Ex ushiye umyalezo nje?
Inokuba iyabhidisa xa abafana bebuya eblue, kwiinyanga emva kokuba izinto ziphelile.
Masizame ukumisela indlela aziphethe ngayo kwaye siqonde ukuba kuqhubeka ntoni. Nazi izizathu ezili-12 zokuba kutheni ebuyile emva kweenyanga behlukene…
1. Uyakukhumbula.
Sonke siba nostalgic amaxesha ngamaxesha. Mhlawumbi wabona into emkhumbuza wena, okanye ebecinga nje ngezinto ezisandula ukwenzeka.
Nokuba yeyiphi indlela, uyakukhumbula ngokunyanisekileyo kunye nento obenayo kunye. Usenokukhumbula ukuba kulwalamano, okanye angaphoswa ukuba ngubani xa wayekunye nawe.
Ufuna ubuye kuba uyakukhumbula ukuba zazinjani izinto ngaphambili.
Ukuba ucinga ukuba ukuzama kwakhona kunokusebenza, yenze! Mamela amathumbu akho, qiniseka ukuba nobabini ninethuba elaneleyo lokuqinisekisa ukuba niyinyani, ngokwenene ufuna ukubuyela kunye, kwaye ujonge ukuba ubusebenze kuyo nayiphi na into ebikubambezela okokugqibela.
Ngokulinganayo, uvunyelwe ukuba uphose umntu kodwa ungafuni ulwalamano lubuye- kwaye kulungile ukumxelela oku.
Unokuthatha isigqibo sokuba awufuni ukuthetha naye kuba kunzima kakhulu, kwaye ufuna nje ukugxila ekudluliseni kuye nasekuqhubekeni phambili, nokuba ungaphoswa kangakanani na.
Ayinguye wonke umntu esimthandayo osilungeleyo, kwaye kufuneka uzibeke kwindawo yokuqala.
2. Uziva enetyala ngendlela akuphathe ngayo.
Ukuba i-ex yakho ibuyile emva kweenyanga, usenokungazami ukukubuyisa, kodwa, endaweni yoko, uxolise kwaye uthathe uxanduva ngokuziphatha kwakhe.
Ukuba nexesha elahlukileyo kunokuba kumnike indawo ayidingayo ukuze acinge ngezenzo zakhe kwaye acinge ngenene ngendima ayidlalileyo kubudlelwane kunye nokwahlukana.
Angaziva eyothuswa yindlela akuphathe ngayo, okanye aphele kwaye kutheni izinto ziphelile, kwaye ufuna ukulungisa izinto ngokucela uxolo.
Kuxhomekeke kuwe ukuthatha isigqibo malunga nendlela oku kuhamba ngayo - ukuba ufuna ukuthetha ngezinto kodwa awukakhululeki yile nto okwangoku, mcele ukuba ahloniphe iminqweno yakho kwaye akunike ixesha elininzi.
Mhlawumbi unokukuthumelela uxolo nge-imeyile kwaye ungayifunda ngexesha lakho.
Okanye, unokukhetha ukuyivala incoko ngokupheleleyo kuba awukhathali nokuba uziva kakubi kangakanani, okanye awufuni kuphinda uyive into eyenzekileyo. Olu lukhetho lwakho!
3. Izicwangciso zakhe zokudlala intsimi aziphumelelanga.
I-ex yakho inokuba ibuphelisile ubudlelwane kuba ifuna ukungatshati okwethutyana.
Oku kuhlala kusenzeka, kwaye kunokuba zizizathu ezininzi: akazange atshate nyani, ubomi bakhe batshintsha (umsebenzi omtsha, abahlobo abatsha, njl. Njl.) Kwaye wayefuna ukuphonononga ezinye iindlela, okanye wayengaqinisekanga ukuba ukulungele ukuzibophelela.
Ewe kunjalo, inokuba leliphi na ezinye izizathu, kwaye kusenokwenzeka ungazi!
Kutheni kugxothwe icass enkulu?
Ukuba wayefuna ukudlala intsimi, mhlawumbi wayefuna ukuhlangana namantombazana amaninzi kwaye 'enze okungcono' ukungatshati. Ewe, kubuhlungu ukucinga ngako, kodwa kunokwenzeka ukuba ibeyinyani yemeko.
Isizathu sokuba abuye erhubuluza ngasemva kukuba uye waqaphela (ukothuka, uloyiko!) Ukuba ukungatshatanga kunye nokulala apha ayisiyiyo yonke loo nto.
Kungonwaba, ngokuqinisekileyo, kodwa kwahluke kakhulu ekubeni kwi ubudlelwane obuzinikeleyo nomntu omkhathaleleyo.
