Iimpawu ze-12 Lixesha lokuba uhambe kude nomtshato emva kokungathembeki

Yeyiphi Imovie Ukubona?
 

Ukungathembeki emtshatweni kukungcatsha ukuthembana, nokuba kukunxibelelana ngokweemvakalelo abakhulayo nomnye umntu, okanye okwasemzimbeni.



Ingaziva ngathi iyatshabalalisa umhlaba ukuba iqabane lakho alithembekanga kuwe, kwaye kwizibini ezininzi, kuninzi ukubuya.

Kodwa akusoloko kuthetha ukuba ukuphela komtshato wakho. Ngomonde kunye nomsebenzi omabini amacala, ezinye izibini zinokufumana indlela yokwakha ukuthembana kunye nonxibelelwano obukade ukho phakathi kwabo.



Kodwa uyazi njani ukuba ukunika ithuba yinto efanelekileyo yokwenza? Ungafuna ukuba ubudlelwane buphile, kodwa ukusebenza kuso sesona sigqibo sihle nesempilweni yeyakho ?

Funda eminye yemizekelo yexa uhamba emtshatweni kunokuba lukhetho olufanelekileyo onokulwenza:

1. Ababonisi kuzisola.

Ukuthi uxolo akusoloko kwanele. Ukuba iqabane lakho alikwazi ukukubonisa ukuba uzisola kangakanani, ungathemba njani ukuba abaxeleli nje le nto ufuna ukuyiva?

Kunzima ukuxelela ukuba umntu uxolile ngokwenyani, ngakumbi xa ukuthembana phakathi kwakho kwaphulwe kwaye ulinde ukuba babeke olunye unyawo olungalunganga.

Eyona ndlela yokuxelela ukuba bayazisola ngokwenyani kukujonga isenzo sabo hayi amazwi abo.

Ngaba bakunika ingqalelo ngakumbi, benza umgudu ngakumbi kulwalamano, kwaye babeka ulonwabo lwakho phezulu kuluhlu lwabo oluphambili?

Ukuba bazama ukuthethelela izenzo zabo zokungathembeki kwaye yijongele phantsi indlela oziva ngayo , zithathe ezi njengeeflegi ezinkulu ezibomvu.

Nokuba zeziphi na izinto ezibakhokelele ekubeni bangathembeki, kufuneka okungenani babe nosizi ngokunyanisekileyo ngokubangela ukuba ube buhlungu.

Ukuba uziva ngathi bathetha uxolo ukuphepha ukujongana nento abayenzileyo, ungathemba ukuba abasayi kuphinda bathembeke?

konke okwenzayo kuyandiphoxa

Ngaphandle kokuba ulubonile utshintsho kwindlela abaziphethe ngayo, uyazi njani ukuba ayizukufaka nje izinto kude kube lixesha elizayo? Kwaye ngaba uyafuna ukunamathela ukuze ufumane?

2. Abakuqondi ukubaluleka kwento abayenzileyo.

Iqabane lakho linokufuna ukujonga into eyenzekileyo kwaye libuyele esiqhelweni, kodwa kuya kufuneka ufumane into entsha eqhelekileyo kunye kuqala.

Ukungcatsha kunye nazo zonke iimvakalelo eziza nako akunakushenxiswa ecaleni kulityalwe.

Nokuba yayingumyalezo ongcolileyo, ukwanga, okanye enye into engakumbi, ukukhetha ukwenza into ngasemva kwakho enokuthi ibe semngciphekweni wolwalamano lwakho yingxaki enkulu.

Bamele bayamkele intlungu abakubangele yona kwaye baqonde ukuba kuya kuthatha ixesha kunye nomzamo wokwakha ukuthembana kwakho kwakhona.

Kufuneka wazi ukuba bayakuqonda ukungabikho kwembeko abaye bakubonisa yona kunye neentlungu abazenzileyo kwaye ungumba ophambili kubo kwakhona.

'Uxolo' olulula alwanele. Ukuba bayakutyhalela ukuba uqhubeke ngokukhawuleza kwaye utshayele izinto phantsi kwekhaphethi, uya kuhlala ucaphukile ngomonakalo abawenzileyo.

