Okulusizi kukuba, imibuzo enamanzi ayinakuphepheka xa uhlala nabantu.
Ingxaki ngombuzo ongenamdla kukuba wonke umntu unemigangatho eyahlukileyo yentsingiselo yeentsingiselo. Oko ukufumanisa kukungenelela, iqabane lakho lokuncokola linokonwaba ngokugqibeleleyo malunga nalo.
Ke xa bebuza loo mibuzo, abazami ukwenza ukuba uzive ungonwabanga okanye ungakhululekanga kwincoko.
IiBusybodies yingxaki eyahlukileyo. Aba ngabantu abaloba ulwazi ukuze babasebenzise kakubi. Banokufuna ukuyisebenzisa ukuqala umdlalo, ukuhleba, okanye ukukugweba ngendlela oqhuba ngayo ubomi bakho.
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Umntu oxakekileyo uhlala ezama ukungena kwishishini labanye abantu kuba befuna ukusebenzisa ishishini lakho njengolonwabo lwabo. Ukuba ngumhlobo, isihlobo, okanye umntu osebenza naye, banokufuna olo lwazi ukuzama ukulusebenzisa njengesixhobo sokukuchaphazela.
Umntu ongatshatanga unokubuzwa ngumzali wakhe ukuba uza kulifumana nini iqabane. Abantu abathandanayo banokubuza ukuba bazokutshata nini. Abantu abatshatileyo banokubuzwa ukuba bazakuba nabantwana nini. Banokubuza malunga nezemali, into oyenzayo ekhayeni lakho, luhlobo luni lwemisebenzi yangaphandle ovukayo, kutheni usenza le nto, kutheni ungenzi njalo.
Ukuqhubeka kunye nemibuzo engxamisekileyo iya. Ukujongana nabantu abanomdla kunye nemibuzo yabo akufuneki ibe nzima, nangona kunjalo. Kukho izinto ekufuneka uzenzile nokungafanelekanga ukuba uzenze xa uphatha loo mibuzo.
1. Sukuxoka malunga neempendulo.
Kungakulinga ukwenza into ukuze ufumane umntu onomqolo emqolo wakho, kodwa ungayenzi. Oku kunokubuyela ngokulula kuwe kamva.
Inokuba usandula ukudibana nomntu kwaye ukwinkqubo yokwazana, bakubuza umbuzo ongonwabanga ngawo, awubaxeleli inyani, kwaye ngoku unabo obo bujinga buxhonyiwe .
Kwenzeka ntoni ukuba nabahlobo abasenyongweni? Usenokungaziva ukhululekile ukuphendula umbuzo wabo ngoku, kodwa mhlawumbi kamva niya kuthi xa nazane bhetele.
Kuya kufuneka ugcine ubuxoki, obudinisayo kwaye buyacaphukisa ngokukhawuleza okukhulu. Okanye kuyakufuneka uvume ukuba uxokile kwaye unethemba lokuba lo mntu akazukucinga ukuba ungumntu onganyanisekanga. Banokuzifumanisa ngokuzikhethela ngokwabo kwiqela lesithathu kamva.
xa ungakhathali nantoni na
Nantoni na oyenzayo, sukuxoka ukuba ungayiphepha. Ubuxoki buya kuphela kakubi kuwe.
2. Qonda kwaye uthethe malunga nemida yakho.
Abantu abayi kuhlala beqonda xa besondela komnye wemida yakho. Kuya kufuneka ulungele ukuthetha ngayo kwaye ubazise ukuba badibene nenye.
Into ekufuneka uyithethile kukuba, 'Andiziva ndikhululekile ukuthetha ngaloo nto. Ngaba singathetha enye into? ”
Abantu abanengqiqo, abaneenjongo ezintle baya kuyihlonipha loo nto. Bayayiqonda into yokuba kukho ezinye izinto ongafuni ukuthetha ngazo. Kwaye ucinga ntoni? Mhlawumbi banezinto abangakhululekanga ukuthetha ngazo nazo!
Yiba nelizwi ukuba uziva ngathi umntu usondela kancinci kwimida yakho ukuze athuthuzele.
3. Lungiselela iimpendulo ezithambileyo ngaphambi kwexesha.
Ukulungiselela impendulo ngaphambi kwexesha kunokuthatha ukungahambi kakuhle kwimeko. Ukuba kukho umbuzo odla ngokubuzwa oziva ungalunganga okanye obangela ukuba ukhubeke, cinga ngokuba nempendulo ngaphambi kwexesha, ukuze ungacingi ngayo.
'Ayisiyonto ndikhululekile ukuthetha ngayo leyo.' isebenza kakuhle kwiimeko ezininzi.
Kodwa, ukuba uyafuna ukuphendula ukuze ufumane abantu bayeke ukubuza, kunokuba kuluncedo ukuphuhlisa impendulo onokuthi ukhululeke kuyo.
Umzekelo, kwimeko apho umntu abuza ukuba uza kuba nabantwana nini, ungaphendula ngento enje, 'Mhlawumbi kwixa elizayo.' okanye 'Asicwangcisi ukuba nabantwana.'
