Ukuba ubukhe wathandana (okanye utshatile) kunye narcissist, ke ngokungathandabuzekiyo uyazi kakuhle isixa esikhulu somonakalo abanokubangela. Banobukrakra ngakumbi xa bedityaniswa neemfesane, njengoko bekhulisa impilo engenampilo ukuxhomekeka , kodwa ubudlelwane obuqhelekileyo kunye ne-narc bunokubangela umthwalo opheleleyo wokuzithemba, uxinzelelo, ixhala , kwaye kubi.
Abanye abantu-okt abo baziqinisekisileyo ukuba bayalithanda iqabane labo le-narcissist kwaye bafuna ukuzama ukwenza izinto zisebenze nabo-bacinga ukuba ukuya kwizibini ezincedisana kuya kuyiphucula imeko.
ronda rousey vs alexa ulonwabo
Bakholelwa kwelokuba ukuba banokuqinisekisa i-narc ebomini babo ukuba bafune unyango kunye nabo, ke baya kuba ngumlingane ogqibeleleyo abanokubanakho ukuba.
Hayi ngekhe.
Hayi, ayizukwenzeka, kwaye ungagqibela uzive ubi kakhulu emva kweseshoni yonyango okanye isihlanu kunangaphambili ngaphambi kokuba uzame. Nasi isizathu.
Ngumdlalo Kubo
Kwimeko apho ungakhange uqaphele, ii-narcissists zizilwanyana ezinomtsalane kwaye iinkosi zokukhohlisa . Ukuba bavumile ukuya kunyango kunye nawe, kungenxa yokuba kuyonwabisa ukuba benze njalo.
Badlala kunye nawe njengezinto zokudlala zekati ezinemouse, bayivumele ukuba iqhube ngokukhululekileyo ngaphambi kokuyibetha, baphinde bayiphinde okwethutyana: inika imouse (wena) ithemba lokuba izinto ziya kuba ngcono ngaphambi kokuchitha amathemba kwakhona. Ngamazipho abo.
Uyakhumbula ukuba bakuthandile njani ekuqaleni kobudlelwane bakho? Uwele nzima kangakanani ngenxa yokuziphatha kwabo? Ewe, abanyangi ngabantu nabo, kwaye abanakuhlala bebona ngokusebenzisa ubuqili be-narcissist.
Yonke into oyinyusayo iyakuguqulwa njengoko i-narc ebomini bakho izama ukubonisa le ngcali ukuba woyike kangakanani. Nokuba uthini na okanye ungazama kangakanani na ukuba amava kunye neemvakalelo zakho ziqinisekiswe, i-narc iya kuyiguqula ukuze babe lixhoba, kwaye kufuneka ufumane amayeza ukuze uyeke ukwenza 'njengempambano', okanye uya kunika ukuzama ukuzama ukubuyela ebomini bakho, ukugcina imeko ekuyo ngoku.
Nokuba yeyiphi na indlela, bayaphumelela.
Ukukhanyisa ngegesi Ngoncedo lwe The Therapist
Enye into eqhelekileyo eyenzekayo xa i-narc irhuqelwa kunyango lwezibini (njengoko kuchaziwe apha ngasentla) ukuba baphela befumana unyango kwicala labo, kwaye bayadibana ngokuchasene nawe.
Uya kuzama ngamandla ukwenza ukuba i-Therapist iqonde umbono wakho kwaye uchaze ukuba iqabane lakho linjani ekhaya, kwaye uthe iqabane liza kujongeka lilusizi kwaye lonzakalise, kwaye bathulule iintliziyo zabo malunga nokuba ukhohlakele kwaye awunabulungisa kubo, kwaye wenza njani phezulu amabali ukuze ubenzakalise, kwaye uzame ukufumana ingqalelo okanye usizi ngobuqhetseba bakho.
