Ihlabathi le-narcissists linzima. Kunye nebala kunye neendidi ezahlukeneyo, kukho iindlela ezahlukeneyo zokuziphatha. Okwangoku, iziphumo zihlala zinjalo ekugqibeleni.
Kwi inqaku elidlulileyo , Ndikwazise amabinzana amathandathu, kwaye nazi ezinye ezintandathu eziza kusikhanyisela kolu hlobo lobuntu lunobunzima.
Umkhankaso weSmear
Umdlalo wonke we-narcissists udlala malunga nolawulo kunye nolawulo. Nje ukuba i-narcissist ingakwazi ukuxoka, ukukopela, ukuxhaphaza, okanye ukungcatsha, kuba ixhoba likwazile ekugqibeleni shiya ubudlelwane , Baza kuphehlelela iphulo lokuthambisa.
Eli phulo lenzelwe uku yenzakalise iqabane labo langaphambili kangangoko kunokwenzeka. Ukusukela ukuba i-narcissist's ethe-ethe (kodwa enkulu) i-ego yonakalisiwe, baya kuyenza le nto ukuze baziphindezele.
Lonke ulwalamano lube malunga nokusebenzisa ixhoba (ngokweemvakalelo, ngokwasemoyeni, ngokwasemoyeni, nangokwezimali) emva koko, xa ixesha lilungile, ukushiya loo mntu komnye umntu ukuze aqalise umjikelo wokuxhatshazwa kwakhona.
Okwangoku umdlalo awuphelanga njengoko bekulindelwe, ke i-narcissist iya kuyilungiselela ngokuzama ukubona ixhoba lonakalisiwe lisebenzisa nayiphi na indlela, netotali ukungabikho kwetyala okanye ukuzisola.
Eminye yemizekelo yephulo smear yile:
- Ukulahla umfanekiso wexhoba emsebenzini ngenjongo yokugxothwa.
- Ukulawula abanye abantu (ababiziweyo iinkawu eziphaphazelayo Ukuxhaphaza okanye ukuhlukumeza ixhoba.
- Ukuxoka kubahlobo abaqhelekileyo malunga nexhoba ukuze ubenze bodwa.
Iliwa eliGrey
Yi le iqhinga elingasebenziyo lokufumana ukukhuselwa kwi-narcissist xa 'kungabikho nxibelelwano' kungenakwenzeka (okt i-narcissist ngumphathi wayo, okanye liqabane langaphambili kunye nomzali emntwaneni wabo).
uyeke njani ukuziva ungoyisile
Ukuziphatha kwe-narcissist kwenzelwa ukufumana impendulo ebantwini. Ukuhamba ngeGrey Rock kuthetha ukuba uyasebenza kwaye unomdla njengoko kunjalo: ilitye elingwevu. Kuthetha ukuba uyadika, unento encinci okanye ungathethi kwaphela, unganiki naluphi na ulwazi lomntu (okanye kancinci ngangokunokwenzeka), kwaye ngokubanzi uziphathe njengomfanekiso ophilayo ongachaphazeli nakweyiphi na into enokubanjiswa ngumnxibelelanisi.
Kunzima ukuyenza ekuqaleni, kodwa iba ngcono ngokuziqhelanisa… kwaye, okona kubaluleke kakhulu, iyasebenza. I-narcissist iyakuqonda ukuba ukucaphukisa kwabo akusayi kwenza mpendulo kwixhoba. Ekugqibeleni, bayakuyeka kwaye badlulele kolunye ujoliso kuba ixhoba alikho 'njengolonwabo' njengangaphambili.
Funda eyethu Isikhokelo esipheleleyo sokuya eGrey Rock apha .
Ukubonelelwa kweNarcissistic
Ndiyazi, kuyavakala kungaqhelekanga. Yintoni le ingaka?
AbakwaNarcissists abanalo uqobo lwangaphakathi abangazazi kakuhle ukuba bangobani kwaye banokuzithemba okuphantsi. Xa bekhulisiwe, kusenokwenzeka ukuba ubuncinci umzali kunye / okanye umnakekeli obaphethe kakubi kakhulu (ukuxhatshazwa ngokwasemphefumlweni kunye / okanye ngokweemvakalelo ngexesha lenxalenye okanye bonke ubuntwana babo) okanye kakuhle kakhulu (cinga “uyinkosi / ukumkanikazi kwaye uya kuhlala ukwazi ukwenza nantoni na oyifunayo - abantu baya kuhlala bekukholisa ”).
