Uye wavelisa iimvakalelo ezinamandla ngokwenene kumntu ongazange wabandakanyeka naye.
Kodwa ngoku uyazi ukuba ngekhe kulunge. Okanye mhlawumbi uhlala uyazi.
Mhlawumbi ubacelile baphuma bathi hayi. Mhlawumbi bakubudlelwane. Okanye mhlawumbi kukho zonke iintlobo zezinye izizathu zokuba kutheni nobabini ningalingani kwaye akukho thuba lokwenza ulwalamano lusebenze.
Nokuba kwenzeke ntoni, uyazi ukuba lixesha lokuba uqhubeke nobomi kwaye umshiye lo mntu ngasemva.
isayine ukuba isithandwa sakho asisakuthandi
Kodwa ufumanisa ukuba kulula ukuthetha kunokwenza, yiyo loo nto ulapha, ufunda oku.
Ukufumana umntu ongazange wathandana naye kunokuba nzima. Kuba akukho qhekezo laseburhulumenteni kwaye akukho mzuzu xa umgca utsalwa entlabathini kwaye uyazi ukuba uphelile, kunokuba nzima ukugqiba ukuba kwanele kwaye lixesha lokuba ubasuse entlokweni yakho.
Ixhomekeke kuwe ukwenza umsebenzi kwaye ubashiye ngasemva.
Ezi ziimvakalelo ezinzima ukuba usebenze, ngakumbi ukuba le yinto ongazange wayifumana ngaphambili. Kodwa ngethemba ukuba ingcebiso oyifumanayo apha iya kukunceda kule nto kwaye ikushiye ulungele ukufumana uhlobo lothando olufanele ngokwenene.
Uziva njani nyhani?
Izinto zokuqala kuqala, kubalulekile ukuba ufumanise ukuba zithini na iimvakalelo zakho malunga nalo mntu ungakhange ude uthandane nazo.
Ngaba luthando? Bambalwa kuthi abantu abanokuthandana ngokwenyani bodwa, kodwa kusoloko kunokwenzeka ukuba ngenene uwile entloko ngenxa yalomntu. Kwaye kukho ithuba lokuba uvakalelwe ngendlela efanayo.
Kodwa ngaba yenye into?
Ngaba yayisendleleni eya ekubeni luthando, kodwa ayizange ifike apho? Ngaba yayikukufudumala nothando nje? Ngaba yayiyinkanuko nomtsalane ngokwasemzimbeni?
Yintoni le ikutsalile kubo?
Inkangeleko yabo yomzimba? Ingqondo yabo? Ngaba bakwenzile ukuba ucinge? Ngaba bahlekisile? Ngaba bakubiyele?
Ngaba ikho enye into ebisisiseko seemvakalelo zakho?
Kuya kufuneka uphinde ucinge malunga nokuba ikho enye into exhasa ezo mvakalelo into engahambelani ngqo nento oyithandayo.
Ngaba kunokwenzeka ukuba iimvakalelo zakho zibangelwe ngumnqweno wakho wokuba neqabane ngokubanzi? Mhlawumbi ungathanda nje ukuba nomntu oza kwabelana ngobomi bakho kunye neshawa ngothando.
Kukwafanelekile ukuba uqwalasele ukuba ingaba le nto yokuba obu budlelwane ayinakuba nayo ikamva ayinanto yakwenza nesizathu sokuba uphuhlise ezi mvakalelo kwasekuqaleni.
Ukuba bakubudlelwane okanye sikhona esinye isizathu sokuba kungasebenzi kwaye uyazi ukuba azifumaneki ukusukela kusuku lokuqala, mhlawumbi yayikukungafumaneki okukutsalelayo.
Ukuba uyazi ukuba awunamntu, ngamanye amaxesha ungayeka unogada wakho kwaye uqalise ukuthelekelela ubudlelwane kunye nabo, ukhuselekile kulwazi kuhlala kuyintelekelelo, kwaye ungaze ube yinyani eyoyikisayo.