4. Baxelele inyani engacocwanga.
Olunye ukhetho lokususa umntu ongenaxhala kukubanika inyani engacocwanga, engafakwanga varnish, ke bayeke ukubuza imibuzo.
'Sizamile ukuba nabantwana, kodwa kukhokelele ekuphumeni kwesisu, ngenxa yoko asinabo abantwana.'
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Kungangonwabisi, kodwa ngamanye amaxesha yeyona ndlela yokufumana umntu ongakwaziyo ukuthatha uthsuphe wokubuyela umva ukuba ulungile ngokuhla ngaloo ndlela. Emva kwayo yonke loo nto, abantu abasoloko bejonga izinto ezimbi zobomi kunye nobuntu xa bebuza imibuzo.
Ngamanye amaxesha asifuni ukuphendula ngenxa yokuba imeko iyenzakalisa kakhulu okanye ineentlungu ezininzi kuyo. Kwaye ngamanye amaxesha kuyanceda ukukhumbuza umntu o-nosy ukuba kukho isizathu sokungabuzi imibuzo emininzi.
Kuphela ukuba ukhululekile kuloo nto, nangona kunjalo. Awunatyala nabani na.
5. Guqula isihloko okanye uphambuke.
Indlela elungileyo yokugcina incoko ishukuma kwaye ikude nesihloko esibuthathaka kukuphambuka kwaye utshintshe umxholo.
Into ekufuneka uyenzile kukuthetha into enje, 'Andikhululekanga ukuphendula lo mbuzo, kodwa ke, baqhuba njani abantwana bakho?'
Awunakuyitshintsha kuphela incoko, kodwa uya kuthintela nakuphi na ukuthuliswa okungathandekiyo apho umntu anokuthi aqale azive engazithembi okanye engonelanga ngokubuza umbuzo. Endaweni yoko, ungaya ngqo kumxholo owahlukileyo.
Ukuba banalo naluphi na ubabalo ekuhlaleni, baya kukuqonda okwenzayo kwaye balandele isikhokelo ozama ukusibeka.
Kodwa, ukuba abenzi njalo, banokuphinda babuyele kuyo, kwimeko apho unokufuna ukuthatha indlela enzima yokubuyisela umnqweno wakho wokungathethi ngale nto.
6. Cinga ukuba uthumela umyalezo ofanelekileyo.
Luhlobo luni lwemibuzo oyibuzayo? Ngaba imibuzo yakho ngokubanzi iyaphazamisa okanye yeyakho?
Kungenxa yokuba ukuba ubuza imibuzo yobuqu, umntu othetha naye usenokuba uphendula isimilo sakho ngokubuza eyabo imibuzo yobuqu.
Kukho amanqanaba ahlukeneyo engxoxo efanelekileyo, kuxhomekeke kwindlela omazi ngayo umntu. Banokucinga ukuba inqanaba labo lombuzo lilungele imeko leyo.
Ukuba awungomntu uncokola kamnandi, ungafuna ukuthatha ixesha lokujonga ukuba loluphi uhlobo lwemibuzo efanelekileyo ukuba ubuze umntu omaziyo okanye umhlobo omtsha, ke ngoko ukulungele ukuya kwiincoko ezizayo.
Ukusebenza ngaphambi kwexesha kuthetha ukuba akufuneki uzame ukuyenza kwangoko, enokuthi ingakonwabisi okanye ibe nzima kuwe.
Amava joe rogan amava kuphela
7. Yiba liGrey Rock.
Ukuba ukuphambuka ngembeko okanye ukuseta umda akusebenzi, uhlala unenketho yokuba uliGrey Rock.
IGrey Rock sisicwangciso-qhinga sokujongana ne-narcissists kunye nabantu abafuna ulwazi abanokuzisebenzisa njengeembumbulu ngokuchasene nawe. Umbono kukuzenzela ilitye elingwevu- ube buthuntu, ube nesithukuthezi, kwaye ungabi namdla kangangoko.
Ukwenza oku ngeempendulo ezingacacanga eziphendula umbuzo kodwa unganiki lwazi lokwenyani.
'Unjani?'
“Ndiyaphila. Kwaye wena?'
'Ngaba ikhona into oyaziyo malunga nokuhlukana kuka-X no-Y?'
“Hayi. Andazi kwanto. ”
'Uza kuba nabo nini abantwana neqabane lakho?'
'Andazi.'
Ithetha ukuthini xa umfana esithi umhle
Ityhafile, ayinamdla, ayonwabisi, kwaye ayisebenzi. Umntu uya kuhlala ephulukana nomdla kwaye aqhubele phambili ukuya kwinto enomdla ngakumbi kubo.
Indlela yeGrey Rock yindlela efanelekileyo yokuhamba kwiimeko ezingathandekiyo zentlalo ongenakukwazi ukuziphepha.
Khumbula, nangona kunjalo, zama ukuphepha ukuxoka kangangoko kunokwenzeka. Ukuba bafumanisa ukuba uxokile, oko kunokubangela umdla ngakumbi kwaye kwandise ukungakhathali.
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