3. Bayala ukubonana nengcali.

Akukho mntu uhlala ekulungele ukuphatha ukungathembeki emtshatweni wabo. Yiyo loo nto ukufuna uncedo lobuchwephesha ukuba ufuna ukwenza izinto zisebenze kunokuba yeyona ndlela ilungileyo yokwenza nobabini.

Umcebisi womtshato uqeqeshelwe iimeko ezinje ngezi, ukuqeqesha wena neqabane lakho.

Akukho hlazo ekufikeleleni kumntu onokukunceda uthethe ngeemvakalelo zakho kwaye akukhokelele ubuyele kwinto efanayo.

Kodwa uza kuthini ukuba iqabane lakho liyala ukuhamba nawe? Kungenzeka ukuba baneentloni zokuvuma ukuba umtshato wakho uyasokola, okanye bazive bengakhululekanga ukwabelana ngeenkcukacha zomntu ongamaziyo.

Nokuba yeyiphi na indlela, ukuthandabuza ukufuna isikhokelo sobungcali, ngakumbi ukuba le yinto ofuna ukuyilandela, icebisa ukuba abazimiselanga ngokuhamba loo mile eyongezelelweyo ukugcina oko unayo.

Ukuzama ukunqanda ukujongana nento abayenzileyo kucebisa ukuba abayiqondi ngokupheleleyo imeko yoxinzelelo ababeke ulwalamano lwakho phantsi kwayo, okanye abakhathali.

Bamele bafune ukwenza nantoni na abanokuyenza ukuze umtshato wakho usebenze kwaye babonise ukuba bazimisele ukuhamba umgama nangona kunjalo kungonwabanga kubo.

Ukuba abekho, mhlawumbi abaluxabisi ubudlelwane bakho njengoko ubucinga ukuba benzile.

4. Akukho nto itshintshileyo kulwalamano.

Awunakulindela ukuba yonke into ibuyele kwindlela eyayihlala ngayo ngaphambi kokuba umcimbi uqhubeke. Wena neqabane lakho nifanele nilungele ubudlelwane benu ukuba butshintshe ukuba nithathe isigqibo sokuyinika enye indlela.

Ngaphezu koko, ulwalamano lwakho kufuneka lutshintshe. Kuya kufuneka ubone iqabane lakho lifaka umzamo ongaphezulu wokubuyisa ukuthembana kwakho, uchithe ixesha unxibelelana kwakhona, kwaye nizolile kwakhona kwakhona.

Amathuba kukuba, bekukho iintanda eziqala ukubonisa emtshatweni wakho ngaphambi kokuba iqabane lakho lingathembeki. Imikhwa emibi kunye nokungahoywa kobudlelwane kunokuphelela ekungathembekini, kwaye le micimbi kufuneka iqwalaselwe ukuba ufuna ukuqhubeka.

Akunangqondo ukulindela ukuba yonke into ibe njengokuba yayinjalo ngaphambili, kwaye ukuba iqabane lakho lilindele oku kuwe, kufuneka ubuze ukuba bazimisele kangakanani ekwenzeni izinto zisebenze.

Ukwenza umtshato wenu usebenze emva kokuthandana kuya kuthatha umzamo omkhulu kunye nokuzibophelela okuqinileyo kuni nobabini kunangaphambili. Ukuba imikhwa yabo emibi ayitshintshanga kwaye ubuyela umva ngokufanayo iipateni zobudlelwane obungenampilo , ungayithemba njani imbali ayizukuziphinda?

5. Abakhange basike amaqhina neqabane labo.

Ukubonisa ukuba bazinikele kwi-100% kuwe kufuneka ube yeyona nto iphambili iqabane lakho emva kokungathembeki.

Ukuba ngenene bafuna ulwalamano lwenu lusebenze, ukugxila kwabo kufuneka kugxile kuni nobabini kunye nendlela yokubuyisela ulwalamano ebeninalo.

