Ke, udibene nomfana nje, kodwa uyazibuza ukuba ulungile na njengoko ucinga, okanye ungumdlali nje.
Kunokuba nzima ngenene ukwazi, ngakumbi xa uninzi lwethu lusenza iinzame ezinkulu zokuba 'zezona zilungileyo kuthi' kwinqanaba lokuqala lokuthandana.
Umdlali ngokuyintloko ngumntu ohlala enobudlelwane bexesha elifutshane, ngaphandle kokwenza omnye umntu azi ukuba baya kuba lixesha elifutshane.
Banokuba namaqabane amaninzi ngaxeshanye, bazenze abangatshatanga ukuze badibane nabanye abantu, okanye baphambanise amaqabane abo ngokujikeleza.
ubudibanisa njani ubomi bakho
Ke, ungazi njani ukuba umntu ungumdlali? Nayi imiqondiso ye-12 yokugcina iso ukuba ucinga ukuba indoda yakho inokuba yenye.
1. Udlala ngothando nomhlobo wakho.
Ukuba ukhe wadibana nomfana ebharini kwaye wachitha ixesha elifanelekileyo edlala ngothando nomhlobo wakho ngokunjalo nawe, kunokwenzeka ukuba abe ngumdlali.
Mhlawumbi ujonge nje ukufumana nabani na, kwaye akanangxaki nokuba ingaba nguwe okanye umhlobo wakho okanye enye intombazana engahleliyo kwikona yebar.
Abadlali bakholisa ukuba ngoosomashishini benento enye engqondweni…
2. Unamehlo ajikelezayo.
Ngaba uhlala ekhangela i-waitress okanye i-bartender? Mhlawumbi uthatha kabini kubafazi esitalatweni?
Ewe, asifumani ngequbuliso wonke umntu ngokungathandekiyo ngokungathandekiyo xa sibona umntu omtsha, kodwa kufanelekile ukuba siqwalasele ukuba kutheni nangoku ekhangela abanye abafazi ngokufihlakeleyo xa ethandana nawe.
Ukuba ucinga ukuba angangumdlali kwaye uhlala umbamba ejonge kwabanye abantu basetyhini, unokufumana impendulo yakho.
3. Uziva ungonelisekanga xa ujikeleze amanye amabhinqa.
Umntu othandana naye kufuneka akwenze uzive unomtsalane, wonwabe, unomdla - zonke izinto ezilungileyo.
Ukuba ufumanisa ukuba uziva unganqabisekanga xa ukunye nabanye abafazi, kusenokwenzeka ngenxa yendlela aziphatha ngayo.
Ukuba uziva ngathi ubanike ingqwalaselo enkulu, okanye ukubeka phantsi phambi kwabo ‘njengesiqhulo’ okanye ukubukisa, uyakumosha.
4. I exes zakhe zonke 'zengqondo.'
Le yeyona nto inomsindo ukuva njengowasetyhini!
Kusenokwenzeka ukuba abantu abebedlulile kuye bebengengabo ‘abahlutshwa yingqondo.’ Basenokungavani kakuhle, okanye babesebenzisa gadalala okanye belawula…
… Kodwa ukuba bekunjalo konke 'Uphambene' ngokutsho kwakhe, kufanelekile ukuqaphela ukuba ingaba le nto yayiyinto ebikukungqinelana nabo bonke ubudlelwane bakhe, okanye ingaba yingxelo yakhe le.
Abanye abadlali bakhetha ukugxotha amaqabane abo njengolu hlobo kuba kulula kunokwamkela into eyenzekileyo, okanye kuba ibasusa emngxunyeni kwaye ibanika isizathu esihle sokugcina izinto zingaqhelekanga.
5. Ube neeflings ezininzi.
Ukuba ebenayo okuninzi kubudlelwane bexesha elifutshane, kuya kufuneka uyibone le nto iyiyo-umkhwa kunye nokukhetha.
Ngelixa kulungile ukwenza oku ukuba nje wonke umntu ukhuselekile kwaye wonwabile ngayo, kungangumqondiso wokuba uyakwenza okufanayo nakuwe.
Ukuba ukhululekile kuloo nto, yiya kuyo. Ukuba akunjalo, cinga malunga nokuba uyonwabile okanye awonwabanga ukubona ukuba lo mkhwa uphuma njani- kuba isenokungahambi ngendlela ofuna ngayo…
6. Yena zonke apps ukuthandana.
Ewe kulungile ukuba nabani na abe kwiinkqubo ezininzi zokuthandana, kodwa kunokuba ngumqondiso wokuba ungumdlali.
