Ngaba uqaphele ukuba iqabane lakho belikhe lahamba nawe mva nje, mhlawumbi lithetha izinto ezinoburharha kwaye likhupha ngaphezulu kwesiqhelo?
Okanye mhlawumbi uye walala ubusuku obutshanje kwaye wacinga ngazo zonke izinto ozithethileyo, kwaye waqonda ukuba ezimbalwa kubo bawele umgca.
ukuthemba njani amadoda emva kokuba enzakele
Kuqhelekile ukucaphukisana (nokuba ngabom) kubudlelwane, kodwa ngokulula kungahamba kakhulu kwaye kube ngumcimbi.
Ukuba ucinga ukuba amagama abuhlungu aya esiba yingxaki kubudlelwane bakho, kuya kufuneka ujongane nomcimbi kwaye ufumane indlela yokuwuthintela ukuba ungabi mbi.
Ngethamsanqa, sifumene iingcebiso ezintle onokuzilandela ukuqinisekisa ukuba ubuyela kwindawo elungileyo neqabane lakho, nokuba ngowuphi na ophosayo amagama anentsingiselo macala onke.
Wazi njani ukuba kukho ingxaki?
Usenokucinga ukuba 'Ndazi njani ukuba imbi ngokwenene, okanye ayiqhelekanga?'
Ewe, uninzi lwethu luye lwafumana amanye amagama amabi ephoswa kubudlelwane bethu, ke kunokuba nzima ukwazi ukuba into ihambe kakhulu kwaye ingoyena mcimbi.
Ngelixa kungekho mfuneko yoku, okanye amaxesha aliqela iyenzeka ngaphambi kokuba ibe yinto embi, kukho imiqondiso onokuyijonga- Enye yazo kukuba waziva unesidingo sokukhangela eli nqaku!
Ngaba ingathi yinto eqhelekileyo ngokuchasene neemeko ezithile? Oko kunokuthetha ukuba uthetha izinto ezimbi kwiqabane lakho ngenxa yokuba uqhele ukuzithetha, hayi kuba kukho into eyenzekileyo.
Ngaba kuchaphazela kakubi ukuzithemba komntu? Ngaba uziva ungalunganga malunga nawe okanye uxabiseke xa iqabane lakho likubiza ngamagama?
Ngaba ungaziva ukhululekile ngale ndlela yokuziphatha ukuba iqabane lomhlobo wakho belisenza kubo? Ukuba ungayifaka iflegi njengomcimbi kubudlelwane bomnye umntu, kuya kufuneka uphawule njengelinye kubudlelwane bakho.
Kutheni iqabane lam lindingxolisa?
Ngelixa kungekho sizathu sokuziphatha gwenxa, kunokunceda ekufumaneni ukuba isukaphi.
Le inokuba yinto onokuthi uxoxe ngayo kamva emgceni, kodwa okwangoku, makhe sijonge ezinye zezizathu zolu hlobo lokuziphatha:
Umsindo
Iqabane lakho linokuba nomsindo ngokwenene, kodwa hayi nawe.
Xa sinomsindo kwaye sizama ukukuqulatha, ihlala ibhabhu ngaphantsi komphezulu kwaye into encinci inokusibamba ngaphaya komphetho kwaye ibangele ukuba loo mvakalelo ikhululeke.
Ukuba iqabane lakho linemicimbi ethile yomsindo, okanye umsebenzi oxinzelelekileyo, kusenokwenzeka ukuba bebebhodlela ingqumbo yabo imini yonke emsebenzini kwaye ekugqibeleni bayothuka xa befika ekhaya kuba abasenayo 'imfuneko' yokuyibamba kunye ukuze babe ziingcali izizathu.
Ukukhathazeka
Ukuba iqabane lakho lihlala likhwaza kunokuba likhwaze, banokuziva bekhathazekile kwaye becaphukile.
Kuyafana ngasentla, ezi mvakalelo zinokuhlala ngaphantsi komphezulu kwaye ziphuphume. Ungaqaphela ukuba bayapheka cwaka okanye babonakala benomsindo ngawe ngaphambi kokuba bathethe kwaye bathethe izinto ezimbi.
Ukuzijongela phantsi
Abo kuthi banamazinga okuzithemba aphantsi ngamanye amaxesha banokuzama ukubeka abanye phantsi ukuze bazive bhetele ngathi.
Mhlawumbi iqabane lakho linomona ngempumelelo yakho, okanye linqwenela ukuba babe nokuzithemba njengawe kwezinye izinto, ke bazama ukukuhlisa ngokuthetha izinto ezibuhlungu.
Imiba engasonjululwanga
Unokuziva ngathi iqabane lakho linomsindo, kodwa kunokubakho okungaphezulu koko.
Ukuba zihlala zibangelwa yinto enye, kukho into abangayithethiyo.
Mhlawumbi bayakuqubula ngalo lonke ixesha uthetha ngento okanye usenza into ethile, kodwa abakhange bavakalise ukuba kutheni le nto ibabangela. Siza kuya kule kamva.
