Ukuba ukhe wazibonela ngokwakho i-narcissist okanye i-sociopath, uya kushiyeka uzibuza ukuba bangabaphatha njani abanye abantu ngokungakhathali kangako.
Ukuziphatha kwabo kwabanye kuhlala kubanda kakhulu kwaye kungabinantliziyo kangangokuba kubonakala kungakholeleki, kodwa bayakwazi ukwenza ngale ndlela ngenxa yesixhobo sezixhobo ezithile zengqondo.
Mhlawumbi ikho ikakhulu kwinqanaba lokungazi, kodwa le ndlela iyabavumela ukuba benze izenzo zobubi-ezinqamleze ububi-ngaphandle kwezithintelo zeemvakalelo okanye iziphumo ezinokubakho engqondweni esempilweni.
Obu buchule ukuphelisa ubuntu kwaye iyavakala kanye loo nto. I-narcissist okanye i-sociopath iyakususa ngengqondo yonke into malunga nomntu onokuthi athathwe njengophawu lomntu. Ezingqondweni zabo, baya kuzama ukubasusa ekubeni baphile, abantu abaphefumlayo babe zizinto ezingaqondakaliyo abanokuzisebenzisa kwaye bazisebenzise njengokwenza nantoni na eyenye kwindalo yabo.
Le nkqubo ayisiyiyo kuphela into eyenzeka entlokweni yabo, nangona kunjalo kukho iindlela zokwenyani zokufezekisa le njongo, kwaye ezi zinokumonakalisa ngokumangalisayo omnye umntu. Ziquka:
Iinjongo
I-Narcissists kunye ne-sociopaths azinakho ukuphatha ubudlelwane bokwenyani, obusuka entliziyweni phakathi kwabo kunye nabanye abantu abanako ukunxibelelana ngayo nantoni na ngaphandle kwamanqanaba aphezulu.
Andikuthandi ukuthandana kwam neentombi zam
Ke, kunokuba bazame, batshintsha nje umbono wabo ngabo babangqongileyo. Bayazityeshela ngabom iingcinga, iimvakalelo, amalungelo kunye neenkolelo zabanye abantu kwaye bazinciphisele kwizinto nje. Ngale ndlela, ababoni mntu, kodwa ifomu yomzimba engena emzimbeni.
Benza oku kuba beqhelene nezinto abazaziyo indlela yokujongana nazo kwaye bazisebenzise ukuzizuzisa ngokwabo okanye ukoneliseka. Ukujonga abantu njengezinto kubavumela ukuba babaphathe ngendlela efanayo nefowuni, imoto, itafile, okanye ibhedi, umzekelo.
Injongo sesona sithuthi siphambili abakwaziyo ukuzithethelela ngaso kunye nokwenza izinto zabo ezingakhathaliyo nezihlala zibaxhaphaza abanye. Abakwazi ukuziva benovelwano malunga nexhoba kuba, kubo, oku kuya kufana nokuvelana nelitye.
Isiphumo yindawo yokugcina izixhobo, ezomlomo, kunye nezixhobo zomzimba ezibonelela ngeendlela zokukhupha usetyenziso olufunwayo kwezo zijolise kuzo. Kwaye kuba bebona abantu ngendlela efanayo nezinto, abanasikhalazo malunga nokubalahla ukuba bayifezekisile injongo yabo.
Kungenxa yoko le nto, ukuba ungaze ubaleke kubudlelwane bobuchwephesha balo naluphi na uhlobo, kwaye ukwazi ukuhlala uqinile kwaye ugcine unxibelelwano olungelulo, baya kuhamba ngokukhawuleza bafumane ixhoba elitsha ngaphandle kokuthandabuza okomzuzwana. Kubo, yinto engaphaya kokutshintsha kwengubo okanye ukuthenga umabonwakude omtsha. Oku akuthethi ukuba abayi kuzama ukukubandakanya kwakhona ngomhla othile, kodwa abayi kukwenza oko kunxibelelwano oluthile lweemvakalelo baya kufuna ukukusebenzisa kwakhona.
