Isidingo sokuchaneka ngumbono ongenampilo ngokungathandekiyo onokonakalisa ubomi bakho kunye nobungcali.
Isizathu esifutshane nesithandekayo sokuba kutheni kungekho mntu ufuna ukujongana nomntu osoloko ecinga ukuba ulungile.
Umntu ongenakho ukuthatha uxanduva ngeziphene zakhe kwaye abe nokungaphumeleli kwakhe ngumntu odala umsebenzi omninzi owongezelelekileyo kubantu ababangqongileyo.
Loo mntu uziva isidingo sokuhlala ulungile uya kuba nexesha elinzima lokuvuma ukuba bayingxaki, ukutyhalela uxanduva lwabo komnye umntu, apho ingeyiyo.
Phantse nayiphi na ingxaki inokulungiswa ukuba uzimisele kwaye uthembekile ngokwaneleyo ukwamkela indima yakho kuyo.
Ukuba umntu akakwazi ukuvuma ukuba uphosakele, kuya kwenza iingxaki zibe nzima kakhulu, kuba kuya kuthatha umsebenzi omninzi kakhulu ukulungisa imvelaphi yomcimbi.
Oko kuziphatha akunakuphelela kwizinto ezinkulu nazo.
Ngamaxesha athile, Abantu kunzima ukuba bavume ukuba babephosisile malunga nezinto ezincinci, njengempendulo yombuzo okanye ibango eliyimposiso abalenzileyo.
Kwaye kubi xa ingumhlobo okanye umntu omthandayo, kuba ungavutha ungene kwingxoxo engeyomfuneko engabalulekanga.
Oku kucenga umbuzo…
Kutheni le nto siziva sinesidingo sokuhlala silungile?
Isidingo sokuhlala silungile sinokugxilwa kwizinto ezimbalwa ezahlukeneyo.
Okokuqala, inkolelo eqhelekileyo kukuba sisigqubuthelo sokungazithembi- kwaye kuhlala kunjalo.
Umntu unenkxalabo yokuba abanye baya kubajonga njani ukuba bayaphazama okanye baziva ngathi abahlangani nazo naziphi na izinto ezilindelweyo kubo ukuba zilungile.
Olo hlobo lokungazithembi kuhlala kuyinto egxile emntwaneni njengomntwana ngenxa yeentshukumo zekhaya ezingasebenziyo okanye ezihlukumezayo.
Isidingo sokuba silungile inokuba yindlela yokuzikhusela eyamnceda loo mntu ukuba aphile nakweyiphi na into abanamava kuyo kwaye yayiyimfuneko kwelo xesha, kodwa kuyonakalisa kulo naluphi na uhlobo lobudlelwane obuphilileyo.
Okwesibini, uluntu lwangoku luthanda ukohlwaya abantu abangalunganga, kuba izinto ezininzi ziye zajika zaba yingxoxo engenantsingiselo yokuba 'ngubani olungileyo?'
Ipolitiki ngumzekelo ocacileyo. Abantu abakweli cala bahlala bekhala okanye bephikisana ngokuba ngubani olungileyo, bezama nje ukukhupha omnye komnye, kwaye bayala nokujonga izinto ezifanayo.
Ekugqibeleni, baphela bengena ndawo kuba ukuvuma ukuba bayaphosisa kuthetha ukuvuma umhlaba 'kutshaba.'
Okwesithathu, Ukuvuma ukuba akulunganga emsebenzini kunokuba neziphumo ezibi.
Abantu benza iimpazamo ngalo lonke ixesha, kodwa ukuba nezo mpazamo kwaye ukuvuma xa ungalunganga kunokumema abantu ukuba bazame ukukusebenzisa ngokuchasene nawe.
Mhlawumbi ngumphathi ongakunyamezeliyo nakuphi na ukusilela okanye ongakholelwa ukuba banokwenza nakuphi na okungalunganga.
Mhlawumbi ngumntu osebenza naye okhangela inyuselo okhuphisana nayo ngubani onokonwaba ngakumbi ukusebenzisa loo mpazamo ngokuchasene nawe.
Isidingo sokulunga sinokuba ngumkhwa ukuba uchitha iiyure ezingama-40 + ngeveki uqinisekisa ukuba uyazigquma ukuze ungabekwa tyala kwaye ugxothwe ngempazamo yomnye umntu kuba abafuni ukuvuma iimpazamo zethu.
Okwesine, Unabantu ababonisa ubukrelekrele bengqondo kwaye abanakukunceda kodwa babonise indlela ulwazi lwabo oluphezulu ngayo ngokukhomba xa abanye bengalunganga.
Basenokungafuneki ukuba babe “befanelekile” ngalo lonke ixesha ngaso nasiphi na isizathu esivakalayo kungesiso kuba kunjalo (ngokwenyani).
Abanalo ulwazi lwentlalo lokuqonda ukuba ukulungisa abantu kuyacaphukisa kakhulu kwaye kuhlala kungafuneki.
