho, kwaye, nangona kunokuba nzima, ubomi buya kuqhubeka emva kwabo ukuba izinto ziya kuhlala emazantsi.
Ubomi bakho abuyi kuphela xa ulwalamano lwakho lusenza, kwaye ukuba kubudlelwane ayisiyiyo yonke into kunye nokuphela kwayo yonke. Ubudlelwane bunokuba yinto entle, kodwa ayikaze ichaze wena.
Ukuba umntu akafuni ukuba nawe, akukho nto unokuyenza malunga naloo nto. Ufanele umntu oza kushukumisa izulu nomhlaba ukuba abenani.
Xa uvalo luqala ukunyuka, vele uzihlebele ukuba yonke into izakulunga. Ukuba uyithetha ngokwakho ngokwaneleyo, kungekudala okanye kamva uyakuqala ukuyikholelwa ngokwenyani.
Kancinci ukoyika ukuphela kobudlelwane, kokukhona uya kuba nakho ukuphumla kuwo kwaye wonwabe nje ngalo mzuzu.
2. Thetha neqabane lakho malunga nendlela oziva ngayo.
Ukunqongophala konxibelelwano okanye ukunganxibelelani gwenxa kuhlala kungunobangela woxinzelelo kubudlelwane, ke kungcono ukuba uthathele ingqalelo xa uthetha neqabane lakho.
Ukuba nenza izicwangciso zokubonana, yiba ngoyena mntu kufunwa iinkcukacha zekhonkrithi ezinje ukuba nini kwaye phi. Oku akuthethi ukuba uhlala usenza izigqibo (nangona uya kufuna ukwabelana ngoxanduva), kodwa oko kuthetha ukuba ngumququzeleli kubudlelwane bakho.
Unokuthi oku kuphela kukongezwa kokulawula kakhulu, kodwa akunjalo. Awuqhubi yonke into encinci ngokwakho, kodwa unika iingcinga zakho kwicala lokuhamba.
Ukuba ubudlelwane bakho busekiwe ngakumbi, kodwa uziva uxhalabile ngekamva labo, thetha neqabane lakho kwindawo yokunyaniseka nokuvuleleka.
Chaza indlela oziva ngayo kwaye ubaxelele ukuba ayingabo abayibangelayo, kodwa ngamava akho angaphambili. Zama ukunika imizekelo yeemeko ozifumanisa zinzima kwaye zinganakho njani ukuthomalalisa uloyiko lwakho.
Ukuba bazimisele malunga nolwalamano, baya kufuna ukwenza konke abanako ukukunika uxolo lwengqondo.
Ukuchaza iimvakalelo zakho kunokubanceda basabele ngovelwano ngakumbi xa ixhala lakho likwenza wenze into ebacaphukisayo. Bayazi ukuba awuthethi ukuba uthetha ntoni (okanye wenze) ngalo lonke ixesha kwaye banokukunceda woyise iimvakalelo zakho ngokungafaki mafutha emlilweni.
Kwaye isenzo sokuxelela iqabane lakho ngoxinzelelo lwakho kunokukwenza uzive ungcono kwangoko. Uya kuziva ngathi ubunzima bususwe emagxeni akho, kwaye ukuba bayaphendula ngokuqinisekileyo nangothando, uya kuziva uqinisekile ukuba abayi ndawo.
3. Khulisa inkululeko yakho.
Xa uthandana, ungaziva ngathi ungonwabile uhlala epokothweni yeqabane lakho ukuba unakho, kodwa ukuphulukana nobudlelwane bakho yindlela eqinisekileyo yomlilo yokuphakamisa amanqanaba akho oxinzelelo.
Ukuba uqala ukuzichaza kuphela malunga nolwalamano lwakho, ubeka uxinzelelo olukhulu kuyo ukuze uphumelele ekuhambeni kwexesha. Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, ubuya kuba ngubani ukuba ubuza hlukala ?
Qinisekisa ukuba wenza izinto ngokuzenzela wena kwaye ugcine ubomi ohlukile kwiqabane lakho. Sebenza ukugcina izinto ezikwenza ubonakale, kwaye mhlawumbi sisizathu sokuba iqabane lakho litsaleleke kuwe kwasekuqaleni.
Umlingane wakho ayinguye 'esinye isiqingatha,' kwaye abakugqibi. Sele uphelele kwaye ugqibelele njengokuba unjalo. Ukuba kubudlelwane kungummangaliso, kodwa akubalulekanga kulonwabo lwakho.
4. Qaphela ukuzinqanda ekuhlalutyeni yonke into abayenzayo.
Abantu benza amagqabaza okulahla. Abaliqwalaseli lonke igama abalithethayo, okanye bahlalutye iindlela apho wonke umyalezo obhaliweyo abawuthumelayo unokutolikwa ngengqondo yakho enexhala. Ke akufuneki uvumele izinto ezincinci zichaphazele imeko yengqondo yakho.
5. Khumbula ukuba ulawula ingqondo yakho ayikulawuli.
Awukho kwimfesane yengqondo yakho. Unamandla okuyilawula, ukuyilolonga, kunye nokuyiqeqesha. Nje ukuba uyiqonde loo nto, usenokuba namaxhala, kodwa uya kuba nakho ukuyiqonda kwaye uyiyeke idlule, kunokuba uyivumele ikudle kwaye ikhokele indlela oziphethe ngayo.
Ngaba awuqinisekanga ukuba ujongana njani noxinzelelo lwakho lobuhlobo?Ngelixa ungasebenza koku ngokwakho, kunokuba lula kwaye kube nokusebenza ngakumbi ukuba uthetha nengcali kwezonxibelelwano ezinokugcina kwindlela elungileyo njengoko ufunda ukulawula iingcinga neemvakalelo zakho.Ke kutheni ungaxoxi kwi-Intanethi kwenye yeengcali ezivela kwiQabane lobuhlobo ezinokukunceda ufumane izinto. Ngokulula.
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