Kusenokwenzeka ukuba waqonda ukuba ukungatshati akumnandi njengokuba wayecinga ukuba kuzakuba njalo, kwaye ngoku angaphinda afune ulwalamano - nawe.
Cinga malunga nokuba uyafuna ukumbuyisela umva, okanye akunjalo. Ngaba ulungile ngokwazi ukuba walala, kwaye ucinga ukuba ungayenza isebenze ngeli xesha?
Uya kudinga ukubonisa intlonipho kwaye ayenze icace into yokuba ungoyena uphambili kuye, hayi ukhetho lwasemva kuba wayekruqukile kukulala apha!
4. Ufuna into angenakuba nayo.
Wenze intshukumo yokuqhekeka kwamandla yeklasikhi- uye wamdlula, wagxila kuwe, kwaye uye wadlula ekukhanyeni ngokweemvakalelo nangokomzimba.
Mhlawumbi ukwimo entle yobomi bakho, okanye ekugqibeleni ubenesibindi sokufaka isicelo salo msebenzi.
Nokuba yintoni na, uye waqaphela. Uyabona ukuba uyakonwabela ukuzimela, ukuba wonwabile kwaye usempilweni kwaye uyachuma - ngaphandle kwakhe…
Okokuqala, i-ego yakhe inokonakala kancinane kule. Uyazibuza ukuba uphumelele njani sisinde ngaphandle kwakhe (kakhulu, siyazi, kodwa oku kuyinyani koko abanye abantu bakucingayo), kwaye unokuzibuza ukuba ubambe ngandlela thile na.
Oko kusenokwenzeka ukuba akuziva kamnandi, ke unokufuna ukubonisa ukuba kwakungekho nto yakwenza naye ngokubuyela kunye nawe. Ukuba ungaqhubeka uphule iinjongo zakho ngelixa uhlala naye kwakhona, ngekhe abe yingxaki ngaphambili, akunjalo?
Okwesibini, akukho nto inomtsalane kunangaphambili owayefuduka kwaye engasakufuni kwakhona. Akunampilo, ngokuqinisekileyo, kodwa kuyinyani.
Ngoku akanakuba nawe, kwaye uqhuba kakuhle, ufuna ubuye. Unomdla ngale nguqulelo intsha, ezimeleyo, nokuzithemba kwaye ufuna ukuba nawe.
Ukwazi ukuba akanakuba nawe (nokuba kungenxa yokuba wena ukumlahla, okanye ngenxa yokuba uye waqhubela phambili) kuya kumqhuba, kwaye kuya kuphembelela umnqweno wakhe kuwe ngakumbi.
Ukuba ukule nqanaba lokuqhubela phambili, unokungafuni nto yakwenza naye! Ujolise ekuzifumaneni ngokwakho ukuza kuthi ga ngoku, ke ngaba ufuna ukubeka emngciphekweni ukubuyela kunye kwaye uphulukane nayo yonke inkqubela phambili oyenzileyo ngelixa ubusebenzela ukuzakha?
Nguwe kuphela onokumphendula lowo…
5. Olunye ukhetho lwakhe aluzange lusebenze.
Masithi ubudlelwane bakho buphelile kuba ufumanise ukuba uyakuqhatha. Uhambe ngeendlela zakho ezahlukileyo, wemka kunye nenkosikazi - kwaye ngoku ubonakalisile kwakhona emva kweenyanga.
Ayithathi ubuhlakani kwikamva lokuba izinto azisebenzi ngakwicala lakhe ...
Ukuba uye wavela kwakhona ebomini bakho kwaye ugcwele izincomo, kunokwenzeka ukuba izinto zaya emazantsi nentombazana awayekuqhatha nayo.
Ufuna ubuye kuba enye indlela ayikhe iphume ngokungathi wayenethemba lokuba iya kuba njalo.
Kwakhona, kufuneka usebenze ukuba wonwabile ukuba lukhetho endaweni yokubekwa phambili . Sele ekhethe omnye umntu endaweni yakho, ke ngaba ukhululekile ukubuyela kunye usazi ukuba ukushiyile ngenxa yenye intombazana?
Ngaba ngokwenene ufuna ukuba ubuye, okanye ngaba ufuna nje umnatha wokhuseleko kuba umqobo wakhe wonakaliswe ngomnye umntu?
6. Unobudlelwane obubi kwaye uyakuqonda oko waphulukana nako.
Le iyafana nale ingasentla, kodwa yahlukile kancinci, kufanelekile ukuba uyiqwalasele. Isenokungakushiyi ngenxa yomnye umntu, ngakumbi, kodwa yaphela kolunye ubudlelwane kungekudala emva kokuba nahlukene.