Ukusika lonke ubudlelwane kunye nabani na obandakanyekayo kwimicimbi yabo linyathelo lokuqala lokufikelela koku.

Nokuba bayasebenza nabo, bayabazi ngabahlobo bakho, okanye banazo kwimithombo yeendaba zentlalo, wena iqabane lakho kufuneka lenze konke okusemandleni abo ukuzikhwebula kubo nakowuphi na umthombo wesilingo.

Ngaphandle kokwazi ukuba banqumle lonke ulwalamano, awusoze ukwazi ukuthembela ngokupheleleyo ukuba abasayi kubuyela kulo mntu ungomnye kwakhona.

Ukwala ukuphelisa lonke unxibelelwano, okanye okubi ngakumbi, ukufumanisa ukuba iqabane lakho lixokile malunga nokusika onke amaqhina, kuya konakalisa naliphi na ithemba lokudlula kulwalamano.

Awusoze ukwazi ukuqhubela phambili usazi ukuba inxalenye encinci yabo ayifuni ngokwenene.

6. Ubudlelwane bujinga kuwe.

Basenokuthi bayakuvumela ukuba uthathe ubudlelwane ngesantya sakho, kodwa oko akufuneki kumise iqabane lakho ekubeni lidlale indima ekulungiseni umtshato wakho.

Akufanelekanga ukuba konke kube phantsi kuwe ukuzama ukuwubuyisela umtshato wakho kwikhosi. Ayizizo zonke iingcebiso abazenzayo eziya kuba zezilungileyo, kodwa kubalulekile kuwe ukuba ubone iqabane lakho lisenza iinzame zokuba ukwazi ukukhulisa ukuthembana kunye nothando kubo kwakhona.

Kuthatha abantu ababini ukwenza ubudlelwane busebenze kwaye ukuba awubaboni bebeka isabelo sabo, uyazi njani ukuba bazimisele njengoko besitsho?

7. Awunakubathemba kwakhona.

Ukuthembana onakho kwiqabane lakho ukukonwabisa, kukuhloniphe, kwaye uluxabise uthando lwakho lwaphulwe ngokupheleleyo emva kokungathembeki kwaye unokuziva ungenako ukubuyela.

Kwezinye izibini, ekuhambeni kwexesha, banokufumana inqanaba lokuthembana kunye nolwalamano kwakhona, kodwa kwabanye, ukungcatshwa kuninzi kakhulu ukuba kungadlula.

Ukuthembana yinxalenye ebalulekileyo yobudlelwane. Akukho namnye kuni onokonwaba ngokwenyani ukuba nibuza omnye nomnye iinjongo okanye nixhumela kwizigqibo ngenxa yokoyika ukuba nizakuphinda nilimaze kwakhona.

Awunakho, kwaye akufuneki, ugcine iithebhu kwiqabane lakho umzuzu ngamnye wosuku. Kodwa awusoze uphinde ukhululeke kwaye uzivumele ukuba wonwabe ukuba awukwazi ukuyeka uloyiko lokuba baya kuphinda bangathembeki.

Nokuba ufuna izinto ezingakanani, ukuba awunathemba, awunakamva.

8. Akukho ukusondelelana ngokwasemzimbeni.

Ukuba nolwalamano olusenyongweni neqabane lakho emva kokuba bengathembekanga konke oko kuyinxalenye yokubuyisela ukuthembana kwakho.

Ukucinga ngokusondelelana neqabane lakho kunokubangela ukuba ucinge malunga nokusondelelana nomnye umntu, ukubuyisela zonke iimvakalelo zentlungu kunye nomsindo ngokungathembeki kwabo nokwenza ukuba kube nzima ukuqhubekeka.

Kungathatha ixesha ukuya kwindawo apho ukhululekile ukuba ubathandane nabo kwakhona, kodwa ukuba ufumanisa ukuba akunakwenzeka ukuba ucinge, umtshato mhlawumbi ngekhe uhlangulwe.