Ukuba uhlala ehlangana nabantu abahlukeneyo kwi-hookups eziqhelekileyo okanye i-flings, unokungakhange akhangele nantoni na enzulu. Kuya kufuneka ucinge ngendlela ekwenza uzive ngayo ukuba are ujonge into enzulu.
Ukuba usaqhubeka nokuthandana kwii -apps kodwa ucinga ukuba niyabonana kuphela, kufuneka nincokole malunga noku.
Ukuba nobabini nibona ngokuphandle abanye abantu, mkhulu, akukho drama-qiniseka nje ukuba unyanisekile kwisiqu sakho malunga nendlela esivakalelwa ngayo.
7. Unodumo ngayo.
Ngokuqinisekileyo, abanye abantu bafumana igama elingalunganga, kodwa ukuba abantu abaninzi bakuxelele ukuba ungumdlali kwaye baya kukuphazamisa-ubamamele!
Kunganzima ngelo xesha, xa uziva ngathi izinto ziyonwabisa kwaye ukhe wanemihla embalwa, kodwa kufanelekile ukuhoya oko kuthethwa ngabanye abantu.
imiqondiso yokufuna ingqalelo kwi-facebook
Awudingi ukuthatha ilizwi labo njengeendaba ezilungileyo, kodwa kulungile ukuba ugcine engqondweni yakho xa kunokwenzeka aqale ukubonisa ezinye iimpawu zokuba ngumdlali.
Mhlawumbi yinto ehlekisayo, mhlawumbi abahlobo bakhe bamane bemfaka umoya malunga nokuziphatha okudlulileyo, kodwa inokuba ngumqondiso ocacileyo wokuba izinto zisenokungahambi njengoko ulindele kwezi veki zimbalwa zizayo.
8. Uziva ngathi kufuneka umjongile.
Ukuba uqalile ukuthandana nomntu kwaye ukhathazekile kancinci ukuba uyakuxokisa okanye uyakumosha, mhlawumbi uziva ngathi awunakumthemba xa uphumile.
Mhlawumbi umvile exelela abantu ukuba akatshatanga okanye akayonto naye ngokuchukumisayo.
Ukuba uziva ngathi kufuneka ubeke esweni indlela aziphethe ngayo, kungenzeka ukuba ukhona umba ngayo, kwaye ayisiyompilo kuni ...
9. Akenzi nzame.
Ukuba uqalile ukuthandana nomntu kwaye abenzi nyani nawe, banokuba bayayidlala intsimi.
Banokukuthanda, kodwa banokuthanda izinto xa zilula. Abadlali abaninzi bajikeleza de kube izinto ziyadika okanye de bacelwe ukuba benze umgudu ongakumbi.
Ukuba uziva ngathi akazikhathazi ngezinto, ngekhe abe.
Ewe kunjalo, akukho ngqiqweni ukulindela iqabane okanye amandla iqabane ukuba ubhalele umva ngoko nangoko ngalo lonke ixesha naku soze ulibale ukuthumela umyalezo ebusuku okanye ukufowunele xa besitsho.
Kodwa, ukuba isiba ngumkhwa kwaye azikwenzi uzive ngathi bakhathalele ngokwenene, kuya kufuneka ucinge ukuba kutheni kunokuba njalo.
Mhlawumbi watsho kwasekuqaleni ukuba akafuni nto imbi? Mhlawumbi uyakudlala kwaye akubopha ngentambo ukuze alunge?
Ukuba iyakukhathaza kwaye kufuneka uyazi ukuba umi phi, kufuneka uthethe naye ngayo.
10. Uyaxoka ngezinto ezincinci.
Ngokuqinisekileyo, sonke sixelele ubuxoki obumhlophe obambalwa ngexesha lethu, kodwa ukuba umntu uhlala exoka, nkqu malunga nezinto ezincinci , kukho ithuba lokuba bangabantu abaxokayo ngezinto ezinkulu nazo.
Ukuba wenza izizathu ezingahleliwe, ephindaphinda etshintsha iinkcukacha zebali elinye, okanye ebonakala enomthunzi, usenokudlala ngandlela thile.
Asikukhuthazi ukuba uqale ubatyhole ngokukopela okanye ukungcatsha ukuthembela kwakho kwixesha elizayo xa exoka malunga nokuba ivenkile iphume ebisini, kodwa unokufuna ukuqaphela ukuzisa olu hlobo lokuziphatha kunye naye.
