Ulwalamano. Mhlawumbi ixesha elide.
Kwaye ngoku, kutshanje, kuye kwakho omnye umntu engqondweni yakho.
Uphuhlise iimvakalelo zomntu ongelilo iqabane lakho.
Kwaye uyasokola ukuqonda ukuba kufuneka wenze ntoni ngayo.
Iziphumo zezi, iimvakalelo zakho ziphuhlise ngokwabo, kwaye kungcono ndikuthathe ungalindelanga.
Ndicinga ukuba awuphumanga ngenjongo ukhangela umntu omtsha. Ukuba uyenzile, loo nto ngeketile eyahlukileyo yeentlanzi ngokupheleleyo.
Mhlawumbi ubudlelwane bakho buhamba ngokumangalisayo, okanye mhlawumbi bekuhamba ngesiqwengana…
Nokuba yeyiphi na indlela, uzifumene ukwimeko ekhohlisayo, kwaye mhlawumbi uziva udidekile ngemibuzo emininzi ebaleka engqondweni yakho.
Zithetha ntoni ezi mvakalelo kulwalamano lwakho?
Ngaba kunokwenzeka ukuba neemvakalelo zabantu ababini ngaxeshanye?
Kutheni usenokuziva ngolu hlobo nje?
Kwaye ufanele wenze ntoni ngayo?
Le yimeko edidayo kakhulu ukuba ube kuyo, ke masiyaphule ngokwamanqanaba.
Okokuqala, uza kuba nethuba lokuphonononga indlela oziva ngayo.
Ke, siyakomba nzulu kwaye sicinge malunga nokuba zivela phi na ezo mvakalelo.
Okokugqibela, Siza kucinga malunga nokuba ezi mvakalelo zinokuthetha ntoni kubudlelwane bakho kunye nendlela ekufuneka uqale ngayo ukuya phambili ukusuka apha.
Elinye lala manqanaba mathathu liya kuba lula kakhulu kuwe ngoncedo lobuchwephesha bobudlelwane. Ukuba nomntu ongathathi cala ngokupheleleyo ukuba athethe naye kwaye afumane ingxelo kunye neengcebiso malunga nemeko yakho kuya kuba ngcono kunokuhamba wedwa. Sincoma kakhulu inkonzo ye-Intanethi ukusuka. Ungancokola nomntu ukonwaba kwikhaya lakho (okanye kwenye indawo ukuba uhlala neqabane lakho) ngexesha elifanelekileyo. ukunxibelelana nenye yeengcali ngoku.
Inqanaba lokuqala: ukuphonononga iimvakalelo zakho.
Ke, uyazi ukuba lo mntu uziva ngathi unento. Kodwa, ukuba usebudlelwaneni, mhlawumbi uyazifihla ezi mvakalelo kunokuba ujongane nazo kwaye uzivavanye.
Kunzima kunokuba kunokuba, lixesha lokuba ukhulule iimvakalelo zakho.
Bakhuphe ebhokisini ububafihle kwaye uqwalasele ukuba luhlobo luni lweemvakalelo olu.
Buza imibuzo efana nale:
Ngaba ngumtsalane wesini?
- Ungu Ukufumana inkanuko kulo mntu ?
- Ngaba unqwenela ukudibana nabo?
- Ngaba ubuntu babo bukutsala?
- Ngaba uyakonwabela ukuba kunye nabo?
- Ngaba bayakuhleka?
- Ngaba uyafuna ukuchitha ixesha kunye nabo?
- Ngaba uyafuna ukwazi uluvo lwabo kwizinto?
-Ukuba uthembekile ngokupheleleyo, ungakhe uzibone kubudlelwane obuhlala buhleli nalo mntu?
Inqanaba lesibini: ukuqonda oyena nobangela weemvakalelo zakho.
Kulungile, ke ngoku uchithe ixesha ucinga ukuba luhlobo luni lweemvakalelo zakho kulo mntu, lixesha lokucinga ukuba bavela phi.
Kukho imimandla emithathu ephambili ekufuneka uyiqwalasele: ngaba ziziphumo zomntu uqobo, ngaba ziziphumo zobudlelwane obukhoyo ngoku, okanye ngaba zonke ziphantsi kwento eyenzekayo nawe, kwaye akukho nto yokwenza noku umntu okanye iqabane lakho konke konke?
Makhe sizihlolisise ngakumbi.
