Buza umntu esitalatweni ukuba yintoni intsingiselo yobomi kwaye kunokwenzeka ukuba udibane nokujonga okungenanto.
Kungenxa yokuba, ngelixa siphila ixesha elide kunanini na ngaphambili kwaye sonwabela intuthuzelo ebekuya kuba zizinto zamaphupha kuphela kwiminyaka eyi-100 eyadlulayo, uluntu aluzukufumana mbuzo osisiseko osengqondweni yomntu wonke: iyintoni injongo yako konke ?
Ugqirha wezifo zengqondo waseOstriya uViktor E. Frankl waqamba igama elithi 'into ekhoyo' kwincwadi yakhe ethi Man's Search For Meaning ka-1946, wayichaza “njengeyona nto ibalulekileyo ebomini [bethu].”
Njengabantu, sinobuchule bokwenza njalo ubomi bemibuzo into egqitha ngaphaya kokuqhutywa sisiqhelo kookhokho bethu bezilwanyana. Kwangelo xesha, inkcubeko yethu yemveli yokuphila kunye nembono yayo emxinwa kakhulu ithathelwe indawo yile inika ukhetho olungenamda kunye nethuba.
Akunyanzelekanga ukuba silandele ookhokho bethu ukuba sibe yiyo nantoni na esifuna ukuba yiyo.
Kwaye ke, oku ke kucela umbuzo: sifuna ukuba yintoni?
Ukuze siqale ukuphendula le nto, sijonge eluntwini ukuba sikhokelwe kwaye, kwesi simangalo, uluntu lusilele.
Ukwenza njalo ngobuninzi beendlela, kodwa nazi ezi-9 zibaluleke kakhulu:
1. Ukusukela ulonwabo
Ndicinga ukuba sonke sifuna ulonwabo ngolunye uhlobo okanye ngolunye uhlobo kwaye ngokuqinisekileyo andiphikisani nokulandela ngokuchaseneyo, ndiyakholelwa ukuba inokuba ngumqhubi wotshintsho oluqinisekileyo kumntu.
Ukungaqiniseki kwam kujolise ngqo kuluntu lwethu kunye nomyalezo osisiseko sokuba kubonakala ngathi kusasaza umyalezo wokuba nantoni na eyenye ngaphandle kokonwaba kukugula. Ukuze singabi lusizi, singaziva silahlekile, kwaye asinakubonwa ngathi siyasokola.
Uluntu lwaseMelika lubonakala lusemngciphekweni ngakumbi kule meko, ukuya kuthi ga kwinqanaba lokuba kubonakala ngathi lingene kumdibaniso wesizwe.
Ingxaki ilele kwinto yokuba awukwazi ukunyanzela ulonwabo ebantwini. Ke, xa uziva ungonelisekanga, ungadibaniswanga okanye ulusizi nje ngento ethile, isiphumo kukuziva ulilolo kunye neentloni.
2. Ukuthenga / ukuthanda izinto eziphathekayo
Uninzi lwabantu lubonakala lufuna okungakumbi ebomini, ngaphandle kwento esele benayo. Bafuna ukuthenga izinto ezininzi kunye nezinto ezintle ngelizama ukuziva bephelele.
Nokuba uyibiza ngokuba kukuthenga okanye ukuthanda izinto, kukho impikiswano eqinileyo yokuthetha ukuba ingunobangela kunye neempawu zokungabikho.
Imfuno yethu engapheliyo yokufumana intsingiselo ngokusetyenziswa kwayo bubungqina bobukho besithuba. Kungenzeka ukuba sikugqatso lweengalo ezilinganayo noontanga bethu ukuba sibaphume kuthi kwaye siyayibona indawo yethu kwitafile yeligi yezinto eziphathekayo njengophawu lwempumelelo yethu ebomini.
Ewe kunjalo, kukho intabalala yeenkampani phaya ezonwabileyo ukusinika umjelo oqhubekayo wezinto ezintsha kunye nezizodwa 'kufuneka-ube nazo' kwaye oku kunegalelo kumjikelo wokuziqhubela phambili.
3. Imidiya yokuncokola
Kudala ukuba ube nesangqa esincinci sabahlobo onxibelelana nabo kwaye ukuze wenze njalo kufuneka uthethe nabo emnxebeni okanye udibane nabo ngobuqu.
Khawuleza-uye phambili namhlanje kwaye ungathetha nakubani na, naphi na, nangaliphi na ixesha. Imithombo yeendaba kwezentlalo isivumele ukuba siqokelele 'abahlobo' kunye 'nabalandeli' kwizinga lokuba uninzi lwethu ngoku lunokunxibelelana namakhulu okanye amawaka abantu ngaxeshanye.
Ngokuqinisekileyo, unxibelelwano olukhawulezileyo olunje lunokuqhuba utshintsho-jonga nje kwindima edlalwe nguTwitter kwiArab Spring - kodwa ikwasinika iwindow kubomi babantu abaninzi.