Ngenxa yokuba iziqu zabo ezingaphakathi zazingakhuliswanga kakuhle, lonke uzuko lwabo luvela ngaphandle, kwabanye abantu, hayi ngaphakathi kubo. Ke ngoko, baxhomekeke ngokupheleleyo kwabanye abantu nakwinto abazama ukuyifumana kubo. Le yindlela abahlala ngayo besebenza kwaye bengonwabisi.
wwe ngemvulo ebusuku amagqabantshintshi aluhlaza
Unikezelo lwe-narcissistic kwimeko nganye luxhomekeke ekubeni zeziphi iimfuno zobuqu ekufuneka zifezekisiwe ngomnye umntu. Ezona zinto zixhaphakileyo ze-narcissistic zezi: ukutya, isondo, uthando, indawo yokuhlala, imali, ukunconywa, ingqalelo namandla. Olu nikezelo luhlala lunikezelwa ngabantu abangaphezu komnye ngexesha nokuba besazi okanye bengazi.
AbakwaNarcissist baququzelela ubomi babo malunga noku kunikezelwa kwaye bahlala benabanye abantu esele bebonelela ngalo - okanye kwipayipi - kwimeko apho umthombo wabo ophambili ungaphumeleliyo ngokungalindelekanga, okanye bayadinwa 'kukubonelelwa okudala.'
Ukufunda okubaluleke ngakumbi kwe-narcissist (inqaku liyaqhubeka ngezantsi):
- Izinto ezi-8 i-Narcissist ayinakuze ikwenzele yona (okanye nabani na ongomnye)
- ICoververt Narcissist: Iintloni, iintlobo eziNgenisiweyo zinokuba ziiNarcissists
- Indlela yokujongana neNarcissist: Ekuphela kwendlela eQinisekisiweyo yokuSebenza
- I-Rollercoaster yokubuyisela kwimeko yesiqhelo kwiNarcissistic Abuse
- Iimpawu ze-6 oJongene ne-Narcissist eModareyitha (kodwa ke uyiNarcissist)
- Indlela yeGrey Rock yokujongana ne-Narcissist xa kungekho nxu lumano ayisiyiyo inketho
Ukudibana kwengozi
Isifo seStockholm ifumana igama layo ekuphangeni ebhankini eSweden ngo-1973. Abathinjwa abaninzi ababebandakanyeke kuphango baphela bekhusela kunye / okanye benolwalamano nabaqweqwedisi babo. I-Stockholm Syndrome yenzeka xa umntu othathe inxaxheba ekuthinjweni ekhula ngokudibana kunye nomthimbi.
Ukubopha umothuko kuyafana neStockholm Syndrome. Amaxhoba aneemvakalelo ezinzulu kunye nezomeleleyo ngabakwa-narcissists abakubudlelwane nabo. AmaNarcissist ngamanye amaxesha ayawaphatha kakuhle amaxhoba kwaye ngamanye amaxesha awaphathe kakubi.
Iziphumo zokudibana koxinzelelo kwingqondo yexhoba ziyafana kakhulu nokuba likhoboka leziyobisi. Baxhamla umjikelo zokulungileyo (ukonwaba) nokungalunganga (ukwenzakala):
- Ulonwabo yenzeka ngohlobo, umzekelo, thanda ibhombu , ukuncoma, okanye isini esilungileyo (esivelisa i-oxytocin kwingqondo yabo, ekwabizwa ngokuba yihormone yolonwabo).
- Yenzakele yenzeka ngohlobo lokuxhatshazwa, ukubeka-phantsi, nokwenza ubuqili ukubiza nje ezimbalwa (zonke ezo zinto zivelisa i-cortisol kwingqondo yexhoba ihormone yoxinzelelo elumkisa ngengozi).
Lo mjikelo wezinto ezimbi ezingalunganga, ezilungileyo nezingalunganga,… zezona zinto zibangela ukuba amaxhoba abambelele kubudlelwane kwaye sesona sizathu siphambili sokuba kube nzima kubo ukuba baphume kuwo ngokulungileyo. Kuya kufuneka bayeke ukuphatha gadalala ngokungathi yicocaine.
Ubudlelwane kunye narcissists zezi rollercoasters ngokweemvakalelo ngeemvakalelo ezinzulu kakhulu, kunye nedrama eninzi kunye nokungazinzi. Abantu abakhulele kwiintsapho ezingasebenzi kakuhle abanomzali omnye obandakanyekayo babandakanyeka kolu hlobo lwamandla ebuntwaneni babo. Bafunda ukuba olu luthando. Ke ngoko, olo hlobo lobudlelwane yile nto baya kuyikhangela ngokungazi abantu abadala, bengazi ngoxhatshazo. Ubudlelwane 'obuqhelekileyo' buhlala bubonakala bukruqula kwaye buthe tyaba.