Inokuba uyayiqonda indlela awayenolwalamano oluhle ngayo nawe, kuba olu lwalamano lwalubi kakhulu. Ngoku ukuba unenye into anokuyisebenzisa ukuthelekisa, angayiqonda indlela awayenethamsanqa ngayo nawe!
Usenokufika kwesi sigqibo ngaphandle kokuthandana nomnye umntu. Kusenokwenzeka ukuba uqonde nje ukuba wonwabele ukuba kunye nawe kwaye nokuba ubudlelwane bukhulu kangakanani na.
Ngamanye amaxesha ukwahlukana kunokunika umbono ofunekayo kunye nokucaca. Inokuba unxibelelana ngoku ukwazisa ukuba ukuxabise kangakanani, kwaye uzisola kangakanani ngokuba engazange ayiqonde loo nto ngaphambili.
Oko kunokusebenzela wena, kwaye ungakuvuyela kakhulu ukuva ezo zinto. Nangona kunjalo, kuya kufuneka akubonise ngokungaguquguqukiyo ukuba uyakuxabisa, kwaye aphile ngezo zithethe ukuba olu lwalamano luzakusebenza. Akakwazi ukubuyela kubomi obulula aze akuthathe kwakhona!
7. Abahlobo bakhe okanye usapho bamxelele.
Siye sonke apho. Ubudlelwane buphela, nangasiphi na isizathu, kwaye, emva kweenyanga ezimbalwa zokugubungela, abantu obathandayo benza amagqabantshintshi malunga nendlela onokuzama ngayo kwakhona
Mhlawumbi batyisiwe kukuba ujongeke ulusizi okanye bakholelwa ngokwenyani ukuba kuya kufuneka uyinike enye into. Nokuba yeyiphi indlela, oku kunokuba yinto eyenzekileyo ukuba i-ex yakho ibuyile emva kweenyanga.
Kusenokwenzeka ukuba uxelelwe ngabahlobo bakhe abambalwa ukuba ungoyena mntu ubalaseleyo kuye owakha wenzeka kuye. Mhlawumbi usapho lwakhe luye lwathi makazame ukuhlala nawe kuba ubumlungele kwaye ebonwabe kakhulu kunaye ngaphandle kwakho.
Ngokuqinisekileyo le yinto ekufuneka uyiqwalasele ukuba ukuphuma kwakho ngokungacwangciswanga kuyavela emva kweenyanga zokunxibelelana!
8. Uziva elilolo okanye ufuna ukuzinyusa.
Sonke siba nesithukuthezi ngamanye amaxesha, kwaye uninzi lwethu 'lubuyela umva' ukufikelela kwizikhundla zethu.
Kungobusuku bangoLwesihlanu, besikhe saya kwiidrinki ezimbalwa, kwaye ngoku sigodukile. Sihamba ngokunxila sityhutyha iifoto zethu zakudala kunye ne-ex yethu apho sasibonakala sonwabile, okanye mhlawumbi izihlobo zethu zigcwele omnye komnye kwaye sinomona ngobudlelwane babo obathandayo.
Nokuba yeyiphi indlela, siziva sinesizungu- kutheni ungathumeli umyalezo kwi-ex yethu kwaye ulinganise nje i-vibe?
Usenokuba uziva inkunkuma ngaye - mhlawumbi akakatshati kwaye kumenza azive engathandeki. Usenokuba nethemba lokuba uza kumncoma uze umenze azive engcono ngaye, njengokuba mhlawumbi nenza xa benikunye.
Usenokufuna wena ukumfuna - ukuba uyakuthumela imiyalezo kwaye uyakuvuyela ukuva kuye kwaye unqwenela ukubuyela kunye, uya kuziva ezifunwa kwaye enqwenelekayo kwaye enomtsalane.
Ukuba kunjalo, akanakho ukuba angabinomdla kwinto enzulu okanye yexesha elide, ke lumkiswa!
Usenokuba nesithukuthezi kwaye azisole kancinci, kwaye unethemba lokuba uya kumnika uthando kunye nengqwalaselo ayifunayo.
9. Uchithe ixesha esebenza ngokwakhe.
Eli lelinye lamaxesha ambalwa esicinga ukuba ukuphuma ngokungakhethiyo kwiinyanga kamva kunokuba yinto elungileyo!
Ukuba uthathe ngokunyanisekileyo iinyanga ezimbalwa ukuba azisebenzele, sinentlonipho enkulu kumfana owenza oku.
