Inye kuphela Inkqubo yokubuyisa gadalala uyakuze ufune.
Cofa apha ukuze ufunde ngakumbi.
Ukuba ukwinkqubo yokuchacha kwi-narcissistic gadalala, nokuba uvela kwiqabane okanye kumzali, usenokuba uziva ubuthathaka kakhulu ngoku.
Oku kunokwenzeka kuba ukujongana narcissist kunokutya kuyo yonke into ekwenze wanguye. Okanye babenjalo, kuxhomekeke ekubeni uxhatshazo olo luqhubeke ixesha elingakanani.
Iingcebiso ezilandelayo zenziwa ngokucinga ukuba sele umnqumle umxhaphazi we-narcissistic ebomini bakho.
Ukuba awukasindi, licebo elihle ukufunda inqaku lethu ku njani ukushiya ubudlelwane obunetyhefu . Kungale ndlela kuphela apho uya kuthi ukwazi ukuthatha amanyathelo afanelekileyo okufumana kwakhona ekuphatheni gadalala oxhatshazwe kuko.
1. Zijikele Kwinto Oyithandayo
AmaNarcissist ayazixakekisa kangangokuba enza ukuba imihlaba yawo ijikeleze kwiziqu zawo.
Ukuba i-narc ebomini bakho ikwenza ube neentloni ngenxa yomdla wakho okanye izinto ozithandayo, okanye ngokungathandabuzekiyo ukuthintele ekuthatheni inxaxheba kuzo, kungenzeka ukuba uyayivala loo nxalenye yakho ukunqanda ungquzulwano, ukuthotywa okanye ukohlwaywa ngabo.
Enye yeendlela ezilungileyo zokuphilisa kobu bundlobongela kukuntywilisela kwezona zinto zikugcinileyo ukuba uzenze.
Ngaba uyakuthanda ukubhaka, kodwa umntu wakho wakudala wayeqhele ukubamba ukutya ukutya kunye nokukuhlazisa? Tyala imali kwizixhobo ezitsha zokubhaka, kwaye wenze iindawo ezintle zokuzonwabisa.
Kuthekani ngokuzonwabisa? Ngaba bahlekise ngawe 'uncool' ngezinto zobugcisa othanda ukuzenza? Ewe, bemkile ngoku: khetha abo baphinde babuye ngomdla opheleleyo.
Olu hlobo lokuzintywilisela lunokuphilisa kakhulu. Ayenzi nje kuphela thatha ingqondo / ingqondo yakho kude nomonakalo owenziwe nguloo mntu , kodwa uya kugcwele amandla owonwabileyo ekuthululeni ingqalelo yakho kwinto entle.
AmaNarcissist alunge kakhulu ngokuhlutha ubuni bendalo babantu kubo, abasebenzise ngobuqhetseba, kwaye abenze balibale ukuba bangobani kanye kanye.
Lixesha lokuba ubuye umva kwaye uzibhiyozele.
2. Mka Kubo
Hlala kude nalowo owonileyo, kwaye ungazivumeli ukuba utsalwe kulo naluphi na uhlobo lonxibelelwano okanye umdlalo nabo.
Unokulingwa ukuba ube nemfesane kwaye uxolele kubo, kodwa ungakwenza oko ngaphakathi, ngaphandle kokuzibandakanya.
Ngenye indlela, nje ukuba uqale uzive unamandla kwaye uzithembile, ungaziva ulingeka ukuba ujongane narcissist malunga nendlela abakuphathe kakubi ngayo.
Sukuya kubavumela ukuba babhuqe oononkala kumanxeba aphola kakuhle.
Nokuba ungathini okanye wenze ntoni, baya kuyenza soze qonda indlela ezikuchaphazele ngayo izenzo zabo. Oku akubangelwa kukuba abakhathaleli: ngokwenene ayinakukwazi yokuqonda oko.
Ukuba uzama ukufuna ukuqinisekiswa okanye ukubuyiswa, uya kuphela ukwenzakala. Baya kuthoba kwaye kukukhanyisele kwakhona, tsalela umnxeba kwabo iinkawu eziphaphazelayo njengogcino, kwaye wenze ubomi bakho bube sisihogo esiphilayo. Kwakhona.