Ndingabagqitha njani kwizinto ezimbi abazithethayo kum?
Ezinye izinto akufuneki uzame ukudlula kuzo - ukuba la magama abuhlungu aya kuba ngumbandela onyanisekileyo, onzulu, unokufuna uncedo. Siza kungena kule ngcaciso ingezantsi!
Ukuba ucinga ukuba ezi zimvo zibi azenzelwanga ngabom okanye zexesha elifutshane ngokuchasene nokoyikisa wena, zikho iindlela zokudlula kuzo.
Khumbula ukuba mhlawumbi azithethi ngokwenyani oko zikuthethayo. Xa sinomsindo okanye sicaphukile, sihlala sikhwaza sizame ukukhathaza omnye umntu ngenxa yendlela esivakalelwa ngayo.
Ngaba ukhe wambiza umhlobo nge-b * tch, nokuba ayinguye, ukukhathaza iimvakalelo zabo kuba bekwenzakalisile eyakho? Akulunganga ukuvuma ukwenza, kodwa sonke sinomlo oqhubeka usanda!
Yigcine engqondweni le nto xa iqabane lakho likujongisa kuwe kwaye lithetha izinto ezibuhlungu. Akunakulindeleka ukuba bakholelwe le nto bayithethayo-kungenjalo ngekhe babe nawe.
Endaweni yoko, bazama nje ukonakalisa iimvakalelo zakho nangayiphi na indlela. Ukuqola? Akunakulinganiswa? Ewe.
Kubalulekile ukuba uqaphele ukuba iqabane lakho elifuna ukukhathaza iimvakalelo zakho, ngokungaguquguqukiyo, alilunganga. Ukuba uziva ngathi ngabom bakwenza uzive ungalunganga, ngaphezulu kwexesha elininzi, unokuba kubudlelwane obuhlukumezayo kwaye kufuneka ufune uncedo lwangaphandle.
Ndingabanqanda njani ekubeni bangalunganga kum?
Njengoko besesitshilo apha ngasentla, zininzi izizathu ezibangela ukuba iqabane lakho lithethe izinto ezibuhlungu kuwe. Ukuze uhambise phambili lo mbandela, unobangela osisiseko kufuneka kujongwane nawo.
Ewe unokusebenza ekubeni ungakhathazeki kakhulu ngamanye amagqabantshintshi abo baphosileyo, kodwa kuya kufuneka bathathe uxanduva ukuba izinto ziya kutshintsha ngenene.
Akukho nto ihlala iyimpazamo yakho, kwaye akufuneki uthathe uxinzelelo lwabo ngalo lonke ixesha kuvela umcimbi onje.
Nxibelelana nabo ngokunyanisekileyo - baxelele ukuba amazwi abo ayakukhathaza. Akufanele uyenze le nto xa isenzeka, njengoko uxinzelelo luza kuba phezulu kwaye akunakulindeleka ukuba ufumane impendulo oyifunayo. Endaweni yoko, lindani ixesha elizolileyo xa ninobabini niyichaze.
Sukukrokra kwaye uqale ukucaphula iikowuti ngqo kwiintsuku ezithile, kodwa jonga indlela abavakalelwa ngayo:
“Nindibize ngamagama amabi ngethuba sisilwa ngenye imini, kwaye bendifuna nje ukujonga ukuba yonke into ilungile na phakathi kwethu.”
“Ndikhathazekile kwangethuba ngenxa yezinto ozithethileyo - ingaba yonke into ilungile?”
'Ndiqaphele ukuba ukhathazekile kutshanje, ngaba ufuna ukuthetha ngayo nantoni na?'
Ezi ntlobo ze-intros zigcina izinto zizolile kwaye zikhuthaze incoko evulekileyo phakathi kwenu nobabini.
Basenokungayiqondi into yokuba bebekade besenza loo nto, ukuze bazive bekhubekekile kwaye babe ne-cagey -ngapha koko, akukho mntu uthanda ukubizelwa isimilo esibi!
Ukuba oku kuyenzeka, thatha inyathelo ubuye umva kwaye uthi ungaphinda uthethe ngesihloko ngexesha elingcono, ufuna nje ukungena nabo.
shawn michaels umculo omnandi wesilevu
The more you vocalize a) iimvakalelo zakho kunye b) inkxalabo yakho kunye nenkxaso kubo, kokukhona kunokwenzeka ukuba bayithathele ingqalelo into oyithethayo kwaye baqale ukuyitshintsha.
Qaphela iimeko-ukuba baphulukene nomsebenzi, okanye bajongene nemicimbi yosapho, kusenokwenzeka ukuba le ndlela yokuziphatha izakuba yeyokwexeshana. Oko akuyenzi ibe yinto evakalayo, kodwa oko kuthetha ukuba kuya kufuneka uzame ukungayithathi entliziyweni ulinde ukuba iqhushumbe.
