Abanye abantu babonakala ngathi abafuni ukukhula. Bajonge kanye kwithemba lokuba ngabantu abadala abaqolileyo kwaye bathathe isigqibo… nah, ayiyonto yabo.
Ngoku, sikhe sachukumisa ngaphambili Isifo sikaPeter Pan (aka 'manolescents') kwaye olo hlobo lokuziphatha lubonakala njani kwipesenti ethile yabemi, kodwa okwangoku asikangeni ngoba oku kuyenzeka.
Kunokwenzeka ukuba phantse sonke siyamazi umntu owalayo ukukhula: ayisiyiyo into enqunyelwe kwiminyaka ethile yobudala, isini, okanye imvelaphi yobuhlanga, kodwa inokuchaphazela abantu abavela kuzo zonke iindlela ezahlukeneyo zobomi.
Yinto nje… ukuthotywa okupheleleyo kwe ukukhula , nabantu bekhetha ukuqhubeka nokuziphatha, kwanokunxiba, ngendlela abenza ngayo ebusheni babo.
Yintoni ebangela oku kuziphatha? Kutheni le nto uninzi lwabantu lunyanzelisa ekuziphatheni njengabantwana kwaye ngokungathandabuzekiyo benqaba ukukhula?
Makhe sijonge kwizinto ezimbalwa ezinegalelo.
1. Bayoyika Ukuzimela kunye no-Aloneness
Ukwenza izigqibo isiqu sakho singangcangcazela ngokumangalisayo, kwaye abantu abaninzi bayalukhetha olo hlobo loxanduva ngokwala ukunqamla amaqhina omzali nomntwana abonwabileyo kuwo.
Abantu abaninzi bafuna ukhuseleko, intuthuzelo, kunye nokuqinisekiswa ukuba benza ukhetho olufanelekileyo kwaye ukwenza izinto kakuhle Ukuqinisekiswa okuvela ngokubanzi kumzali okanye kumcebisi.
Ukuba abantu abathathi manyathelo kwinkululeko yobuqu, abanakuze babe nokuzithemba kumandla abo okuphila ubomi ngokwabo.
2. Ukukhula = Akusekho Mnandi
Abanye abantu bajonga abantwana kwaye babamonele ukungakhathali nokuziphatha kwabo.
Abantwana rhoqo phila ngokupheleleyo ngalo mzuzu , kwaye abasindwa zizo zonke iinkxalabo eziza nokuba ngabantu abadala.
ukonwabela izinto ezilula ebomini
Xa bedanisa ejikeleza engceni okanye bechitha iiyure bezoba imifanekiso, abayikhathazi into yokubambisa okanye yokubuyisa irhafu okanye ukucinga ngamanqanaba echolesterol.
Bayonwaba nje, kwaye yinto enomtsalane ngendlela emangalisayo ukuba abantu bayiqonde.
Abaninzi bacinga ukuba bakuba bekhulile, abanakukwazi ukuntywiliselwa kukushiya ngovuyo olo hlobo, kodwa endaweni yoko babanjiswe kukuhlaselwa okungapheliyo koxanduva lwabantu abadala.
Okanye, okubi ngakumbi, banokuvunyelwa kuphela ukuba babenento ekuthiwa 'yonwabisayo' abantu abadala ekufanele ukuba babe nayo, njengokudlala igalufa ngeempelaveki, okanye ukuba namaqela ebhodi yomdlalo kunye nabamelwane, apho wonke umntu ekhalaza nge-sciatica yabo.
Oku kuphelile, kunjalo.
Umntu unokonwaba ngokungalawulekiyo nakweyiphi na iminyaka, kwaye unokungena kuzo naziphi na izinto ezenza umphefumlo wabo ukhanye. Kuya kufuneka balungelelanise oko kunye noxanduva lobomi, kwaye olo ngcelele yinto uninzi lwabo olukhaba ngayo.
3. Imbalwa imizekelo efanelekileyo yoLonwabo lwabantu abadala
Kwimithombo yeendaba edumileyo, ngaba unokucinga ngemizekelo embalwa apho abantu abadala babonwa ngendlela elungileyo?
Kwiinkqubo zeTV nakwimiboniso bhanyabhanya, uninzi lwabantu abadala lubonwa njengamaqokobhe angaphangeliyo, okanye izinto ezihlekisayo, ngelixa abantu abatsha bekhaliphile kwaye banexesha lobomi babo.