Kwaye, ekugqibeleni, Kukho icala lempilo yengqondo ye-equation.
Abantu abanemicimbi yezempilo yengqondo enje ngengxaki yokuxhalaba banokuziva isidingo sokuhlala befanelekile njengendlela yokugcina izinto ezingqondweni zabo nakubomi bucacile kwaye banokuxelwa kwangaphambili.
Ukuphazamiseka okubonakalayo kunye nokufika okungalindelekanga kunokucaphukisa kwaye kubangele ukungazinzi kwengqondo.
UChris benoit unobangela wokufa
Kunokuziva kungcono ukuba noxolo lwengqondo kunye nolonwabo kulomntu ukuba abambelele kuluvo lwabo malunga noko bacinga ukuba kulungile endaweni yokuzama ukuqonda enye indlela.
Ingxaki kukuba ayikhokeleli kuxolo lwengqondo kunye nolonwabo. Yibandage encinci enxebeni elinobuzaza elifuna ukuhoywa okusondeleyo.
Ngezi zinto engqondweni, masibuze…
Zeziphi iindlela endinokufuna ukuba zilunge zindilimaze?
Isidingo sokulunga sinokuba yingozi kubudlelwane babucala kunye nobungcali, kodwa njani?
Abantu abavakalelwa kukuba bahlala bechanekile bahlala bengaphulaphuli kakuhle.
Akukho mfuneko yokuba beve nantoni na malunga nokuthethwa ngomnye umntu ngalo mbandela kuba sele besazi ukuba yintoni impendulo - nokuba yintoni abayaziyo ukuba iyintoni.
Oko kuyingozi kuba kunokukuthintela ekuboneni nasekulungiseni iingxaki ezincinci ngaphambi kokuba zibe nkulu, kunye neengxaki ezinkulu ngaphambi kokuba zibe yintlekele.
Umntu othethayo uya kuhlala eziva ngathi akathembekanga okanye akahlonitshwa ngenxa yokuba ukungamanyelwa .
Oko kuphumela ngaphandle kubo akusazikhathazi ngokuthetha, kuba kutheni bezozikhathaza xa sele wenze isigqibo?
Ayisiyiyo kuphela ingxaki kwindawo yokusebenza, kodwa yindlela eqinisekileyo yokutshabalalisa ubudlelwane.
Unokuthanda (inqaku liyaqhubeka ngezantsi):
- Ungayiyeka Njani Inkani
- Iindlela ezili-9 zokuCima iZinto ezingathandekiyo Yazi-konke ebomini bakho
- Izithintelo ezi-8 kuNxibelelwano oluSebenzayo
- Iimpawu ze-9 zoBukrelekrele boLuntu oluPhezulu
Ngaba umntu ohlala ecinga ukuba ulungile angabona umfanekiso omkhulu?
Singangazi esingakwaziyo.
Ukukhula kunye nolwazi kuhlala kwenzeka ngaphandle kwemida yethu esele imiselwe.
Kutheni ungazihluphi ngokufuna ulwazi olutsha okanye olungcono ukuba sele ukholelwa ukuba uyazi into elungileyo?
Kutheni uzikhathaza ngokufunda nantoni na xa ucinga ukuba sele uyazi yonke into ekufuneka uyazi?
Yindlela emxinwa yokubona ubomi kunye nokuthintela ukukhula komntu.
Zonke ezo zinto ziluthuthu xa kuthelekiswa nezona ziphumo zibalulekileyo zibalulekileyo-imfuneko yokuba ulungile ikuhlutha ulonwabo.
Ngoba? Kuba umntu ekufuneka elungile akanako ukunyamezela xa omnye umntu ekho.
Banokuziva ngathi bahlala bekwisikhubekiso okanye bezikhusela kunye nawo wonke umntu ehlabathini onoluvo angavumelaniyo nalo.
Kwaye kweli xesha lenkcubeko yomsindo kwaye wonke umntu ecaphuka okanye ekhutyekiswa yiyo yonke into, kunzima kakhulu ukufumana ulonwabo noxolo lwengqondo xa uhlala untywiliselwe ngomsindo kwaye uzibandakanya kwingxabano.
Ngapha koko, akunakwenzeka ukuba wonwabe kwaye ube noxolo lwengqondo ukuba uhlala ubaphazamisa ngomsindo nengxabano.
Azingombuso ohambelanayo.
Kungenxa yoko le nto kubaluleke kakhulu ukukhetha amadabi kabani ngononophelo, ukulwa ungquzulwano olufanelekileyo, kwaye ufunde ukuvumela ezinye izinto zihambe.
Ihlabathi liyindawo enzima. Abantu banokungazi, banokuba zizidenge, okanye bafumane ulwazi olungelulo.
Banokumfanyekiswa ngumsindo wabo kwaye bangayiboni inyaniso.