Ixhoba lizibiza ngokuthi “Sigqithe kwizinto ezininzi kunye,” xa umxhaphazi inguye obeka ixhoba kubo bonke ubunzima kunye neembandezelo, ngaphandle kokuziva enetyala okanye ukuzisola ngokwenza njalo.
Unxantathu
Unxantathu sisimo esinamandla esinetyhefu kunxibelelwano oluthe ngqo kunye nokuziphatha okubandakanya abantu abathathu. Ezona mpawu ziphambili zonxantathu zezi isenzo sokufihla, inkohliso kunye nokuxhatshazwa. Kwenzeka xa umntu omnye ehlasela, ehlambalaza, kunye / okanye ehlukumeza omnye ngokusebenzisana nomntu wesithathu (esazi okanye engazi).
Inkqubo ye- Karpman Drama Unxantathu , Eyenziwe nguStephen Karpman ngo-1968 kwaye isetyenziswa ngokubanzi kwizengqondo nakwindlela yokusebenza kwengqondo, imephu yokunxibelelana okwenzakalisayo okwenzeka phakathi kwabantu abakungquzulwano. Inabalinganiswa abathathu: ixhoba, uMtshutshisi, kunye noMhlanguli.
- Ixhoba : Uziva ngathi ubomi okanye abanye abantu babaphatha kakubi, kwaye abafanelanga. Okwangoku, akukho nto bayenzayo ukuzisusa kuloo meko.
- Umtshutshisi Kukulandela abanye abantu ngokuthe ngqo okanye ngokungathanga ngqo ukubenzakalisa, ukufundisa isifundo okanye ukohlwaya.
- UMhlanguli : ucinga ukuba abanye abantu (ngesiqhelo iqabane lakhe) abanakuphila ebomini ngaphandle kwakhe. UMhlanguli ucinga ukuba xa esindisa omnye umntu, uyazisindisa yena.
Kubudlelwane ne-narcissist, kungekudala unxantathu uhlala usenzeka. AbakwaNarcissist basebenzisa unxantathu njengesixhobo sokubonisa amandla nolawulo.
Lo ngunxantathu kwintloko ye-narcissist: Nguye uliXhoba. Iqabane lakhe langoku (unikezelo oludala lwe-narcissistic) ngumtshutshisi. Isithandwa sakhe (unikezelo olutsha lwe-narcissistic) nguMhlanguli.
Le yeyona nguqulelo yokwenyani: i-narcissist nguMtshutshisi. Iqabane langoku (ubonelelo oludala lwe-narcissistic) liXhoba (kwaye uhlala enguMhlanguli, naye). Isithandwa esitsha kukubandakanya nje i-narcissist (nokuba uyayazi le nto okanye hayi).
Ibukusa
Kuba ii-narcissists azinabuntu bokwenene bangaphakathi, bona nxiba iimaski Ukuze ufumane unikezelo lwe-narcissistic ebantwini. Enye yeendlela abazisebenzisayo ukurhwebesha abantu kukubukisa. Bahlala besebenzisa ukubukisa (okuyiflegi enkulu ebomvu ukuyilumkela) kunye namaqabane amatsha, bezenza ngathi bayimiphefumlo yamawele 'umdlalo owenziwe ezulwini.'
Ukuba, masithi, ixhoba elinokubakho belisoloko lifuna ukuya ePeru, emva koko ngesiquphe iba luhambo lwamaphupha e-narcissist, nawo. Ukuba ucinga ngokutyikityela izifundo ze-swing, yeyiphi na into engahambelaniyo kuba i-narcissist ikwanenjongo yokwenza oko! Ukuba ungumthandi weemovie ezindala, i-narcissist iya kuthi, ngequbuliso, ibe nengqokelela epheleleyo kwindawo yayo.
Imibongo ngobomi nokufa kothandekayo
Yonke le nto ayiyonyani kwaye iyimbonakalo yenyani ye-narcissist iya kuzama nje ukulungela ityala njenge 'qabane elifanelekileyo' lexhoba ukuze libakhohlise kulwalamano. Balunge kakhulu kwisipili kuba bayakwazi ukukhawulezisa babize ulwazi oluninzi kwaye emva koko badlale indima yokwenza ukuba ixhoba licinge ukuba “yiyo le. Ndifumene uthando lobomi bam. ”
Ngaba la mabinzana amatsha kuwe? Ngaba bayanceda ukucacisa ezinye zezinto kwixa elidlulileyo (okanye langoku) ubudlelwane ebomini bakho? Shiya iikhomenti ezingezantsi.