Abantu banokuba namava obukrakra bebukele abazali babo kunye / okanye ootatomkhulu noomakhulu babo besiba mandundu kwizifo, okanye babone imitshato ezinzileyo isiwa, kwaye banomdla wokufumana into efanayo.
Ukuba banokuyiphepha imigibe yabo bakhulele phambi kwabo, emva koko banokuwunqanda umvandedwa kunye nokudana abaye bazibonela ngawabo amehlo.
4. Amampunge
Bangaphi abantu obaziyo abathe phithi kukugcina inkangeleko yabo yobutsha?
Kuyinto ehlala ihleli kuyo yonke inkcubeko kwiplanethi, kwaye enye ishishini lobuhle ligxila kuyo endaweni eyoyikisayo.
Abantu bahlala begcwele umyalezo wokuba ulutsha kunye nobuhle zezona mpawu zabo zokwenyani, nokuba ukuguga yinto ekufanele ilwelwe nayo, hleze bawele kwimibimbi, badumbe, kunye nazo zonke ezinye izinto ezihamba nenkqubo yokuguga yendalo.
Abantu abadala bayahlanjululwa kunokuba bahlonitshwe, kwaye kwinkcubeko apho umtsalane wesini omnye uthathwa ngokuba yiyo yonke into kunye nokuphela kobukho babo, ukuguga kuthetha ukuba abasayi kuphinda banqweneleke. Ziya kuba zingabalulekanga kwaphela.
Abantu abaphantsi abo bachonga ngokupheleleyo ukuzithemba kwabo ngenkangeleko yabo bangaya kwi-ballistic ngokupheleleyo xa beqala ukuqonda ukuba oonokrwece bomzimba wabo wexeshana baqala ukubonisa ukonakala, kwaye uninzi luya kumanyathelo agqithisileyo ukuze lunamathele ulutsha.
andinantando yanto
Unokuthanda (inqaku liyaqhubeka ngezantsi):
- Unokuba kanjani noBudlelwane obuPhumeleleyo neManolescent
- Iindlela ezi-5 Isivamvo selungelo siyazityhila
- Ungalunqoba njani uloyiko loTshintsho kwaye ujonge ngokuzithemba kwimiceli mngeni emitsha
- Ngaba unokuLungisa ubudlelwane obuNye okanye Ngaba kufuneka ubuphelise?
- Indlela yokukhula kwaye ube ngumntu omdala oqolileyo
5. Ingxaki yomntwana engasonjululwanga
Kwimeko enje ngale, kuncinci ukwala ukukhula, kunye nokungakwazi ukwenza njalo.
Kwabanye abantu abafumana umothuko wobuntwana obunzima, bakhululeke ngakumbi ukuhlala kwilizwe lamaphupha elinokwenzeka njengohlobo lokubaleka, kunokuba bephila ngokwenyani… ngakumbi xa kufikwa kumba wokujongana neemeko ezinzima okanye izigqibo ezinzima.
Xa bejamelene nemeko enzima, bayakuzihlukanisa kwaye babuyele kwindawo ekhuselekileyo, ephucukileyo yefantasy, kunokuba bajongane nezinto… kunye nokuzama ukubanyanzela ukuba bathathe amanyathelo kuya kubangela ukuba baphinde baqhubeke.
Ukuba ezi ndlela zokuziphatha azilungiswa xa umntu esemncinci kakhulu, baya kudlulela ebudaleni kwaye babathintele ngokusisigxina, bebagcina ekuthatheni naziphi na izigqibo okanye bathathe nawaphi na amanyathelo kubomi ababufunayo.
Endaweni yokuba bekhululeke ukuziqumbela kwiimeko abazicekisayo, kuba ubuncinci kukho ukhuseleko kwinto eyaziwayo.
Ukuba kufuneka balwe noxinzelelo olunzima kunye / okanye uxinzelelo, ezo ziya kuyandisa imvakalelo yokuba sesichengeni, ngenxa yoko bazifumana bephindaphinda iimeko apho bangabantwana kwaye bengenakuzinceda, bekhathalelwe ngabanye.
Oku kunokuba ngamalungu osapho asondeleyo, okanye amaqabane abanyanzela kwiindima zokhathalelo . Nokuba yeyiphi na indlela, bayakuphepha ukukhula.