Ewe kunjalo, akho amaxesha apho ungasenakuthatha ixesha elide. Ukuba lo iba ngumcimbi onobuzaza ochaphazela indlela oziva ukhuseleke ngayo, okanye impilo-ntle yakho kunye nokuphila kakuhle, kuya kufuneka uthethe nomntu omthandayo omthembayo okanye ufikelele kwiingcali ezinokukucebisa ngcono ukuba wenzeni.
Khumbula ukuba ukhuseleko lwakho luhlala luza kuqala, kwaye ulungile kumalungelo akho okuhamba ulwalamano olubeka naliphi na ilungu lengqondo okanye lomzimba wakho emngciphekweni.
Ndingayeka njani ukuthetha izinto ezibuhlungu kwiqabane lam?
Ukuba uqaphele ukuba uliqabane elithetha izinto ezibuhlungu, kufuneka ujonge ukuba kutheni kunjalo.
Kwaye ungene nzulu kunokuba 'bandicaphukisile' okanye 'bendinosuku olubi emsebenzini.'
Sonke sinamava eemvakalelo, kodwa abanye bethu banokuzilawula ngcono kwaye baneempendulo ezifanelekileyo kubo. Luxanduva lwakho ukumodareyitha isimilo sakho.
xa umntu etsala ithatha ixesha elingakanani
Ukuba iqabane lakho lizise le nto kuwe, kuya kufuneka uxolise kubo kwaye uvume ukuba lo ngumba. Ngokuqinisekileyo, sonke siyaqhekeza kwaye sithethe izinto ezimbi ngamanye amaxesha, kodwa ukuba ifanele iqabane lakho ukuba lisondele malunga nalo, kufuneka ukuba libi kakhulu.
Khumbula ukuba abakutyholi kuba bekucaphukela, okanye kuba befuna ukwahlukana nawe-bafuna ukuba usebenzele kule ndlela yokuziphatha ukuze ubudlelwane bonwabe kwaye busempilweni, kuba bayakuthanda kwaye bafuna ukuba nawe.
Ukuza kulo mbono kuya kukunceda ukuba usebenze ngakumbi xa kuziwa ekwenzeni utshintsho. Kufuneka ufumane iindlela zokuxhasa iqabane lakho ekuxhaseni.
Cinga ngendlela ekumele ukuba liyenza ngayo iqabane lakho ukuba lizive, kwaye ulisebenzise njengemodareyitha yakho. Ukuxolisa kulungile, kodwa ayithethi nto ukuba uqhubeka usenza into enye kwakhona.
Kuya kufuneka ubonise ukuba uzibophelele ekwenzeni iqabane lakho liziva lithandwa, lixabisekile, kwaye likhuselekile, ngokumilisela utshintsho lwexesha elide olubeka phambili ubudlelwane.
Kutheni ndithetha izinto ezimbi kwisithandwa sam?
Jonga ukuba kutheni isenzeka.
Mhlawumbi unemicimbi ethile yokulawula umsindo onokuthi ufumane uncedo kuyo.
Mhlawumbi kukho enye into eyenzekayo ebangela ezi mvakalelo- unganyaniseka kwiqabane lakho malunga nento ebangela ukuba uqhume?
Ngaba uyabacaphukisa ngokudlala ngothando nomntu othile kwiinyanga ezidlulileyo, kwaye ubabohlwaya endaweni yokujongana nomcimbi kwaye unxibelelane nabo?
Ngaba unomsindo kumphathi wakho kwaye, endaweni yokuba ubaxelele, uyikhupha kwindawo ethile 'ekhuselekileyo,' apho ungazukugxothwa ngenxa yokukhwaza?
Usenokuba uqikelela iimvakalelo zakho malunga nezinye izinto ebomini bakho kwiqabane lakho, njengoko kuchaziwe apha ngasentla, okanye kungenxa yokuzithemba okuphantsi. Ukuba uziva unenzondo malunga nelifa lakho ebomini, okanye awuziva uzithembile, kunokwenzeka ukuba uzame ukubathoba abanye - nkqu nabo ubathandayo.
Unokuba uthetha izinto ezibuhlungu kwiqabane lakho kuba kukho into malunga nolwalamano engalunganga ncam.
Endaweni yokuba ubaphathe kakubi kwaye ubashiye ukuze babone ukuba yintoni engalunganga phakathi kwakho, yiba ngumntu omkhulu kwaye unxibelelane.
Nokuba leliphi icala lamagama abuhlungu okulo, kukho amanyathelo onokuwathatha ukuphucula ubudlelwane bakho. Khumbula ukuba kufuneka ube yinto ephambili kuwe, nokuba oko kuthetha ukuhamba xa kuninzi kakhulu.
Ngaba awuqinisekanga ukuba wenzeni malunga nezinto ezenzakalisayo wena okanye iqabane lakho (okanye zombini)? Thetha kwi-Intanethi kwingcali yobudlelwane kwi-Relationship Hero enokukunceda ufumane izinto. Ngokulula.
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