Zama ukungaziboni ugxeka, njengoko kunokubakho isizathu esivakalayo sobuxoki, kodwa mxelele akwenze uzive ngathi awunakumthemba kwaye ufuna nje ukuba azive ekhululekile ukunyaniseka nawe… nokuba yena ucinga ingakukhathaza.
Mnike ithuba lokuba avele kwaye axolise ngokuziphatha kwakhe. Ukuba akayithathi kwaye uqhubeka ekuxokisa, uyazi ukuba kufuneka wenze ntoni.
11. Ngokwenene, ngokucacileyo.
Ukuba akaze anike zinkcukacha malunga nantoni na (into ebeye kuyo, lowo axhonywe kunye naye, apho ebephethe khona phezolo, njl. Njl.), Unokukufihlela into.
Yindlela yokuziphatha komdlali-abayikuxeleli ngokungqalileyo izinto ukuze bangabinako ukuphendula ngayo nantoni na kamva emgceni.
Ewe kunjalo, abanye abantu bayinto engacacanga kwiinkcukacha ngamanye amaxesha. Mhlawumbi akafuni ukukukruqula, mhlawumbi akacingi ukuba umkhathalele ngokwenene, okanye mhlawumbi unovalo lokuvuma ukuba uphaphe ngokufihlakeleyo kwiWorld Warcraft!
Akukho ndlela yokuziphatha incinci, xa uwedwa, kuthetha ukuba umntu ungumdlali ngephanyazo- kodwa ukuba kukho ezinye iimpawu apho kwaye amathumbu akho akuxelela ukuba uza kukuphazamisa, naka ingqalelo.
12. Uqhayisa ngabafazi.
Mhlawumbi umvile encokola ngokulala nawe kubahlobo bakhe, okanye amaqabane akhe onke abelana ngamabali amantombazana abekhe aba nawo.
Ukuba ubonakala ngathi luhlobo lomntu oqhayisayo ngabafazi, mhlawumbi uswele uhlobo lwentlonipho oyikhangelayo kwaye kunokwenzeka ukuba abe ngumdlali.
Ngokuqinisekileyo, sonke sithetha ngabantu esakhe sathandana okanye salala nabo - kodwa ukuba kuvakala ngathi uyazenza ezi zinto ukuze axelele abahlobo bakhe ngazo, mhlawumbi uyakubona njengoloyiso, hayi iqabane elinokubakho.
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Ke, ukuba ucinga ukuba lo mfo ungumdlali, wenzelwe ntoni malunga nayo?
Lixesha lencoko ethembekileyo. Ewe, zinokuba nzima ngokwenene, kodwa iingxoxo ezivulekileyo zibalulekile ekwenzeni into isebenze.
Ukuba wonwabile nobabini ngokubona abanye abantu, mhlawumbi mxelele oku - kungayicoca umoya, izakumnqanda enze ngokungathandabuzekiyo, kwaye nobabini niyazi ukuba nimi phi.
Ukuba nobabini niyavuma ukunyaniseka malunga nokubona abanye abantu, ngekhe afune ukuba azimele efowunini yakhe kwaye nobabini niyakonwabela ixesha lenu kunye, nisazi ukuba yonke into isekuhleni kwaye nobabini indawo enye.
Ukuba ucinga ukuba izinto zinokusebenza phakathi kwakho, kodwa kukho iiflegi ezimbalwa ezibomvu ezikwenza uzive ungaqhelekanga, thetha.
Mxelele ukuba ufuna ukuba yedwa, okanye ukuba ufuna ukuyenza ibe semthethweni- nokuba yintoni ogqibe ekubeni ufuna ukuyenza naye, uthembeke ngayo.
Akuthethi ukuba kufuneka umcele ukuba aphakamise kwiinyanga ezi-3 ezizayo, kodwa kubonisa ukuba uyakhathala kwaye ucinga ukuba kufanelekile ukutyala ixesha kunye nemizamo yakho.
Uyakonwaba nokuba yedwa kwaye ayeke ukubona abanye abantu ukuba ebesele enjalo, okanye uya kuyenza icace ukuba ufuna into engaqhelekanga.
Nokuba yeyiphi indlela, uya kwazi ukuba umi phi. Isenokungabi kanye apho ufuna khona, kodwa, njengoko sonke sisazi, zininzi iintlanzi elwandle- kwaye uyakufumana ekuphatha ngendlela ekufanele ukuba uphathwe ngayo.
Ngaba awuqinisekanga ukuba lo mfo ungumdlali, okanye kufuneka wenze ntoni ngayo? Thetha kwi-Intanethi kwingcali yobudlelwane kwi-Relationship Hero enokukunceda ufumane izinto. Ngokulula.
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