6. Babanjisiwe Kwiintsuku Zozuko Zobutsha Babo
Oku kuqhelekile kubantu ababenodumo olufutshane okanye impumelelo kwiminyaka yabo yeshumi elivisayo okanye kumashumi amabini eminyaka, kwaye bagqibe kwelokuba babambelele kolo shimmer lwethutyana ngonaphakade.
Umntu inokuba yindoda eneminyaka engama-60 ubudala enxiba kwaye iziphathe kakuhle njengoko yayineminyaka eyi-22 kwaye yaphumelela ibhendi yayo ye rock.
Okanye umfazi oneminyaka engama-40 engayi kuyeka ukuthetha ngendlela ubomi obumangalisa ngayo xa wayeyimodeli yeshumi elivisayo kwaye wayenomdla wokuzibandakanya nomntu owaziwayo.
Aba bantu banamathele exesheni, njengeziporho ezibanjiswe ngela xesha lokusweleka kwabo, kwaye baya kuhlala bephila ngalo mzuzu ngaphezulu nangonaphakade.
Ezo zihlandlo apho baziva bekhethekile kwaye bethandwa yayingamatye ekona ophuhliso lwabo, kwaye bahlala bebambelele kubo, bengakwazi ukuqhubeka.
7. Ukuphazamiseka kubuntu
Iziphazamiso ezithile zobuntu, ezinje ngeqela B leqela elinje ngomda wobuntu okanye ukuphazamiseka kubuntu, kunokugcina umntu ekukhuleni ebudaleni.
Ukuziphatha kwabo kukhulu kakhulu, ngokweemvakalelo , engalindelekanga, kunye nokuzenzakalisa, ukuba bazokuzifumana bekwimeko ezibenza babandezeleke (oko ke kubanyanzela ukuba babuye umva), okanye baya kuzinyanzela ezo meko ukuze babe ukuzithethelela ukubuyela endaweni efanayo.
Kwimizamo yabo yokuphepha naluphi na uhlobo lwentlungu, ukungakhululeki, okanye ukulahlwa, bakhetha ukuhlala kwiindawo nakwiimeko abanokuzilawula kuzo ikhuselekile .
Kwabaninzi, oku kuthetha indlu kamama notata, okanye indlu abahlala kuyo ukusukela kwiminyaka ye-18, besitya ukutya okufanayo (kuba banika intuthuzelo), benxibe isimbo esifanayo (kuba oko kugcina izinto zingaguquguquki), njl.
Kukho esinye isizathu esiqhelekileyo sokuba kutheni abantu abaninzi benqaba ukukhula, kwaye rhoqo kunoko, yile nto iphantsi ebangela ukuba zonke ezi zizathu zikhankanyiweyo zikhankanywe apha ngasentla:
8. Ukufa Kuyaboyikisa Ngokupheleleyo
Ukukhula kuthetha ukuba ngabantu abadala.
Xa sele bebadala, kufuneka bavume ukuba bayaluphala.
Ukwaluphala kuthetha ukuguga.
Ukukhula okudala kuthetha ukuba baya kufa.
Nangona ukufa kuyinxalenye yomjikelo wobomi bendalo wayo yonke into ephilayo, inkcubeko yokufa ekhanyela ukufa iyabuxabisa ulutsha kunye nobuhle, kwaye inyelisa ukwaluphala.
mdala kangakanani unyana wedrake
Ukufa yinto ekufanele ilwelwe nxamnye nayo, iphikiswe, ingahoywa, kungajongwana nayo kwaphela.
Abantu benza konke okusemandleni abo ukunqanda nokucinga ngokufa, ndingasathethi ke ngako, kwaye ukuqonda ngesiquphe ukuba nabo, baya kufa ngenye imini, kunokuba buhlungu, kude kuyekise umntu.
Kwaye ke bayaziphazamisa ngezinto ezingenamsebenzi, nokuba kukuhlakulela ingqokelela yeencwadi ezihlekisayo, ukugocagoca intlebendwane yosaziwayo, okanye ukutsalela ingqalelo kwimpilo yakutshanje kunye nokutya - nantoni na ukugcina iingqondo zabo zingajongani nenyani yokuba konke oku kuyakuphela ngenye imini.
Endaweni yokwamkela oku ngomlinganiso wobabalo, badlala ngathi ngathi bancinci kwaye abanankathalo, babalekela ngonaphakade inyani yesiphelo sabo, endaweni yokwanga kunye nokubhiyozela ixesha abanalo.