Usenokuba uzive ngathi kukhuselekile ukuchitha ixesha kunye nabo kuba izinto phakathi kwenu bezingenakwenzeka, kwaye nigqibe ukuba niphathe iimvakalelo ezifanayo ngokufanayo.
Cinga ngento ebiya kuba yinyani.
Ukuthetha ngokwenyani, kufanelekile ukuba uthathe ixesha lokujonga ukuba loluphi ulwalamano lokwenyani phakathi kwakho ngenene ukuba lwaluya kubonakala ngathi, ukuba wawukhe wafika kuloo ndawo.
Kuba awuzange uphinde uthandane nabo, mhlawumbi uthandana nefantasy.
Intombi yam ikhulile indikhohlakele
Uye wakha umbono opheleleyo entlokweni yakho ukuba ubuhlobo bakho bobuxoki nalo mntu buya kujongeka kanjani, kwaye kubonakala ngathi buhle.
Ukuba unengxaki yokuziyeka, zama ukuthelekelela ukuba loluphi ulwalamano lokwenyani nobomi bokwenyani obuya kujongeka kanjani.
Khawufane ucinge umlo wakho wokuqala, kufuneka ukhethe iikawusi zabo ezingcolileyo phezulu emgangathweni, imikhwa yabo ecaphukisayo ejikeleze indlu, kufuneka bathathele ingqalelo iimfuno zabo nanini na xa usenza isigqibo okanye usenza ucwangciso lwakho…
Khawufane ucinge ukuba ubunyani bobudlelwane bakho bebungayi kuba yintoni, kwaye uya kubafumana ngokukhawuleza okukhulu kunokuba ugcina ugxile kwilizwe lamaphupha.
Ufunde ntoni?
Lonke ulwalamano esinalo lusifundisa okuthile. Ewe, nkqu nezo zinomntu ongazange waba ngowakho kwasekuqaleni.
La mava akufundise ntoni ngawe? Ngobuthathaka bakho? Malunga nezinto eziphambili ngokubaluleka? Malunga nento oyikhangelayo kwiqabane eligqibeleleyo?
Kwenzeka njani ukuba uwele emntwini ongabuyiseliyo? Zeziphi iimpawu ezilumkisayo ekufuneka ujonge kuzo kwixesha elizayo?
Ukujonga oku njengamava emfundo kunokukunceda ukuba uyamkele kwaye uqhubeke kwizinto ezinkulu kunye ezingcono.
Iingcebiso ezi-8 zokuqhubela phambili.
Uninzi lwezi ngcebiso zilandelayo zizinto onokuzifumana nakweliphi inqaku elilungileyo malunga nendlela yokufumana umntu. Banokuba ngama-clichés, kodwa kungenxa yokuba bayinyani.
Nokuba awuzange uphinde uthandane nalo mntu, inkqubo yokufumana ngaphezulu kwayo iya kuhlala ifana.
wazi njani ukuba intombazana iyakuthanda kodwa iyayifihla
Kodwa kufanele ukuba kube lula, kuba ngekhe ibe yinxalenye enkulu yobomi bakho bemihla ngemihla ngoku ekufanele ukuba uzilungiselele ukuhlala ngaphandle.
Konke malunga nokuhlala uxakekile kwaye uzikhumbuze ukuba umhle kangakanani kwaye 'wonele'.
1. Dibana nabantu abatsha.
Ukudibana nomntu omtsha ngokuqinisekileyo ayisiyiyo yodwa indlela yokufumana umntu, kwaye kuya kufuneka ulumke ngalo lonke ixesha ubuyela , njengoko ungonzakalisa kwaye wenzakalise omnye umntu.
Logama ulumkile, ukuzibeka phaya kwindawo yokuthandana sisikhumbuzo esikhulu sokuba zininzi iintlanzi elwandle.
andinabahlobo kwaye akukho nto ndinokuyenza
Indawo yokudlala ngothando engenabungozi yinto ekhuthazayo yokukhumbuza ukuba uyathandeka, unomdla, kwaye nabani na angaba nethamsanqa lokuba nawe.