Awusoze ufumane impendulo oyifunayo kubo, kwaye abayi kuze bavume nakuphi na ukungalunganga. Qhubeka ungabahoyi, kwaye ujonge ekuphiliseni kwakho.
Ubanikile ngokwaneleyo ukukhanya kwakho.
3. Wamkele iipropati zokuphilisa zesandi
Ngaba ungumntu othulwe kukuthula? Okanye ukhetha ukuba umculo udlale ngasemva? Nokuba yeyiphi oyithandayo, yenze loo nto ibe yinxalenye yemihla ngemihla.
Olunye ukhetho olukhulu lokujonga ukujonga kukuthomalalisa, ukucamngca okukhokelwayo. Zininzi kwezi ezikhoyo ngoku, zibaliswa ngamazwi ahlukeneyo. Uqinisekile ukuba uza kufumana ezimbalwa ezinceda ukunciphisa uxhalaba, gxila kumzuzu wangoku, kwaye zikuncede uzive womelele kwaye ukhuselekile.
Kutheni le nto olu hlobo lokugxila kuphononongo lubaluleke kangaka? I-narcissist ebomini bakho yathetha izinto ezininzi ezoyikisayo kuwe kangangokuba ubuqhele ukuva ukungakhathali kwaye ayikho enye into.
Amagama athethiweyo kuthi athambile ezingqondweni zethu ngokungapheliyo, kodwa sinokwenza indima yethu ukubabuyisela endaweni elungileyo.
Xa uziva uzikhathaza ngezinto ebezithethwe ngumxhaphazi wakho, thobela izandi ezimnandi endaweni yoko.
4. Cela Abantu Obathandayo Bakuphakamise Bancome
Ngaphandle kokuba i-narc obaleke kuyo ikude nentsapho yakho kunye nenethiwekhi yoluntu, amathuba okuba ube nabahlobo abakhulu ebomini bakho.
Kwiminyaka eyadlulayo, xa bendijongene nesiphumo sobudlelwane obuhlukumezayo, umhlobo wam osele ekhulile wandicebisa into.
Ucebise ukuba ndiqale uxwebhu lweLizwi okanye iphephancwadi elibhalwe ngesandla apho ndibhala khona zonke izinto ezintle ezithethwe ngabantu ngam. Ngale ndlela, nanini na ndiziva ndilusizi okanye ndingaxabisekanga, ndandinokubuyela kula manqaku kwaye ndikhumbule izinto ezakhayo kwilizwi labanye abantu.
AmaNarcissist enza inqaku lokusika abanye ukuze kube lula ukuwasebenzisa. Oku kunokuba yinto eyoyikisayo ngokuzithemba kwabo, kwaye olo hlobo lomonakalo lungathatha iminyaka ukwakhiwa kwakhona.
Musa ukoyika okanye ube neentloni ukucela uncedo ekuphiliseni oku. Xa unika abantu ithuba lokuba boyike, baya kuhlala bekumangalisile.
Yazisa isangqa sakho ekuhlaleni ukuba yintoni ojongane nayo, kwaye ungathanda uncedo lwabo. Buza ukuba bakuxelele into abayithandayo kunye / okanye abayixabisayo ngawe, kwaye ugcine izicwili zilungele.
Ngaphambi kokuba uyazi, uya kugalelwa ngamanzi anothando, axhasayo oko kunokukunceda wakhe ukuzithemba kwakho kunye nokuzithanda ngokwakho.
Nangaliphi na ixesha uqala ukuva ubugebenga be-narc ngasemva kwekhakhayi lakho, vula loo jenali okanye uxwebhu kwaye ujonge kuyo. Ukubona onke loo magama anobubele kuya kukunceda ukuba ubuphephe bonke ububi obenziwe kuwe.