Ukusondelelana ngokwasemzimbeni kuqinisa ubudlelwane phakathi kwakho kunye nenqanaba lakho njengesibini. Ukuba awukwazi ukufumana indlela yokuqhagamshela kwakhona, ayizukuphoswa kuphela yinxalenye ebalulekileyo yobudlelwane obusempilweni, kodwa ninokuphela ningonwabanga, nicaphukile, kwaye nomngcipheko wokungathembeki kwixesha elizayo.

9. Usebenzisa ukungathembeki kwabo njengesixhobo.

Ewe, unelungelo lokuziva unomsindo kwaye wonzakele. Iimvakalelo zakho ziya kuba kuyo yonke indawo xa ufumanisa ukuba iqabane lakho likhohlisile kwaye akukho mathandabuzo kuya kubakho iimpikiswano ezininzi kunye noxinzelelo njengoko uzama ukusebenza ngayo.

Nokuba unomsindo kangakanani nabo, umtshato wakho awunakuze uphile ukuba usebenzisa ukungathembeki kwabo njengesixhobo kubo.

Njengokulingwa njengoko kunokuba kukuzisa ubushushu bempikiswano, ukusebenzisa umcimbi wabo kumlo wokubabangela iintlungu nanini na xa uziva wenzakele kuya kukuqhubela phambili kude.

Kuya kubakho indawo apho uthatha isigqibo sokuyiyeka kwaye uqhubeke. Ukuzisa iimpazamo zabo akuyi kubenzakalisa bona kuphela, kodwa kuya kukwenzakalisa nawe.

Ukuba ufumanisa ukuba awuzimisele ukulahla umxholo, mhlawumbi ngumqondiso wokuba awukwazi phelisa ukuqhathwa . Ezinye iintlungu zinzulu kakhulu kwaye kungcono ukuba nivumele nobabini ukuba niqhubeke kwaye ufumane ukonwaba nomnye umntu.

10. Bayala ukuthatha uxanduva.

Ukuze ukwazi ukuqhubekeka ungathembeki kwiqabane lakho, kufuneka ubone ukuba bayazisola ngokunyanisekileyo, kwaye baya kuthatha uxanduva ngezenzo zabo.

Nokuba ibisisiphelo sezinto ezikhokelele ekubeni bangathembeki, ekugqibeleni ibe lukhetho lwabo, kwaye kuphela ukhetho lwabo lokwenza izinto ngokunyanzelwa kunye nokubeka emngciphekweni ubudlelwane bakho

Ukuba iqabane lakho lihlala ligxeka wonke umntu ngale meko kunokuba bazibeke ngokwabo, kukho ingxaki.

Kubi ngakumbi ukuba baqala ukuzama ukubeka ityala kuwe ngokubangela ukuba bakope. Ayisiyiyo le nto ukuthatha uxanduva ngezenzo zabo, kodwa olu hlobo lokuziphatha luyanyanzelisa kwaye luyingozi kwaye luyiflegi ebomvu ukuba umtshato wakho uguqukile.

Ukugxeka abanye abantu kunokuba bathathe uxanduva ngendima abayidlalileyo kulwalamano kubonisa ukuba iqabane lakho nokuba alikholelwa ngokwenyani ukuba babephosisile okanye ukuba ababuqondi ubukrakra bento abayenzileyo.

Nokuba yeyiphi na indlela, ukuba iqabane lakho alinakuvuma ngezenzo zabo, ngekhe bakwazi ukusebenza kuzo, besenza ukuba kube nzima ukuzithemba ukuba abasayi kuphinda benze njalo.

11. Uzama ukuyenza isebenze ngezizathu ezingalunganga.

Ukuba benikunye kunye ithutyana, umtshato uyeka ukuba malunga nobabini kuphela.

Iintsapho zakho, izihlobo, kunye nemali yonke iyabandakanyeka. Unokuhlala kunye, ube nesilwanyana sasekhaya, okanye nabantwana kunye.

Uqhawulo-mtshato lunokuthetha ukwahlukana okungaphezulu kokunye nje. Umbono wokungavisisani kubomi bomnye nomnye kunokubonakala kunzima ukujongana nawo.