Ukuba u madolw 'anzima ukuthandana, emva koko kwanokufumana nje iindlela zokwenza ubuhlobo obutsha beplato kunokuba luncedo olukhulu.
2. Zigcine uxakekile.
Nabani na okhe waphathwa yintliziyo nangaluphi na uhlobo uyazi eyona ndlela yokugqitha kuyo kukugcina ingqondo yakho ixakeke zezinye izinto.
Le meko ayihlukanga. Musa ukuzongamela, kodwa zigcine uxakekile usenza zonke izinto ozithandayo kunye nokuchitha ixesha nabantu obathandayo.
3. Thetha nomhlobo omthembileyo.
Ukuthetha ngeemvakalelo zakho nomntu omthembileyo kunokukunceda uziqonde ngcono.
Ukuba udidekile malunga nengcambu yezi mvakalelo, ukubeka ngamagama kunokukunceda ukuba uyiqonde.
Ngokwenene zikho iingxaki ezimbalwa zokuchitha ubusuku nomhlobo olungileyo, ibhotile yewayini, kunye nokutya okumnandi akunakulungiswa.
4. Kodwa ungazivumeli ukuba uhlale.
Kubalulekile ukuba uthethe nabantu ngezi mvakalelo kunokuba uzigcinele nje.
Kodwa kufuneka ulumke ungagabadeli kwelinye icala. Ukuba ufumanisa ukuba uzisa lo mntu nabahlobo bakho ngalo lonke ixesha, basese phambili kwengqondo yakho kwaye kufuneka bafayilishwe kude.
kumnandi ukuthanda izinto zothando zemihla ngemihla zokwenza intombi yakho
Nanini na xa uziva unqwenela ukubakhankanya okanye uzifumane ufuna ukuskrolela umva ngemiyalezo okanye uhlalutye into yokugqibela abayithethileyo kuwe ngama-50thixesha, zibambe kwaye uziphazamise ngokunenye into.
5. Yondla umzimba wakho.
Uhamba ngexesha elinzima leemvakalelo ngoku, ke musa ukuyenza mandundu loo nto ngokungazikhathaleli.
Qiniseka ukuba utya kakuhle, usele amanzi aneleyo, ufumana ukulala iiyure ezisibhozo eziqinileyo, kunye nokufumana umthambo omninzi wokunceda ukukhulisa ezo endorphins.
6. Yondla ingqondo yakho.
Akukho mntu umi phakathi kwakho kwaye ubhake uthotho lwakho oluthandayo okanye ubukele ukubuyela umva kwe-com coms. Kodwa ukuba ufuna ukuphazamiseka, unokufuna ukufunda ngento enomdla wokwenene.
Ziphazamise ngeepodcast, amaxwebhu, iincwadi, okanye nezifundo. Intlungu yentliziyo inokuba sisikhuthazi sokwenyani, ke jonga ukuba ungayitshintsha kwaye uyenze banzi ingqondo yakho.
7. Ungabalandeli kwimidiya yoluntu.
Zenzele ubabalo kwaye uqiniseke ukuba abazukuvela kumda wexesha lakho xa ungalindelanga.
Ungabalandeli, ukuze ungalingeki ukuba ubabambe, okanye ubuncinci ufihle iiposti zabo. Mhlawumbi usenokuya kwi-detox yemidiya yoluntu ekuncedeni ukucoca intloko.
8. Yiba nomonde.
Ukusukela okokugqiba kwakho ukubeka umntu emva kwakho, kubaluleke kakhulu ukuba ube nomonde nesiqu sakho.
Ukufumana ngaphezulu komntu ayisiyonto onokuyenza nje ngobusuku nje obunye, ngoko ungamangaliswa ukuba kuthatha ixesha kunye nomzamo ukubakhupha entlokweni yakho kube kanye.
Ngaba awuqinisekanga ukuba wenzeni ngeemvakalelo zakho ngalo mntu? Thetha kwi-Intanethi kwingcali yobudlelwane kwi-Relationship Hero enokukunceda ufumane izinto. Ngokulula.
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