Ukungasebenzi
Ukungasebenzi komnye umntu kukumenza azive enqabile, engalunganga, engaqhelekanga, kwaye awunantsingiselo . Ngokwenza njalo, i-narcissist okanye i-sociopath inokuziqinisekisa ngokugqwesa kwabo ngelixa kwangaxeshanye ithoba isidima somntu kwaye yaphula umoya wabo.
Ukungasebenzi kuza ngeendlela ezininzi. Isenokuba yimeko yokuhlekisa ngomntu ngenxa yeenkolelo zakhe, inkangeleko yakhe, iimvakalelo zakhe, okanye indlela aziphethe ngayo ukuze abenze bazithandabuze. Oku kunokususa ukuzithemba komnye umntu de kube lula ngakumbi ukuba baphathwe kakubi.
Ukulahlwa okuphindiweyo kunokuba nefuthe elifanayo ekuzithembeni komntu. Ukuba umenzi wobubi uyala inkqubela yomntu kaninzi, kunciphisa ukuzithemba kwakhe kwaye kuyamqinisekisa ukuba ayinguye obiza izithonga kubudlelwane. Ngokuthe ngcembe baye bathotyelwa ngakumbi, bajija ngentando yomcinezeli wabo.
Ukungahoyi umntu kukwayindlela enamandla kakhulu yokuphathwa gadalala kwengqondo. Nokuba yiminqweno yeqabane, ukukhala komntwana ngoncedo, okanye ukubulisa kwasekuseni kogxa wakhe, ukuthula kunye / okanye ukungabikho kokuvuma kunokuba yinto ephazamisayo. Ibonisa ukungcungcutheka okuhlala kubonwa kwindlela abaziphethe ngayo kunye nabahlali.
Ukungaze kuphele ukugwetywa kwezenzo kunye neengcinga zikabani yenye indlela yokungasebenzi eshiya ixhoba lithwaxwa kukuthandabuza kwaye ligcwele kukungazithembi. Ngokubeka umntu phantsi kwemicroscope kwaye agxeke yonke into abayenzayo, aba bantu baphethe gadalala bayakwazi ukonakalisa ngakumbi amaxhoba abo. Oku kubashiya bekwimeko yokuba sesichengeni sokuxhomekeka kumxhaphazi wabo ngayo nayiphi na indlela nasekwenzeni izigqibo.
Ezi zezinye zeendlela ezininzi zokungasebenzi ezinokuthi zenzeke. Ngokwenyani, naliphi na igama okanye isenzo esenzelwe ukuthob 'isidima somnye umntu sinokujongwa njengendlela yokungamenzi nto.
Ukufunda okubaluleke ngakumbi kwe-narcissist (inqaku liyaqhubeka ngezantsi):
Wwe kurt angle umxholo wengoma
- AbaLwimi beeNarcissist basebenzise ukuGweba kunye nokuKhathaza amaxhoba abo
- Indlela yokujongana neNarcissist: Ekuphela kwendlela eQinisekisiweyo yokuSebenza
- Iindlela zokuKopa xa ushiya iqabane laseNarcissistic ngasemva
- Ungamenzakalisa njani uNarcissist
- ICoververt Narcissist: Iintloni, iintlobo eziNgenisiweyo zinokuba ziiNarcissists
- Izinto ezi-8 i-Narcissist ayinakuze ikwenzele yona (okanye nabani na ongomnye)
Ulawulo
Ukuchongwa kunye nokungasebenzi kungakhokelela kwi-narcissist okanye kwi-sociopath ukuze ikwazi ukulawula abanye. Olu lawulo yinto abayilangazelela ngokungapheliyo ngenxa yokuba ivumela ukuba banciphise umngcipheko kwi-ego yabo. Ukuba bayoyika nantoni na, sisibetho kwi-ego abathembele kuyo kakhulu ukuze basebenze ebomini.
Onke amagama abo kunye nezenzo zabo ezibaliweyo ziyilelwe ukuzinyusa ngokwabo kwisikhundla segunya namandla. Ukusuka apha banakho lawula umntu kakhulu njengoko bezama ukulawula imeko-bume yabo. Ayinamsebenzi ukuba eli gunya liyinkohliso, bayadlala ngalo kwaye bazame ukweyisela abanye ngalo, kwaye bahlala bephumelela. Bangamagcisa ngokufanelekileyo kule nkalo.