Ngokungqina ubomi babantu abaninzi, ngokuqinisekileyo uyazigweba ngokuqatha. Kukho abantu abanemisebenzi engcono kunawe, amaqabane akhangeleka ngcono, izindlu ezingcono, iimoto ezingcono, iiholide ezibukeka kakuhle, imali eninzi, kunye nobomi bosapho obonwabileyo akukho ndlela zinokuzithelekisa nabanye.
Ngakumbi abantu 'obaziyo', kokukhona abantu oya kubona ukuba benza ngcono kunaye. Phambi kweendaba zosasazo, unokukwazi ukuzithelekisa nabahlobo bakho, amalungu osapho, kunye nabantu abadumileyo. Kwaye ngenxa yokuba abahlobo bakho abasenyongweni kusenokwenzeka ukuba bakwimeko efanayo yezentlalo noqoqosho, umahluko kubutyebi nakwimpumelelo yemali ibincinci. Zonke ezo zinto zihambile ngoku.
4. Ukunyuka kwabaDumileyo
Uluntu lwanamhlanje lubeka ugxininiso kubantu abadumileyo kwaye, ngenxa yemithombo yeendaba zentlalo kunye nesantya apho izinto zihamba khona, kunokwenzeka ukuba nabani na afumane inqanaba lesikhundla sosaziwayo kwisithuba esifutshane sexesha.
Ngaphezulu, ngoku sinokufikelela nakubantu abadumileyo ngenxa yemithombo yeendaba engama-24/7, iinkqubo zeTV ezisekwe ngokupheleleyo kumxholo wosaziwayo, kunye nenkqubela phambili kwitekhnoloji.
Kubonakala ngathi sithanda kakhulu la manani oluntu, sichitha ixesha lethu elininzi siba kunye nabo, kangangokuba ubomi bethu buqala ukubonakala bungonelisi. Esi sibetho sokuthelekisa sibuye sibuyele entlokweni yaso embi njengoko sizama ukuba njengezithixo zethu nangayiphi na indlela esinokuyenza.
5. Imidiya yesiNtu
Ubuninzi bexesha lomoya kunye neeyintshi zekholamu kwimithombo yeendaba zosasazo zikanomathotholo, umabonwakude kunye nokuprinta zinikezelwe kumabali aneemvakalelo ezimbi.
Nantsi lapho ingcebiso ethile ukuba oku kwenzeka ngokuyinxenye ngenxa yokhetho lwethu lwentshabalalo kunye nezihloko ezimnyama- ukungakhathaleli kwethu - amajelo eendaba ahlangabezana nje neemfuno zawo.
Kodwa, ngaba ukuthembela kumajelo osasazo kwicala lokuhla kobomi kunokusenza sizive singonwabanga ngokubanzi? Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, ukuthambekela okuphezulu kumabali eendaba amabi kunokunciphisa okulindelweyo kwikamva.
Ukuba konke owakhe weva kwaye wafunda ngako kukubulala, imfazwe, indlala kunye nentlekele yendalo esingqongileyo, ungaqala ukuzibuza ukuba iyintoni injongo yako konke oku.
Kwaye ke, into ekhoyo ekhoyo iyaqiniswa.
Izithuba ezihambelanayo (inqaku liyaqhubeka ngezantsi):
- Iimpawu ze-6 ukuMiqobo yeNgxaki ekhoyo
- Ngaba ujonga intsingiselo yobomi kwindawo engeyiyo?
- Ukuba awuyazi into omawuyenze ngobomi bakho, funda le nto
- Ukudakumba okukhoyo: Ungazoyisa njani iimvakalelo zakho zokungabinantsingiselo
- Ungawuthintela njani umGibaniso weCrisis okhoyo ngeli xesha lokuKhula koMntu
6. Inkcubeko yeengxaki endaweni yeziSombululo
Nokuba kukwinqanaba likarhulumente, ekuhlaleni, okanye komntu ngamnye, kukho utyekelo lokujolisa ngakumbi kwiingxaki nakwimicimbi esijongene nayo endaweni yezisombululo ezinokubakho.
Ngelishwa, xa konke okwenzayo kujonga iingxaki, impendulo eqhelekileyo yabaninzi kukusola umntu okanye enye into. Oku kudala inkcubeko yokurhoxa kunye nokungabikho koncedo.
Le nkcubeko iyakhawuleza ukusasazeka phakathi kwabantu njengoko befuna ukudibanisa uxanduva. Njengoko isimo sengqondo samkelwa ngabantu abaninzi nangakumbi, kukwanjalo ukwamkeleka ngakumbi ukujonga iliso.
Yiloo nto kanye eyenzekayo kwimiba efana notshintsho lwemozulu, ubuhlwempu, ukungalingani kunye nemfazwe.
Ewe kukho abantu phakathi kwethu abazama ukufumana isisombululo kwezi, kunye nezinye, ezona ngxaki ziphambili, kodwa bambalwa kwaye bakude kakhulu.
isicatshulwa emva komyalezo wokuqala womhla wokuqala
Kodwa, kuninzi lwethu, ukungabinakuzinceda kungekudala kukhokelela ekuphelelweni lithemba kwaye siqala ukubandezeleka iingxaki ezikhoyo .