1. Uyabathanda ngenxa yabo.
Mhlawumbi ubudlelwane bakho buhamba kakuhle. Uyonwabile kwaye uzalisekisile neqabane lakho, kwaye ngokunyanisekileyo ufuna ukuqhubeka nokwakha ubomi bakho kunye nabo.
Kule meko, ukuba udibene nomntu onomdla kuye, inokuba phantsi ngokupheleleyo konxibelelwano onalo naloo mntu.
Akusoloko kufuneka ujonge izizathu ezingunobangela. Kungalula njengokuvuma ukuba utsaleleke kubo ukuba banjani.
Qwalasela ngononophelo ukuba ngaba kunjalo ngenene. Ukuba ucinga ukuba kunjalo, ungawubeka umnwe wakho kwinto engabo ibenza babaluleke kangaka?
indlela yokwenza umfana akuhloniphe emva kokulala naye
Kutheni le nto benayo, ngokukodwa, ethe yakubamba iliso?
Usenokungakwazi ukuyibeka ngamagama, kodwa kuya kufuneka ubenakho ukuqonda ukuba ingaba zizinto ezizodwa ngokwenene na.
2. Ubudlelwane bakho buhamba ngesiqwengana esinamatye.
Ewe kunjalo, ngamanye amaxesha kukho izizathu ezibangela imeko yemicimbi enolwalamano olulo.
Iimvakalelo oziphuhlisileyo komnye umntu zisenokungabi nanto ingako yokwenza nomntu oziva ngaye, kodwa naye yintoni engekhoyo kulwalamano olukulo.
Mhlawumbi unqwenela uthando lomzimba.
Mhlawumbi unqwenela ukusondelelana ngokweemvakalelo.
Mhlawumbi uziva ungahoywanga, ungathandwa, ungaqondwa, Kwaye ndiqale ukukhangela kwenye indawo umntu onokukunika izinto ezingenziwa liqabane lakho.
Xa umntu evakalelwa ngolu hlobo, kunokuba lula ukuqala ukufumana iimvakalelo zothando komnye umntu.
Ezo mvakalelo ayisosiphumo sokuba umntu abaluleke ngokukodwa, kodwa kungenxa yokuba ukhangela umntu, nabani na, ukuba angene.
Kwiimeko ezinje ngezi, kuya kufuneka ususe ukugxila emntwini ophuhlise iimvakalelo zakhe kwaye uhambise kubudlelwane bakho.
3. Unezinto ezithile ekufuneka usebenze ngazo.
Ukuba ujonge kwenye indawo, sukuhlala ucinga ukuba lulwalamano olukulo yingxaki.
kutheni engazundibuza ukuba uyandithanda na
Kungenzeka ukuba unemicimbi yobuqu ethetha ukuba ukufumanisa kunzima ukuba kubudlelwane kwaye unokuba uzama nokuzikhusela.
Mhlawumbi unemicimbi nge ukuzibophelela , okanye ulwalamano.
Mhlawumbi ulindele lukhulu kakhulu kwiqabane kwaye uqale ukhangele kwenye indawo xa iqabane lakho lingenako ukuhlangabezana nolindelo lwakho olungeyonyani.
Thatha ixesha lokujonga ukuba ingaba ikhona na into kuwe ekufuneka uyisebenzele ekhokelele kwezi mvakalelo.
Isigaba sesithathu: ukuya phambili.
Ndiqinisekile andidingi kukuxelela ukuba le meko ayizinzanga.
Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, ukuba ufunda eli nqaku, iimvakalelo ohlangabezana nazo zinokuba ngaphezulu kancinci kunokuba yinto nje edlulayo.
Ke, lixesha lokujonga ukuba uza kuhamba njani ukusuka kwimeko.
Ukuba uthatha isigqibo sokulandela iimvakalelo zakho.
Unokuthatha isigqibo sokuba iimvakalelo zakho ngalo mntu ziyinyani.
Akukho mfuneko yokuba ndikuxelele le nto, kodwa Awunakwenza nto malunga nezo mvakalelo ngelixa usebudlelwaneni.
Kungakulinga ukujonga isiqinisekiso kwinto oyithandayo ukuba babuye babuye nayo ngaphambi kokuba wohlukane neqabane lakho, kodwa oko akulunganga nakubani na.
Kufuneke u phelisa ubudlelwane okhoyo ngoku Phambi kokuba uthathe isigqibo sokuya emntwini onomdla kuye, wazi ngokupheleleyo ukuba umntu lowo unokukulahla.