5. Phumla ngokufanelekileyo
Ukujongana ne-narcissist kuyadinisa, kwaye unokuba nentsilelo enkulu xa kuziwa kwindawo efanelekileyo, yokuvuselela ukuphumla. Kuxhomekeke ekubeni usebenze ixesha elingakanani kunye nolo xhatshazo, usenokuba ulwa nokudinwa kwe-adrenal ngokunjalo.
Musa ukuzibetha ngenxa yokuziva ngathi awunamandla ngokwaneleyo okucoca, okanye ukunxulumana nabanye, njl. Vumela indawo kunye nexesha elifunekayo lokuphilisa kuko konke okhe wadlula kuko.
Yenza igumbi lakho lokulala okanye indawo yokulala yamkelwe kwaye ithobe kangangoko.
Thatha ikhefu xa ufuna, kwaye uzame ubuchule obufana neyoga yangokuhlwa yangokuhlwa, okanye iibhafu ezinde zokukunceda uphumle.
Ukuba unengxaki yokuphumla kunye nokulala, okanye ufumanisa ukuba uxinzelelo kunye nokuzithemba kukugcina ebusuku, thetha nomboneleli wakho wezempilo. Banokukunceda ngezincedisi ezinokukunceda uphumle ngokufanelekileyo.
Kulungile ngokupheleleyo ukuba ufuna ukulala iiyure ezili-10 ngobusuku ngoku, kunye nokulala emva kwemini. Ukhe wadlula kwisihogo esinye sobunzima: zinike indawo kunye nexesha elifunekayo lokuphilisa kuyo.
6. Phinda ufumane amandla akho
Kuba i-narcissists yenza konke okusemandleni abo ukungabinamandla, ukuthoba isidima, kunye nokulawula iithagethi zabo, unokuziva ngathi uzobe equleni elingenanto ngelixa uchacha ekuphathweni gadalala.
Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, bayagalela kakhulu Umzamo wokwenza abanye bazive bengaxabisekanga kwaye bengenamandla.
Ukuba ukufumanisa kunzima ukuqonda ukuba ungayigcwalisa njani loo nto, bamba iphephancwadi lakho, wenze ikomityi yeti, kwaye ubhale phantsi abantu kunye neemeko ozithandayo, kwaye uziqwalasele zinamandla.
Ukhe wazindwendwela iindawo ezinamandla kunye namandla?
Ngoobani abanye beemodeli zakho ezinamandla, ezinamandla? Yintoni abaye bayoyisa? Yintoni oyithandayo nexabisekileyo ngayo?
Abantu banokuphinda bafumane amandla abo ngeendlela ezininzi ezahlukeneyo. Rhoqo, Ukufumana kwakhona la mandla kubandakanya ingqondo / umzimba / amava omoya apheleleyo , Njengokuba womelele kuzo zontathu ezo zinto kudala ukuvisisana okumangalisayo namandla kwisiqu sakho.
Akukho ncwadana enye 'yokwenza njani' kule nto, njengoko wonke umntu ehlukile. Into umntu anokuyifumana inomdla kwaye inika amandla inokungathandeki komnye, kwaye ngokuchaseneyo.
Yenza uphando, kwaye uzame iindlela ezahlukeneyo, izifundo, iirejimeni, kunye neziqhelo de ufumane into ekonwabisa.
Kumntu omnye, oko kunokubandakanya ukubaleka kwemihla ngemihla, ukubhalwa kweencwadi ezishicilelweyo rhoqo, kunye nokuzimasa iveki nganye kwindlu yonqulo.
Inkqubo yokuzixhobisa yomnye umntu inokubandakanya ukuphakanyiswa kwamandla, ukuntywiliselwa kulwimi olutsha, kunye nobugqwirha / ukupela.
Nantoni na oyikhethayo ilungile kwaye iyasebenza: okubalulekileyo kukuba kukwenza uzive womelele kwaye unamandla kwakhona.
7. Ziphathe ngokwakho
Nje ukuba okokuqala thanda ibhombu iphelile, amathuba okuba i-narc kuye kwafuneka ujongane nayo uchithe ixesha elininzi uyokuthuka kwaye ukuxhaphaza kunokwenza nantoni na entle kuwe.