Khawufane ucinge ukuba imeko izakujongeka njani kunyango lwakho: nantso ke, udidekile kwaye uyindoda kwaye mhlawumbi usondele kwi-hysterics, uthandazela ukuba umntu ekugqibeleni akuphulaphule kwaye akholwe ngalo lonke uxhatshazo othe wenziwa kulo, kunye neqabane lakho le-narc ubonakala elusizi kwaye edimazekile.
Unokuba unayo i-PTSD kwaye ungaphulukana ne-sh * t yakho ngexesha leeseshoni kuba ungokoqobo esiphelweni sentambo yakho, kodwa endaweni yokwenza ukuba ubonakale unyanisekile kwaye ufuna uncedo, indlela yokuziphatha enxanelweyo iya kukupeyinta njengongazinzanga umenzi wobubi kule ntsebenziswano ingekho mpilweni.
Ingcali iya kukukhalimela ngokuziphatha kwakho okungalunganga, kwaye iya kukubuza ukuba kutheni ungenangqiqo kumntu ocacileyo ukuba unomdla kuwe, kwaye uyonzakala kwizityholo zakho ezingenabulungisa.
Okubi nangakumbi kukungakholelwa ngumntu omvulele isithuko kungcikivwa ngabo, ngakumbi xa inguwe obesokola ezandleni zomntu ophethe gadalala. Oku kunokubangela umonakalo omkhulu wexesha elide, ngelixa iqabane lakho le-narc lisineka ngenxa yokuba ubuthathaka kwaye uthandabuzekile kangangokuba awukwazi nokwenza unyango ngokuchanekileyo.
U-sam smith kunye no-ed sheeran
Ukunyaniseka Ngokwenene Kunokuba Yingozi
Ukuba iqabane lakho le-narcissist belikuthetha kakhulu, ngokweemvakalelo, kunye / okanye ngokukuhlukumeza ekhaya, kusenokwenzeka ukuba uye wathula malunga naloo nto ngenxa yokoyika.
Ukuba kunyango kunye neqabane lakho kunokukwenza uzive ngathi unendawo ekhuselekileyo yokuvulelwa olo xhatshazo kuba unaye umntu okholelwayo kwaye akukhusele… kodwa ngaphandle kokuba wena neqabane lakho nihlala ngokwahlukana, niza Kufuneka ndibuyele ekhaya kunye nabo emva kweseshoni yokucebisa, kwaye kunokubakho isihogo sokuhlawula.
Gcina ukhumbula ukuba ii-narcissists ziyakudela ukupeyintwa 'njengembi' bonke ubukho bazo bujolise ekuxatyisweni nasekuthandweni, ke ukuba uza ucocekile malunga nokuziphatha kwabo okungathandekiyo kunye namacandelo onyango kunye nawe endaweni yabo, ngokungathandabuzekiyo uya kuthwala ubunzima bokutsha kwabo. Ubushushu ngokukhawuleza ukuvalwa kocango lwakho lwangaphambili emva kwakho.
ukwenza into ongafuniyo ukuyenza
Umsindo wabo unokunyuka ngaphezulu kunokuba ucinga, kwaye endaweni yokuphosa nje indlela yakho, ungaphelela ekubeni ufumane isiphatho sobundlobongela (okanye izoyikiso zoko). Nditsho namaqabane e-narc angakhange abenakho ukuhlukumeza kwixa elidlulileyo anokuxhokonxwa ekubeni nobundlongondlongo kunye nobundlobongela ukuba baziva ngathi ugqithile kumanqaku kwaye wazama ukwenza abanye bakholelwe izinto ezimbi ngabo.
Ukufunda okubaluleke ngakumbi kwe-narcissist (inqaku liyaqhubeka ngezantsi):
- Indlela yeGrey Rock yokujongana ne-Narcissist xa kungekho nxu lumano ayisiyiyo inketho
- ICoververt Narcissist: Iintloni, iintlobo eziNgenisiweyo zinokuba ziiNarcissists
- Izinto ezi-8 i-Narcissist ayinakuze ikwenzele yona (okanye nabani na ongomnye)
- I-Rollercoaster yokubuyisela kwimeko yesiqhelo kwiNarcissistic Abuse
- Iikhonkco ezi-5 ezisetyenziswa ngabaNarcissist ukukugcina ubuya kwakhona
- Zithini Iinkawu ezibhabhayo ezenzela iiNarcissists (kunye nendlela yokuziKhusela)
Akukho nto iya kutshintsha
Enye yeendlela eziza kusetyenziswa ngunosisi ukuba bayavuma ukufumana unyango kukwenza ngathi bayamxhasa kwaye bathathe ingcebiso yonyango. Banokubonisa ukuzisola 'kokwenyani', benze amanye amabali malunga nobuntwana babo obuhlekisayo ukuze bafumane uvelwano oluvela kuwe nakwingcali, kwaye babonakale ngathi bazinikele ngokwenene ekwenzeni izinto zibengcono phakathi kwakho.
Kwakhona, oku kunesiphumo sokukulahlekisa ngengqondo engeyiyo yokhuseleko. Banokunyuka kwaye batshintshe babe ngcono (okwexeshana), bakunike umbono wokuba bafuna ngokunyanisekileyo ukutshintsha ukuze babe liqabane elikufaneleyo ukuba ngumntu olunge ngakumbi kuwe, nakubo ngokwabo…
… Kwaye kamsinya nje ukuba uyeke unogada wakho kwaye uqalise ukubathemba kwakhona, nokuba kukancinci, loo façade iya kulahla kwaye baya kubuyela kwiindlela zabo.
Kutheni kunjalo? Kungenxa yokuba abanakho ukutshintsha abo bangoongaphezu kwakho.
Awunakho ukuguqula ngomlingo ube liqabane elifanelekileyo elinjenge-chameleon eliza kutshintsha kwaye licwenge ukuba liqabane labo elifanelekileyo ngalo lonke ixesha ukutshintsha kweminqweno yabo, kwaye abanakuba liqabane elithembekileyo nelithembekileyo elikuthanda ngokwenene.
Ngomntu osebenzisa i-narcissist, ubakhona ukuze bafumane uncedo lwabo, kwaye kube lula kubo, kwaye baya kuzama ukukukhohlisa kuwo onke amacala ukuze bafumane into abayifunayo. Oku kubandakanya ukudlala umdlalo wonyango ukuba kukwenza ube nomdla ngakumbi ekuhambeni kwexesha.
Zinyamekele ngokwakho, kuqala kunye nokuphambili
Unyango lubaluleke kakhulu. Ngokwenene, kunjalo. Akukho namnye kuthi ongenayo imicimbi, kwaye ukuba usindile kubambiswano lwexesha elide elikushiye wonakele kwaye udimazekile, kuya kuba kukulungele ukufumana umntu olungileyo, onamandla onokumthemba.
Ixesha elingaphezulu, banokukunceda wakhe ukuzithemba kwakho kunye namandla oovimba bakho, kwaye usebenze ebomini obufanelwe.
Isitshixo apha kukuba ufune olu nyango ndedwa .
Kuya kufuneka uzenzele wena kuqala, kwaye ujonge impilo yakho kunye nolonwabo. Uninzi lwethu luye lwacwangciswa ukuba luthathele ingqalelo njengobugovu, kodwa ngokwenene ngumcimbi wokuzikhusela kunye nokuzinyamekela. Fumana i-Therapist enamava nabantu abane-PTSD Ukuphathwa gadalala , kwaye uzibophelele ekubavumeleni bakuncede ulungelelanise ubomi bakho.
Xa kuziwa kubudlelwane obunothando kunye nomnxibelelanisi, inye kuphela inyathelo onokulithatha eliya kuqinisekisa impilo yakho yekamva: ukubaleka, nokuphosa iziqhushumbisi emagxeni akho ukuze zingakulandeli.
indlela yokuziva unetyala ngokukopa