Nokuba yeyiphi na imiqobo ebonakala ngathi isendleleni yakho yokushiya kwaye inokuba nefuthe kangakanani kubantu, ngaphandle kokuba uhlala kuba ufuna ngokwenene ukuyenza isebenze neqabane lakho, ayizukuya.

Ukungonwabi kunye kubudlelwane abuzalisekisi nakubani na kwaye kuya kugqibela ngokuchaphazela kakubi bonke abo bantu ubucinga ukuba uhlala nabo.

Uya kuyeka ukunxulumana kunye neqela elidibeneyo lobuhlobo, iintsapho zakho ziya kwazi ukuba kukho into engalunganga, kwaye abantwana bakho baya kuqala ukukholelwa ukuba olu lwalamano lubi yindlela ubudlelwane ekufuneka bujongeka ngayo.

Nokuba kunzima kangakanani na, ukonwaba kwakho kufanele kuze kuqala. Ukuba iintliziyo zenu zombini azikho kuyo, nizolula nje into engenakuphepheka.

12. Awungekhe uqhubeke phambili.

Usenokuba uyifuna ngokwenene ukuba iphume. Uzamile ukuthetha ngayo, iqabane lakho lenza umzamo, uzame ukucebisa ngomtshato, kodwa kunjalo awukwazi ukuwuyeka.

Asinguye wonke umntu onokubuya ekungathembekini. Ngowona myolelo ubalaseleyo emhlabeni, ngamanye amaxesha oko kungcatshwa kokuthenjwa kukuchaphazela ngokunzulu kakhulu ukuze ube nakho ukudlulela kuyo.

Ukungakwazi ukujonga iqabane lakho ngendlela efanayo, nokuba uzama kangakanani, kuthetha ukuba ubudlelwane buphelile.

Ukuba uziva ngathi uzame yonke into ukuyenza isebenze, ungahamba uhambe usazi ukuba uyinike eyona foto ibalaseleyo. Ayilulo lonke ulwalamano oluneziphelo ezimnandi.

Qaphela ukuba awukwazi ukuyiyeka kwaye uzibeke kuqala. Ngaba nobabini niyathandana kwaye nivumele omnye nomnye ukuba afumane ulonwabo kwenye indawo.

Ukuba omnye wenu akathembekanga, umtshato wakho awuzukuphinda ubuyele esiqhelweni ngobusuku obunye. Kuza kuthatha ixesha, umonde, kunye nomsebenzi omninzi wokubuyisela nobabini kwindawo ezinzileyo nenothando.

Ukukhetha ukuhlala nokuzama ukwenza izinto zisebenze akuthethi ukuba kuya kuhlala kunjalo. Ngamanye amaxesha ukungathembeki kunokuba yinto ebangela ukuba sivume ukuba umtshato wawungafanelanga ukuba ubekho.

Ixesha lingumphilisi, kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo uya kuyidinga ukuze uphinde uchache. Kodwa kuphela nguwe owaziyo, ezantsi ezantsi, ukuba ngokwenene uyakwazi ukwenza ukuba umtshato wakho usebenze kwakhona.

Nyaniseka kwisiqu sakho malunga nento ozama ukuyigcina. Ngaba ngokwenene usafuna ukuba nalo mntu, okanye likratshi nje okanye ukoyika ukuba wedwa okwenza ukuba uhlale?

Nokuba uzibophelele kuzo zonke izizathu ezichanekileyo kwaye ukholelwa ukuba ungazinika enye into izinto, kusengafika inqanaba xa kufuneka ujongane nesigqibo esinzima sokuba ungahlali okanye awuhlali. Ngethuba nje unokuthi uzame, akunakubakho ntloni okanye ukuzisola ekuvumeni ukoyiswa.

Ngaba awuqinisekanga ukuba wenzeni ngomtshato wakho? Ngaba ufuna ukuthetha izinto nomntu? Thetha kwi-Intanethi kwingcali yobudlelwane kwi-Relationship Hero enokukunceda ufumane izinto. Ngokulula.

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