Ngapha koko, kunokwenzeka ukuba bathathe uyolo olugwenxa ngokwenza kunye nokuthenga izinto ezintle ngokwabo kwaye bakugcobe ebusweni bakho.
Unokuba ugoba ngasemva ubenzela izinto ezinkulu, okanye ubothuse ngezipho ezincinci ukuzama ukugcina bonwabile. Kuxhomekeka kwiimeko zakho, usenokude unxibe ngokwakho umgqakhwe ubaxhasa ngokwezimali nangokucoca emva kwabo.
Ewe, uqikelele ntoni? Ngoku ungathatha lonke ixesha, amandla, kunye nokhathalelo obukade uligalela kwizinto zabo ezimnyama ezanyayo kwaye uzityale ngokwakho.
Ngenxa yokuba ufanele.
Ukunyanga ngokwakho akuthethi ukuba uza kuhamba rhoqo kwindawo yokuthenga rhoqo, ngaphandle kokuba unayo indlela yokwenza njalo, kwaye olo hlobo lwento luyonwabisa ngokwenene.
Kufana kakhulu… nokuqinisekisa ukuba uzenzela izinto ezincinci ezikwenza uncume, kwaye zikwenze uzive uxabisekile.
Ngaba uyazithanda iintyatyambo? Musa ukulinda omnye umntu ukuba akufunele: thatha isipha ngexesha elizayo xa uphumile, kwaye uwagcine kwivasi kwindawo yakho yokulala ebusuku.
Ngaba uthwele uxinzelelo oluninzi emagxeni akho? Bhukisha uthambise ngokwakho kwaye usebenze loo maqhina.
Ukuzikhathalela kubaluleke kakhulu, kwaye kuhlala kubekwa njengeyona nto iphambili xa ujongene narcissist. Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, yonke into ijikeleze kubo, kwaye ngaphandle kokuba ulungiselela iimfuno zabo kunye neemfuno zabo, abacingi nokucinga ngawe.
Beka wena kunye neemfuno zakho njengeyona nto iphambili ngoku.
8. Zixolele
Kunzima kakhulu ukujonga emva kubudlelwane kunye ne-narcissist kwaye ungazibethi ngokwakho.
Ndikhe ndalapho, kwaye bendisoyika kakhulu ixesha elide lokuba ndinyamezele isimilo setyhefu okoko ndenzayo.
Xa sikwinkqubo yokuchola iziqwenga zethu emva kokuba i-narc isiphazamisile, kulula kakhulu ukuwela ekuthetheni gwenxa, nokuzithetha gwenxa. Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, yile nto sasiqhele ukuyiva kubo, kwaye ngaphandle kokuhlaselwa rhoqo lilizwi labo, kuhlala kukho isithuba esisigcwalisayo phantse ngethuku.
Oku kuyandiswa yimvakalelo yeentloni, kunye nemibuzo emininzi malunga nokuziphatha kwethu.
Kutheni ndingakhange ndivume imiqondiso elumkisayo xa ndiqala ukuyibona?
Yintoni endinqandayo ukuba ndihambe okokuqala xa bethuka?
Ndibavumele njani ukuba bandiphathe kakubi?
Kutheni le nto ndigalele amandla amaninzi, umonde, kunye nemfesane kumntu ongazange abuyise nto?
Kwenzeka njani ukuba ndibe sisidenge kangaka?
Nceda uzame ukuba nobubele kwaye uxolele kuwe. Wena, njengomphefumlo onobubele, onothando, kwaye ngokunokwenzeka, wazama ukunceda (nothando) umntu ongakwaziyo ukuthanda umntu ngaphandle kwakhe.
Awuzange ube buthathaka okanye ungathandeki. Kukonke.
AbakwaNarcissist bachitha amashumi eminyaka begqibezela ubugcisa bokukhohlisa abanye abantu ukuba basebenze ukuthanda kwabo kunye neemfuno zabo. Baziinkosi zokukhanyisa ngegesi kwaye ukumngcungcuthekisa ngokweemvakalelo , kwaye uneendlela ezimangalisayo zokuhamba nezinto ezoyikisayo, ngelixa usola abanye abantu ngazo.