Olu lawulo luyimfuneko kwi-narcissist okanye kwi-sociopath ngenxa yendlela abajonga ngayo yonke into engqongileyo njengolwandiso lwabo. Njengokuba ulixabisile ulawulo onalo kwiintshukumo zakho, bayakubona ukwenziwa kwabanye ngokukhanya okufanayo. Kubo, ayiyonto ngaphandle kwendlela yendalo yokwenza ishishini.
Ngaphezulu koku, ukuma kwabo embindini wendalo yonke kuthetha ukuba akukho mntu ubaluleke ngaphezu kwabo, kwaye iimfuno zabo kufuneka zibekwe phambili kubo bonke abanye. Yiyo le ndlela yokucinga evumela ukuba bangamhoyi wonke umntu ngendlela engacacanga abazibeka kwindawo yokuqala maxa onke ngaphandle kokuchaphazeleka oku kunokuba nako.
Obu buntu buyafuna ukulawula abanye ngenxa yabo, efihliweyo, nokhuseleko. Ngaphakathi, abavakalelwa kulawulo konke konke, endaweni yoko bajolise kwimizamo yabo yokulawula uninzi lwehlabathi lwangaphandle kangangoko banako, kwaye oku kubandakanya abantu.
Ewe kunjalo, kulo naluphi na uhlobo lobudlelwane nomntu onjalo, olu lawulo lunokuzibonakalisa ngeendlela ezininzi. Kwiimeko zothando, kungabandakanya ukuxelela ixhoba labo ukuba bangabona kwaye bangakwazi ukubona, ukuba nomona ngabanye, nokuthatha zonke izigqibo zezemali. Kubudlelwane phakathi komzali nomntwana, oko kunokuthetha ukuyalela indlela emayilandelwe, zeziphi izinto endizithandayo kunye nendlela yokunxiba. Inokuphambukela nakwimimandla emnyama ngakumbi njengoko siza kuthetha ngoku.
Ukungahloniphi imida yobuqu
Iinjongo kunye nemfuno yolawulo zidibanisa ukwenza enye yezona zinto zonakalisayo ze-narcissists kunye ne-sociopaths. Kusisiphumo sokudimazeka, nangona ngandlela thile iseyindlela yokukufezekisa. Kuba abantu zizinto nje ekufuneka zisetyenzisiwe kwaye zilawulwe emehlweni abo, uninzi alunantandabuzo xa kufikwa ekuhlaseleni indawo yobuqu kunye nokuxhaphaza amaxhoba ngokwasemzimbeni nangokwesondo.
Basilela ngokupheleleyo kuyo nayiphi na ikhowudi yokuziphatha ebathintelayo ekuthobeleni amaxhoba abo kwizilingo ezinokuthi zibabangele ubomi babo bonke. Nokuba badibana nenkcaso okanye uqhankqalazo, bayakwazi ukwala iimvakalelo zaloo mntu komnye umboniso wokungasebenzi.
Nokuba akukho kunxibelelana ngokwasemzimbeni, bahlala bema ngabom kufutshane nabanye abantu ukuzama ukuzama ukubalawula. Okanye banokufika ekhayeni lakho ungamenywanga nje ukubonisa ukuba bayalawula. Nokuba into ebonakala imsulwa, njengokufowunela umntu osebenza naye kude kube sebusuku kunokuba alinde kude kube kusasa ukuze athethe ngalo mbandela, yindlela yabo yokungahoyi imida yakho .
Ezi zi-4 zamanqaku aphambili xa kufikwa kwindlela yokusetyenziswa kwamanyala esetyenziswa zii-narcissists kunye ne-sociopaths. Ayilulo uluhlu olupheleleyo kwaye zininzi ezinye iindlela abanokuzisebenzisa, zombini ezifihlakeleyo kwaye ezingacacanga kangako. Kungenxa yoko le nto kufuneka ugcine ubukrelekrele bakho ngawo onke amaxesha ukuzama ukufumanisa ezi zinto kunye nezinye iindlela zokuziphatha ngokukhawuleza.
Ngaba kukho nasiphi na isandi esiqhelekileyo kuwe? Shiya iikhomenti ezingezantsi ukuze wabelane ngebali lakho.