Ngokwenza oku, uyaqonda ukuba iimvakalelo zakho ngalo mntu zomelele ngokwaneleyo ukuba zingachitheka ubudlelwane bakho.
Isenokuba sisiqalo sento entle, kodwa kufuneka uyazi ukuba kuya kubakho iintlungu ezininzi ezibandakanyekileyo.
Ukuba uthatha isigqibo sokuhlala neqabane lakho.
Kwelinye icala, unokuthatha isigqibo sokuba into oyifumene neqabane lakho ikhethekile, kwaye ufuna ukuhlala nabo.
Kwimeko apho, kuya kufuneka uzobe umgca phantsi kweemvakalelo zakho kulo mntu.
Sisigqibo sakho nokuba uziva ukuba ufuna ukuxelela iqabane lakho malunga neemvakalelo obukade unazo.
Kukho impikiswano yezi zifundo zombini, kodwa ekugqibeleni iphantsi kwakho, ukuba akukho nto yenzekileyo phakathi kwakho nomntu onemvakalelo ngaye.
Ukuba nantoni na iqhubekile, kuya kufuneka unyaniseke kwiqabane lakho malunga nayo.
Kodwa ukuba ziimvakalelo nje kwicala lakho, kwaye akukho nto iyenye, unokuthatha isigqibo sokuba ungalixeleli iqabane lakho.
Ukuba ucinga ukuba ibe sisiphumo semicimbi kubudlelwane bakho, ke iqabane lakho kusenokwenzeka ukuba lifuna ukwazi ukuba ubusoloko ucinga ntoni kwaye uziva njani ukuze nobabini nenze isigqibo esifanelekileyo sokusebenza kule miba kwaye niqhubele phambili kunye.
Qinisekisa ukuba ukhetha ixesha elifanelekileyo lokuba nencoko leyo, xa nobabini nondlekile, niphumle ngokwaneleyo, kwaye niphilile.
Ngokusisiseko, isazela sakho siyakuhlala sikwazisa ukuba le yingxoxo ekufuneka yenziwe.
Ukuba uqaphele ukuba esi sisiphumo semicimbi yobuqu engaphantsi, kuya kufuneka uthathe amanyathelo asebenzayo ukuze usebenze kuwo, ukuze olu hlobo lwento lungaphinde lwenzeke.
Nokuba yeyiphi na indlela, kwihlabathi elifanelekileyo ungayeka ukunxibelelana nomntu obukade unemvakalelo ngaye.
Xa ungamboni akekho sengqondweni.
Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, ukuba uzimisele ngokuqhubeka nobudlelwane bakho, ukunxibelelana nalo mntu kunokwenza izinto zikhohlise.
Kodwa, ewe, asihlali kwihlabathi elifanelekileyo, kungangumntu ongenakubaleka. Mhlawumbi umntu osebenza naye okanye ubona okuninzi ngalo naliphi na inani lezizathu.
Kwimeko apho, kuya kufuneka ube namandla engqondo ukuze ukwazi beka iimvakalelo zakho ecaleni.
Usenganciphisa ixesha olichitha unxibelelana nabo kwaye ulawule nohlobo lwolo nxibelelwano.
Akukho mpendulo ilungileyo.
Ukuba uzifumene ukwimeko enje, eyona nto iphambili kukuba uthembeke kwisiqu sakho, kwaye uqiniseke ukuba wenza konke okusemandleni akho ukuqinisekisa ukuba akukho mntu wenzakalayo (ngaphezulu kokufunekayo).
Iimeko ezinje ngezi ziyakhohlisa ukuhamba, kodwa ukuba uthembekile, unolwazelelelo, kwaye ungazivumeli ukuba uqhutyelwe ziimvakalelo zakho ngaphambi kokuba uqonde ukuba zithetha ntoni kanye kanye, elona nyathelo lililo kufuneka likhawuleze kucace.
Ngaba awuqinisekanga ukuba wenzeni ngeemvakalelo zakho ngalo mntu?Kutheni usokola ngale meko inzima wedwa? Endaweni yoko, thetha nengcali yobudlelwane eqeqeshiweyo eya kukumamela kwaye ikukhokelele kuso nasiphi na isiphumo esikulungele. Ngamanye amaxesha kuyanceda ukuthetha izinto ukuya kufikelela kwezona mvakalelo zakho zinyanisekileyo malunga nemeko ethile.Ke ncokola kwi-Intanethi kwenye yeengcali ezivela kwiQabane lobuhlobo ezinokukunceda ufumane izinto. Ngokulula.
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