Akukho nanye kuyo yonke into efanelekileyo, ngokwenene.
Ngokwenyani abantu batshintsha kuphela xa befuna kwaye ngekhe ube nakho ukweyisela umntu walonto ngokulwa nabo. Bahlala bemba nje kwiinkolelo zabo nzima.
Kodwa ukuba uyafuna ukutshintsha…
Ndiyiyeka njani imfuno yam ukuba ilunge ngalo lonke ixesha?
Ukuqonda ukuba unengxaki linyathelo lokuqala elikhulu lokoyisa. Kodwa yintoni enye ekufuneka uyenzile ukuze uyeke oku kuziphatha okungancediyo?
1. Qonda apho kuvela khona imfuneko yokuba ulunge.
Oko kunokuba yinto enzima ukuyichonga, ngakumbi ukuba awuhambisani nesiqu sakho.
Unokufumana ukuba awukwazi ukubona apho kuvela khona imfuno kuba ivela kwindawo embi.
Abantu abaye baphila kwiimeko ezibuhlungu okanye ezihlukumezayo banokuthi iinxalenye zememori yabo zicinezelwe.
Ukuba awukwazi ukuchonga apho kuvela khona imfuneko yokuba ulungile, kuya kuba kuhle ukuba uthethe nengcali yezempilo yengqondo eqinisekisiweyo malunga nengxaki nendlela yokuyilungisa.
2. Khetha ukuyeka ulawulo kwaye ulandele ukhokelo lomnye umntu ngenjongo.
Kwiinguqu zentlalo, abantu bahlala bewela okanye bazinyanzela kwiindima ezicingelwayo.
Umntu oqhele ukuzityhala ngaphambili kwiqela ukuze akhokele indlela kusenokufuneka enze ukhetho olusebenzayo lokubuyela umva kwaye avumele omnye umntu akhokele.
Iziphumo mhlawumbi azizukuvela ngendlela ocinga ngayo, kodwa uyakufumanisa ukuba abantu banokuba nakho ngokufanelekileyo ukuba banikwe inkululeko yokulandela indlela kunye neengcinga zabo.
Ungahlala unika iingcebiso malunga nendlela onokuqhubeka ngayo.
3. Zinyanzele ukuba uvume xa uphazamile.
Ukuvuma xa wenze into ephosakeleyo yenye yezona zinto zinzima, ezona zixabisekileyo onokuzenza.
Ngokwenza njalo, ubonisa ukuba uyayiqonda into yokuba uthathe isigqibo esingalunganga kwaye ufuna ukulungisa loo bhulorho nabanye abantu.
Isidingo sokulunga sibangela imiba kuba awungekhe ulunge. Unokuba nolwazi olubi okanye uphendule nje ngaphandle kwempembelelo.
Ukuthobeka yindlela eyomeleleyo yokoyisa ezo ntshukumisa kunye nokuzilawula kakuhle.
Cela umngeni kwimfuno yengqondo yakho ngokuqhubeka nokuphonononga izimvo zabanye abantu.
Buza abanye abantu ukuba kutheni bezikholelwa izinto ongavumelani nazo.
Ngokuzama ukujonga umhlaba ngamehlo abo, unokwandisa umbono wakho kwaye ufunde izinto ezintsha.
Mhlawumbi uya kufumanisa ukuba awulunganga ngokupheleleyo emva kwayo yonke loo nto!
Okona kuncinci, ubuncinci uza kufumana amava ngakumbi ngeendlela ezahlukeneyo ezibanzi.
5.Vavanya izakhono zakho zentlalo ukuze ubone ukuba kungafuneka basebenze na.
Ubukrelekrele bomntu bunokuphazamisa ukuqonda kwabo kwezentlalo, ngakumbi ukuba banemicimbi yezempilo yengqondo echaphazela intlalontle.
Izakhono zentlalo zizinto ezinokufundwa kunye nokuhonjiswa ngokufunda incwadi kunye nokuziqhelanisa.
Isidingo sokulunga ngalo lonke ixesha sinokonakalisa ubudlelwane bakho nabanye abantu, njengokuhlazisa iqabane ngokuxoxa ngento engenamsebenzi kungekho mntu uyikhathaleleyo.
Ukwazisa ngokwasentlalweni kukwazi ukubona xa kufanelekile ukuphikisana kwaye xa kufanelekile ukuba ulume ulwimi lwakho.
6. Kwaye okona kubalulekileyo - qhubeka uzama!
Ukulungisa olu hlobo lokucinga ayisiyiyo enye kwaye yenziwe imeko.
Yingxaki eya kufuna umzamo ongaguquguqukiyo, ophindaphindiweyo kwithuba elithile ukulungisa.
Isenokufuna uncedo lwengcali yezempilo yengqondo ukuba uziva ngathi kunzima ukuhlala kwikhondo okanye ufuna uncedo olugxile ngakumbi.