Endaweni yoko, sidinga uluntu olukhuthazayo nolusenza sikwazi ukwenza utshintsho lwenene ngezenzo zethu kuphela emva koko siya kuqala ukufuna izisombululo endaweni yeengxaki.
7. Ukuqhekeka Kweentsapho
Kuyinyani ebuhlungu yeli xesha langoku ukuba uninzi lwe-50% yemitshato iyakuphela kuqhawulo-mtshato kuxhomekeke kwindawo ohlala kuyo emhlabeni. Eyona nto ibuhlungu kukuba uninzi lolwahlulo luya kubandakanya umntwana okanye abantwana.
Ngelixa abanye boqhawulo-mtshato banokufumana imeko inika amandla, abanye abaninzi baya kuhlazeka, ubulolo okanye ubuze. Kwaye ikho ubungqina bokucebisa ukuba abantwana beentsapho ezinomzali omnye bathambekele ngakumbi kuxinzelelo, uxinzelelo kunye nokusetyenziswa gwenxa kweziyobisi kubomi babo babadala (imiqondiso yesithuba esikhoyo esachongwa nguFrankl ngokwakhe).
Nokuba yeyiphi na indlela eyaphuka ngayo iyunithi yosapho, iziphumo, gwenxa, azilunganga kwabo babandakanyekayo. Uluntu lwanamhlanje, nangona kunjalo, lwamkela ngakumbi iintsapho 'ezingaphelelanga', ngoko ke amathuba okuba abantu baya bekhula kwikhaya elinjalo.
8. Ukusilela Kwenkqubo Yemfundo
Ngelixa imfundo yendalo yonke ingekabikho eyinyani kwihlabathi liphela, apho ifumanekayo, ifunyanwa ilula.
Rhoqo, iinkqubo zemfundo zale mihla zigxila ekuxhobiseni umfundi ngezakhono eziyimfuneko abaya kuzifuna ukuze bafumane umsebenzi. Isimanga kukuba, ngaphandle kokufumana iziqinisekiso, abantu abaninzi bayasokola ukufumana nokubamba umsebenzi.
Kungenxa yokuba inkqubo igxile kakhulu kulwazi nakuqeqesho, kwaye incinci kakhulu kulwazi nakwinto endiyibiza ngokuba yimfundo eyinyani. Ubuntu buyathintelwa, ubuchule abukhuthazwa, kwaye ukubuza imeko ekhoyo akubonwa kuyinto elungileyo.
Abantu abancinci baphumelela kwinkqubo yemfundo ngengqondo egcwele i-hows, kodwa bambalwa kakhulu kutheni. Banokukwazi ukuzalisa ngokufanelekileyo indima, kodwa ayisoloko ingabo abantu abaqolileyo, abajikeleziweyo ukuba ngabaqeshi khangela.
Ukuba inkqubo yezemfundo ichithe ixesha elininzi kunye nezixhobo zokuphuhlisa imimoya yabafundi, ndicinga ukuba baya kuba nakho ukukhetha indlela efanelekileyo kubo. Endaweni yoko, bahanjiswa njengeenkomo kulwakhiwo olunemiqobo olungenzi nto ukubanceda bafumane olona lwazo.
Akumangalisi ukuba into ekhoyo inamandla phakathi kolutsha lwehlabathi.
9. Unyango lwaBadala
Kwiinkcubeko ezininzi ezisentshona, ixabiso elibekwe kubantu abadala liphantsi ngokufanelekileyo. Bakuba bengakwazi ukuzikhathalela, abantu abadala bapakishwa baya kumhlala phantsi apho bahlala bodwa kwiintsapho nabahlobo.
Thelekisa oku neenkcubeko ezininzi zemveli-ngakumbi ezo zikwiMpuma Ekude- apho izizukulwana ezindala zihlala kunye, kwaye zikhathalelwa ngabantwana babo abadala. Apha bahlala beyinxalenye yobomi bosapho.
Ngaba oku kungachaza ukuba kutheni iingxaki zobomi obuphakathi zixhaphake kakhulu eNtshona? Ngaba sijonga izihlobo zethu ezigugayo kwaye sizame ukunqanda ukuqonda ukuba nathi, siyaluphala yonke imihla edlulayo?
Nokuba zeziphi na izizathu, akukho mathandabuzo ukuba umhlaba ujongene nengxaki enentsingiselo uninzi lwethu lusokola kubomi bethu bonke ngenxa yokunqongophala kwayo kwaye luxanduva lwethu ngokudibeneyo ukutshintsha indlela yethu yokuhamba siye kubomi obunentsingiselo.
Ngaba uphethwe yingxaki ekhoyo, okanye ukhe wadlula kuyo ngaphambili? Shiya iikhomenti ezingezantsi kwaye wabelane ngeengcinga zakho kunye namava.