Usenokuthatha ixesha ahlukane nokugxila kuye, acinge ngokuziphatha kwakhe kubudlelwane, kwaye aqhubeke nokwenza ukhetho olusempilweni.
Ukuba esinye sezizathu zokuba wahlukane kungenxa yezenzo zakhe okanye indlela aphila ngayo, usenokuba unxibelelana naye ngoku akwazise ukuba ufuna ukuzama kwakhona kwaye ubeke umsebenzi ofunekayo.
Umzekelo, mhlawumbi uye waqhekeka ngenxa yokuba waqala ukusebenzisa iziyobisi kwaye uhlala ngaphandle kwexesha ngalo lonke ixesha. Ukuba uyekile le ndlela aziphethe ngayo, ufuna uyazi kuba kungathetha ukuba uza kumbuyisela.
Mhlawumbi ufumene umsebenzi omtsha, uyekile imikhwa emibi, okanye ukulungele ukuzibophelela kuwe. Ufuna ukuba wazi ukuba uthathe la manyathelo wokuba liqabane elingcono kuwe, kuba ufuna ukuba umnike elinye ithuba.
Vavanya indlela enifanelana ngayo nobabini ngoku, kunye nokuba nicinga ukuba angazibophelela kangakanani kule ndlela intsha yokuphila.
Ukuba wayeka ukutshaya kwiintsuku ezintathu ezidlulileyo, sukumthemba ngokukhawuleza! Usenokungakulungeli ukuzincama ixesha elide ukuze izinto zisebenze.
10. Ufuna nje ukudibanisa.
Ngamanye amaxesha, kufuneka samkele ukuba ii-exes zethu ziyavela nje kuba befuna ukulala ngesondo.
Akukho mfuneko yokuba singene kwiinkcukacha ezininzi apha, njengoko sonke sikhe sakubona oku ngaxa lithile!
Ukuba ukuthumelela imiyalezo okokuqala ngeenyanga kwaye ngo-2 ekuseni, okanye unxilile, okanye imiyalezo iyabonisa okanye iyathandana, kukho ithuba elihle kakhulu lokuba ufuna nje ukulala nawe kwakhona.
Ukuba ulungile ngokulala naye, yiya khona. Ukuba awuqinisekanga, mhlawumbi izakuba nguhayi.
Yazi ukuxabiseka kwakho kwaye ungahlali ngesondo ne-ex xa unokukhetha usuku nomfana onomdla wokwenene kuwe!
11. Udidekile ngokwahlukana.
Ukuba ukwahlukana kwakho ngequbuliso okanye ngokungathandekiyo, kukho ithuba lokuba nobabini nidinga ixesha lokulungisa.
Kunokwenzeka ukuba, ngeli xesha, uye waqonda ukuba akazange afumane ukuvalwa malunga nokuba kutheni ubudlelwane buphelile.
Usenokubuya emva kweenyanga kuba efuna ukucaciselwa. Usenokufuna nje ukuthetha nawe malunga nento eyenzekileyo kunye nokuba kutheni, ukuze akwazi ukuyibeka yonke ebhedini kwaye aqhubeke.
Le yindlela yokuvuthwa kakhulu, kwaye yindlela esempilweni yokulungisa, ukuba uziva ukhululekile kolu hlobo lwencoko.
12. Akaqinisekanga ukuba ufuna ntoni.
Umntu wakho wangaphambili kungenzeka ukuba unxibelelana nawe emva kweenyanga zokuqhekeka ngenxa yokuba engaqinisekanga ukuba uziva njani.
Akafuni ukubuyela kunye, kodwa akayithandi loo nto hayi kunye, nokuba.
Ukuba uziva edidekile malunga nokwenzekileyo phakathi kwenu nobabini, kwaye akayazi into ayifunayo, angathatha ithuba kwaye alinganise i-vibe ukuze abone ukuba usabela njani.
Ukuba uyavuya ukuva kuye, unelinye ithuba kwizinto kunye nawe kwaye unokuqonda ukuba yile nto wayeyifuna ngokwenene.
Ngokulinganayo, ukuba uyamvala kwaye uyenze icace into yokuba anisayi kubuya nibuyelane, kuyakumnceda ukuba amkele ukuba leyo ayisiyiyo nenketho yokucinga kwakhona kwaye uyakuyifumana into ayifunayo ngaloo ndlela.
Ngaba awuqinisekanga ukuba kutheni i-ex yakho ibuyile okanye wenzeni ngayo? Thetha kwi-Intanethi kwingcali yobudlelwane kwi-Relationship Hero enokukunceda ufumane izinto. Ngokulula.
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