Aba bantu bakholisa ukuba namathambo amaninzi kumagunjana abo, akukho ndawo yeNarnia. Banemithunzi emininzi kangangokuba bafuna ukujongwa rhoqo kunye nomdlalo weqonga ukubaphazamisa kubuvuvu babo. Kananjalo, baveza ukungakhathali kwabo kwabanye ukuze kungafuneki bajonge, okanye bavume, isimilo sabo esibi.
Nokuba benze njalo, ngekhe bavume.
Unothando, unenkathalo, kwaye unemfesane kwabanye - zama ukuguqula ezinye zazo ngaphakathi kwaye ube nobubele kuwe.
Uthintelo, ukuba kunokwenzeka
Ukuba akukho nanye kwezi zingasentla zisebenza kuwe kuba nangoku kubudlelwane obuhlukumezayo kunye narcissist, ke unethuba lokuyiphelisa ngaphambi kokuba ikwenzakalise kwakhona.
Uthintelo lusebenza ngakumbi kunalo naluphi na unyango, kwaye ukumisa imeko phambi kokuba ityhefu ibe nethuba lokungena nzulu ngakumbi kuwe kubalulekile.
Ukuba ubambekile kuloo meko kwaye ngokoqobo ngekhe ushiye, jonga ngaphakathi indlela 'yegrey rock' .
Le yindlela yokujongana nokuphathwa gadalala: ukuba kunyanzelekile ukuba unxibelelane nabo, uya kufunda ukubonisa mpendulo kwaphela, nokuba benza ntoni.
Kuyadinisa ngokupheleleyo, kodwa kuyabathintela ekufumaneni naluphi na ulwaneliseko kwinkohlakalo kuwe. Cinga ngako njengokucima amanzi okanye ubonelelo lokutya: abanako ukondla amandla akho ukuba awubavumeli nakuphi na ukufikelela kuwo.
Baza kuzama ukukuchasa okanye bakwenzakalise, kwaye kuya kufuneka uhambe uyokhala kwaye ukhalele kwiipilo xa bengekho, kodwa kunokunceda.
ukufumana ubudlelwane kwakhona kumkhondo
Ndiyathemba ukuba uya kuba nakho ukuzikhupha kuloo meko ngokukhawuleza, ukuze uqale inkqubo yokuphilisa kwaye uphilele ubomi bakho.
Khumbula ukuba ukuchacha ekuphathweni gadalala akuyona inkqubo elula, ethe ngqo. Endaweni yoko, ithatha uhlobo lokutsiba okuncinci kunye nokuqala, ixesha lokuphila kakuhle, kunye namanyathelo asecaleni koxinzelelo kunye noxinzelelo.
Kungathatha ixesha lokuphila lonke ukuphola emanxebeni akho ebangelwa yi-narcissist, yiyo loo nto kubalulekile ukuba ube nomonde nesiqu sakho, kunye nenkqubo.
Ndiyathemba ukuba ezi ngcebiso zinokukunceda kuhambo lwakho. Khumbula ukuba awuwedwa, kwaye zininzi iindlela ezahlukeneyo zokufumana uncedo nenkxaso xa kufuneka njalo.
Ukuba awukafumaneki ungumgqirha olungileyo, oko kuhlala kungumbono olungileyo. Kukwakho noluntu lweendaba zosasazo kunye namaqela enkxaso anokuba luncedo.
Nceda uzithobe ngokwakho, kwaye ungaze uthethe ngokwakho ngenkohlakalo efanayo kunye nobubi obenziwe kuwe.
Vumela ukuphilisa kwakho kuthathe nayiphi na indlela efunekayo, kwaye wazi ukuba ilungile, kwaye intle, kwaye ikulungele.
Jonga oku ikhosi ekwi-intanethi yenzelwe ukunceda umntu Philisa kuphatho gadalala .
Cofa apha ukuze ufunde ngakumbi.
Unokuthanda:
