'Ubume' lelinye lala magama abonakala ngathi avelile kumaxesha akutshanje…
… Intsingiselo ngasemva kwayo, nangona kunjalo, ibikhona kangangeminyaka.
Ukuba awuqinisekanga ukuba ibhekisa kwintoni, funda kwaye siza kuchaza yonke into, kubandakanya nendlela yokujamelana nayo ukuba uzifumana ukwenye.
Ke yintoni imeko?
Eli linamaqhinga xa kufikwa kwinkcazo ngqo, njengoko bonke ubudlelwane nokunxibelelana kububuntu kwabo babandakanyekayo.
Ngokubanzi, nangona kunjalo, ichaza loo limbo ingaqhelekanga xa ukunye nomntu kodwa hayi ngenene nge kubo.
… Niyathandana kwaye nindawonye, anikho kunye nje.
…Unga be ekhethekileyo , kodwa awubeki iilebhile kuyo.
… Kukho iimvakalelo ezichaphazelekayo, kodwa azikaxoxwa.
… Awucingi ngokwahlukana, kodwa awukathethi ngekamva kunye.
Udidekile? Nathi!
Yeyiphi imiqondiso yemeko?
Ke, ukusuka kwintshayelelo engathandekiyo, uyazi njani ukuba ukwiimeko?
Le yimiqondiso embalwa ekufuneka ujonge kuyo…
1. Kuyinto elula. Ukwenzela bona.
Rhoqo, iimeko ezithandwayo zithanda umntu omnye kunenye.
Bona unako zibe luncedo macala onke, kodwa zihlala zilungele umntu omnye kwaye, ukuba ufunda le, mhlawumbi awunguye loo mntu.
Abanye abantu, banikezela ngokusondelelana nolwalamano ngaphandle koxinzelelo lokuzinikela.
Leyo inokuba yimeko efanelekileyo kumntu okonwabelayo ukuba kunye nomntu othile, kodwa angafuni ukudlala intsimi.
Banokonwaba ukuba kunye nomntu omnye ngaphandle kokubeka iileyibhile kuyo nayiphi na into.
2. Akukho zibhile.
Ngokuqinisekileyo akunjalo.
Oku akusoloko kungumqondiso wendlela abantu ababini abavakalelwa ngayo ngomnye nomnye, njengoko kunokubakho iimvakalelo ezinamandla kunye nolwalamano olusenyongweni olubandakanyekayo ngaphandle kokubonakala ngathi kukungabikho kokuzinikela.
Kusenokwenzeka ukuba ningabhekiselelani omnye komnye ‘njengesihlobo’ okanye ‘ntombi,’ kodwa kucacisiwe.
3. Ubomi bakho bobuqu abuhambelani ngokwenene.
Oku kuhlala kwenzeka kwiintsuku zokuqala zokuthandana, kuba kunokuba nzima ukugweba xa uzisa umntu ebomini bakho.
Ukwahlukana kunye nokubuyelana kwakhona amaxesha amaninzi
Usachitha ixesha kunye kwaye wonwabele ukuxhoma ngaphandle, awunakulinganiswa nobomi bolunye ulwalamano.
Oku akuthethi ukuba abenzi njalo Ndifuna ukwazisa kubahlobo okanye kusapho lwabo, kusenokuthetha ukuba ayiloxesha elililo okwangoku.
4. Ume ngxi.
Ngokusisiseko, awuthethi malunga ukwehlukana , kodwa kananjalo anixoxi ngekamva.
kutheni ndiziva ngoluhlobo ngaye
Kwakhona, sibuyele kuloo limbo!
Impembelelo yoku iyahluka ngokwenyani phakathi kwabantu, njengoko abanye bekufumanisa kunzima ukujongana nabanye kwaye bonwabile ukuyithatha imihla ngemihla.
Kwakhona, oku akusoloko kubonakalisa indlela oziva ngayo omnye komnye zizinto nje eziyiyo.
5. Ivaliwe, kodwa vula.
Awuboni abanye abantu, kodwa kananjalo awuhambi ncam kwimihla yokwenyani kunye.
Kungenzeka ukuba nibonane kuphela ebusuku okanye xa nobabini nidikiwe kwaye nilahlekile kwezinye izicwangciso.
Oku kunokuba luncedo kuni nobabini, kunjalo, kodwa luphawu lokuba awutshatanga, kodwa kananjalo awudibananga!
Ngaba yile nto uyifunayo?
Ngoku ukuba usungule ukuba ukwimeko ethile, lixesha lokuba usebenze ngendlela oziva ngayo ngayo.
Kungenzeka ukuba sele uyayazi le meko, okanye usenokuba nomzuzwana nje wokuqonda!
Kubalulekile ukuba uqaphele ukuba oku akuzenzekeli ngokuzenzekelayo kwaye akusoloko ukuphela kobudlelwane bakho nomntu.
Eli nqanaba le-limbo lenzeka kubudlelwane obuninzi ngexesha lesiqalo esingaqhelekanga.
Kuya kufuneka ukuba usebenze ukuba wonwabile yindlela izinto eziyiyo okanye ukuba ufuna ukuba iqhubele phambili iye kwenye into engaphezulu.
Abantu abaninzi bonwabile luhlobo lokuzibophelela okungaqhelekanga okunokunikwa yimeko.
Ufumana amasuntswana amnandi (ukubambana ngezandla, imiyalezo emnandi, kunye nokonwaba kokuchitha ixesha nomntu) ngaphandle kokuzibophelela okanye uxinzelelo lokuba 'sikunye.'
Abanye abantu, oku kuninzi ngokwaneleyo kwaye akukho mfuneko okanye umnqweno wokuba ibe ngaphezulu.
Oku kufana nokuhamba kweeholide - kukho inqanaba lokusondelana, kodwa akukho namnye kuni obeka uxinzelelo kuyo ukuba ibe yinto engaphezulu.
Kwabanye, eli nqanaba linokungazalisekisi kwaye kunokuba njalo Ukuxhalabisa .
Ukuba unethemba lokuba izinto ziya kuqhubeka kubudlelwane, ixesha lokulinda lingakhohlisa ngokwenene.
Awazi ukuba umi phi, awuqinisekanga yintoni imida (ungabamba izandla esidlangalaleni kwaye ubazisa njani ukuba ungena kubantu obaziyo?!), Kwaye ushiyeke uziva ungazinzanga.
Usenokuzibuza ukuba kutheni bengafuni ukwenza izinto ezisemthethweni kunye nawe, kodwa uzama ukuyidlala ipholile kwaye ungabi 'yile ntombazana / mfo' obalekisa izinto kwaye abeke uxinzelelo kungekudala!
Unokuthanda (inqaku liyaqhubeka ngezantsi):
- Iimpawu ezi-10 ezifihlakeleyo zomntu onemicimbi yokuzibophelela
- Iimpawu ze-12 zobudlelwane obuzibophelelayo (+ 6 izinto zithetha oko kuwe)
- Umahluko ophambili ophakathi kwenkanuko nothando
- Wenze Ntoni Ngolwalamano Olungenalo Ulwalamano kunye noQhagamshelo
- Kuthatha ixesha elingakanani ukuthandana?
- Umahluko ophakathi kwe-6 phakathi kokuthanda umntu nokuba sethandweni
Wenzani ngoku?
Ukuba wonwabile ngendlela ezenzeka ngayo izinto, kwaye ucinga ukuba omnye umntu unjalo, qhubeka.
Akukho hlazo ekuboneni oko abanye abantu bakubona njengobudlelwane obungaqhelekanga ukuba nobabini niyonwabile.
KODWA… ukuba uziva ungonwabanga, kufuneka uthethe ngayo.
Ewe, usenokufuna ukubonakala uqhelekile kwaye ungakhathali, kodwa ukuba iyakutya kwaye awukwazi ukonwabela izinto ngokufanelekileyo, kufuneka ube nencoko evulekileyo.
Zama ukuba ungakhathazeki kakhulu xa uzisa le nto - akukubi ukuba neemvakalelo, kodwa kunokuba nzima kakhulu, ngakumbi ukuba omnye umntu akalindelanga ukuba incoko yenzeke kwasekuqaleni!
Qhubeka ufunda ezinye zeengcebiso ngokuthatha izinto ukuya kwinqanaba elilandelayo, kwaye kufuneka wenze ntoni ukuba uyaqonda phaya ngu akukho nqanaba elilandelayo…
izinto ezihlekisayo onokuzithetha ngawe
Uhamba njani ukusuka kwimeko ukuya kubudlelwane.
Ukuthatha isigqibo sokuba ufuna okungakumbi kumntu ohleli naye kunokuba yinto enomdla, kodwa kunokuba yinto eyoyikisayo xa ungaqinisekanga ukuba baziva njani.
Vula ngokuphandle kwaye uthembeke kunxibelelwano lwakho, kodwa ungagqithisi!
Kukho iindlela zokuthetha malunga nale nto uyifunayo ngaphandle kokuvakala ngokungathi uphakamisa umtshato kunye nomtshato odibeneyo.
Ungaqala ngokuthetha ngendlela wena zive.
Kuko konke okwaziyo, banokuba baziva ngendlela efanayo kwaye banokuba neentloni kakhulu ukuyikhankanya kwimeko apho benokwaliwa.
Yiba nesibindi uze ubaxelele ukuba uyakonwabela ukuchitha ixesha kunye nabo kwaye awunamdla wokuthandana nomnye umntu okwangoku.
Jonga indlela abaphendula ngayo kwaye baqhubeke ukuba uziva unethemba ukuza kuthi ga ngoku.
Unokuthi ungathanda ukutyelela igalari okanye uye kwindawo oyithandayo yebrunch ngexesha elizayo xa ubabona - le yindlela yokugcina esecaleni, indlela eqhelekileyo yokuchitha ixesha nabo emini.
Ukuba uyafuna, xela ukuba iqela labahlobo libamba iziselo ngempelaveki ukuba bafuna ukujoyina.
Oku ubenza bazi ukuba ufuna ukuba babandakanyeke ngakumbi ebomini bakho ngaphandle kokubeka ngqo uxinzelelo.
Kuxhomekeke kwindlela ezihamba ngayo izinto, ungaqala ukwenza izicwangciso ezikhulu zamaxesha kwikamva elikufutshane.
Ungaqali ukucwangcisa iinyanga ezintandathu ngaphambili, kodwa yenze icace into yokuba ubonakala njengesixhobo esihle ebomini bakho kwaye ubabona besabalulekile kuwe kwiiveki ezimbalwa ezizayo.
Kwakhona, oku asikokuzinikela, njengoko kunjalo, kodwa kubonisa umdla.
Konke oku kuya kukhokelela ekubeni uchithe imali ngakumbi kunye kuseto olusenyongweni.
Khumbula ukuba ukusondelelana asikokuncamisana nje nokubambana ngezandla - kuhlala nje kubandakanyeka kubomi babanye kunye nokuhlonipha ubukho bomntu.
Ungabonisa ukuba ukhathalele ngeendlela ezincinci apha endleleni (ukubaphosa umyalezo xa usazi ukuba banentlanganiso enkulu okanye kwenzeke into enomdla) kwaye kungenzeka ukuba baqale ukwenza okufanayo.
Okukhona ubandakanyeka kubomi babanye, kokukhona baya kuqala ukuqonda ukuba kufanelekile ukuba yinto engaphezulu okanye bafuna ukuthatha inyathelo.
Ukuba abaziva, nantsi into oyenzayo ukwenza izinto zibe lula kuwe ...
Uhamba nini.
Ukwazi ixesha lokuyibiza ngokuba ngumhla kunzima kwiinkalo ezininzi zobomi bethu, ukusuka ekupheliseni ubuhlobo obunetyhefu ukuya ekuyekeni imisebenzi esenza sibe lusizi.
Ukuphuma kubudlelwane, okanye imeko, engakufezekisiyo kwahlukile.
Ukuba uthathe la manyathelo angentla kwaye baqala ukwenza suka kude , musa ukuwunyanzela.
Akufuneki ukuba utyhale okanye ukhohlise umntu ukuba afune ukuba nawe!
Nokuba iyasebenza, iyakwenza kuphela ukuba uzive ungakhuselekanga ukuba uhlala nabo kwaye uqhubeke kwimeko…
nini ukuchitha ubudlelwane bexesha elide
… Ungaziva ngathi bayakucaphukela ngokuzama ukwenza okungakumbi koku unakho, okanye ungaziva ungonwabanga ukuba phakathi kwabo njengoko uziva ngathi ucekisiwe.
Nokuba yeyiphi indlela, lixesha lokuba uhambe kwaye ushiye izinto zodwa.
Banokutshintsha iingqondo xa sele benendawo yokuphefumla, kodwa, okwangoku, luphawu lokuba kufuneka uqhubeke!
Musa ukubalinda kwaye ubeke izinto kwi-off-chance baya kuguqula ingqondo yakho, kodwa baphelise izinto kwinqaku elinobuhlobo ukuze nibe nobuntu xa kunokwenzeka nibonane.
Ukuba ufuna ukuzibophelela ngakumbi kwaye abekho kuyo, luphawu lokuba abakulungelanga.
Kunokuba nzima ngokwenene ukwamkela ukuba umntu omthandayo akafuni into efana neyakho, kodwa ayisosiphelo sehlabathi.
Usenokujonga ngasemva kuyo ngothando kwaye uyibone njengesifundo.
Ngokuqinisekileyo, kungathatha isikhalo kunye neencoko ezininzi kunye nabahlobo bakho, kodwa uyakufika kwinqanaba apho unokubona indawo yokukhula komntu.
Ekupheleni kosuku, awuvumanga ukuzinzisa into oyaziyo ukuba ayikusebenzeli kwaye kufuneka uzingce ngaloo nto.
Enye yezona zinto zibuhlungu kuxa abantu besamkela ngaphantsi kunoko bakufunayo (kwaye kufanelekile), kwaye eso sigqibo sihlala siphenjelelwa luloyiko- uloyiko lokwaliwa okanye ukoyika ukuba wedwa.
Nokuba yeyiphi na indlela, ngokubuza into oyifunayo kwaye uhambe xa ingalunganga, unesibindi esimangalisayo kwaye ubeka wena kuqala-kwaye olo luhlobo lothando esicinga ukuba lolona lubalaseleyo.
Ngaba awuqinisekanga ukuba ungayenza njani imeko ozifumana ukuyo? Thetha kwi-Intanethi kwingcali yobudlelwane kwi-Relationship Hero enokukunceda ufumane izinto. Ngokulula.
Eli phepha linamalungu onxibelelwano. Ndifumana ikhomishini encinci ukuba ukhetha ukuthenga nantoni na emva kokucofa kuyo.
